My Simplified Eating and Training Plan to Drop the Extra Weight

Okay, this is a humiliating humbling post for me.

Before I get into that part, though, first I will write about my upcoming training plan. I mentioned a couple of days ago that my friend Adam and I are going to run the Detroit Free Press International Half Marathon together in October.

Obviously, I need to train for it. Right now, I'm capable of running about four miles at a pace that is slower than a walk, hahaha. I don't have a time goal for the race (my main reason for doing it is to get back to training for something--anything--and especially to run Adam's first race with him.

Since we have 33-1/2 weeks until the race, we have plenty of time to train. I definitely don't want to wait until it's 12 weeks out and then start a plan that I'll dread. I mentioned that I want to really SIMPLIFY my diet and exercise routines so that they feel doable and comfortable again. I don't want to overcomplicate anything at all.

So, I'm going to be doing one of my own half-marathon plans that I have posted on my blog: Six-Month "Beginner to Half-Marathon" Training Plan. This is to take someone from zero running to running a half-marathon in six months.

The plan begins with my "walk to run" plan--doing a 30 minute walk, but replacing walking with running for an increasing amount of time per walk until you're able to run the whole 30 minutes. I'm definitely capable of running for 30 minutes now, but I like the idea of following this plan from Day 1. So, I'll be starting completely from scratch, how I did in 2010 when I started running in the first place.

Since I am going to start the plan next week, I'll have 33 weeks (longer than 6 months) to train... so I added seven weeks to the beginning of the plan--with straight-up walking. I scheduled 30 minutes of walking four days a week for seven weeks. THEN I will begin the actual six-month training plan.

I realize this is probably a very slow way to make progress, but I have the time and I don't want to dread this. I want to enjoy it! Also, while I don't plan on following the MAF method (like I said, I want to keep it super simple and run by feel rather than numbers), walking at a decent pace should help strengthen my cardio system per the MAF method anyway. After seven weeks of walking, I should feel good adding in the running.

I'm actually really excited about doing it this way. It can't get much simpler, and the baby steps will ease me in.

When I first started running, I went from not running at all to running my first half-marathon a year later. I know that I can do this again if I really want to! I used to enjoy training much more when I didn't make it so complicated. When I was still learning by trial and error.

---

Now, about the dieting aspect for dropping this weight (and the reason for my embarrassment)...

I SWORE ON MY LIFE I'd never, ever do it again. But I have reasons that I'll explain below why I am choosing to do this: Weight Watchers.

The last Weight Watchers plan I did was Weight Watchers 360 (also called PointsPlus), which I started in 2012 and stopped in 2013 or 2014. I started counting calories in fall of 2015 after gaining weight back.

I liked the Weight Watchers Points Plus Plan. It got me back on track and I dropped weight that I'd gained--I even reached my WW goal weight for the first time in my life!

Here is a blog post I wrote about the basics of Weight Watchers--referring to the Points Plus plan: The Basics of Weight Watchers.

Here are some pictures from the day I hit my Weight Watchers goal weight in 2015 (I'd actually hit my personal goal weight of 133, I believe. I always weighed in "heavy" at WW on purpose--wearing shoes, heavy clothes, etc. Just as a buffer in case I needed it one week! haha).

I earned my maintenance charms when I reached goal, too:

Weight Watchers was refreshing and working great... until it wasn't.

Now... the reasons I quit Weight Watchers. Here is a blog post of my rant and (legit) reasons for quitting once they switched to the Smart Points plan: Calories vs. Weight Watchers Smart Points. (Keep in mind, it's my OPINION, so don't hate me for it)

Anyway, can you believe that I didn't have enough Smart Points on the new program for this little candy bar as a snack?! I mean, c'mon.

I found that switching from WW to calorie counting when I did was a great change of pace. It's nice to switch things up now and then, even if it's not a huge change. The newness of it helps keep it "exciting" enough to stick with it. I feel like I'm always using the word "refreshing", but it fits so well!

Now, though, I just cannot seem to get into counting calories again for whatever reason. The "spark" isn't there and I can't find a momentum. I'm bored with it.

My sister texted me last week and begged me to do Weight Watchers with her again, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it--I said no. She's tracking with an app called iTrackBites, which is basically the WW program but much cheaper. I tried out the free version, just to get an idea of it, but I really disliked the database.

I hemmed and hawed all week about what to do as far as my diet goes, and today I finally decided: I'm going to go back to the old school way that I followed the plan--with a pen, a Weight Watchers journal, and a Weight Watchers calculator. I bought them on E-bay today, so I won't get them for a week or so, but I'm going to try to start tracking tomorrow.

Looking at the old 3-Month Tracker made me feel so nostalgic for those days!

I loved tracking in an actual book because I was easily able to flip through the book and see what I was eating when I had good weeks and bad weeks. Also, I love to journal so it was just another fun journal for me. (I have way too many journals of all sorts! I have a bad habit of collecting them. Those and water bottles.)

I'm SUPER bummed because I cannot, for the life of me, find my old Weight Watchers journals. I loved looking through them to see what I was eating and patterns in my weight loss and all that. I have turned the house upside down looking. I'm sure I wouldn't have thrown them away! But maybe I did when I was purging everything from the house during my extreme hypomania a couple of years ago.

Anyway, it's embarrassing to change my stubborn mind about ever doing Weight Watchers again, but I'm going back to the program that I enjoyed and I'm doing the simplified version of it--before everything went to phone apps! (I won't be attending meetings)

It's going to take some getting used to again--I forget the PointsPlus in my favorite foods, and none of my recipes have the PointsPlus values on them. So, I'm going to spend some time over the next couple of weeks doing the calculations which will hopefully make life easier when I cook.

The hardest part about it all will be having to measure out my food again. I never used to mind it until I got so used to NOT doing it. But I did it a couple of times before while losing weight, so I know I can get used to it again.

Right now I feel pretty confident that I can stick with this--I love the simple and refreshing ideas of an easy training plan and the very basic Weight Watchers plan that worked well for me before. Hopefully I'll see some progress, because I'd love to start posting it on my blog again!

Continue Reading...

The One Where Joey Gets His Own Blog Post

Jerry was off work today and the kids didn't have school; so, we decided to have a family day. I'm going to keep this post short because we are going to play a new board game.

Since I recently shared a bunch of pictures of the cats, I thought I'd let Joey have his turn in the limelight.

Joey is our black labrador/chow chow mix that we adopted from the local animal shelter in 2015, when he was about 18 months old. (Jerry and I are "cat people", but we both agree that Joey is the best dog we could ask for--he's amazing. We wanted the boys to grow up with a dog.)

Interesting fact: Black dogs are less likely to get adopted from shelters because they aren't as photogenic as other dogs.

It's true! Joey isn't as photogenic. When we had a dark brown couch, you could barely see anything but his two eyes while he was lying on it. But he's SUCH a sweet dog and has been a huge blessing in our lives. If you're thinking about getting a dog, PLEASE get one from a shelter... and consider getting a "less desirable" black dog. We couldn't ask for a better dog. Truly!

(Joey got his name from Joey Tribbiani from Friends, the TV show. Jerry and I are huge Friends fans, and we have named all of our pets after Friends characters. If you're not familiar with the show, all of the names of the episodes started with "The One Where..." which is why I named this post the way I did.)

And maybe you'll see from the pictures that he's more photogenic than he gets credit for ;)

First, here is a before and after photo of when we adopted him from the shelter. What a huge difference, right?!

Before telling him he's a "good boy"...

And after telling him he's a "good boy"...

Joey Tribbiani's "smell the fart" acting... (Friends reference)

These photos are ones that Noah took to practice his photography...

(Noah started an Instagram account for his photography if you'd like to support him--he'd be thrilled! He's @noahphotography.jpg on Instagram. I'm so happy that he found a good hobby, and I hope he continues with it!)

Well, that's our Joey! He's such a "people dog", always wanting to be doing whatever we are doing. He allows the cats to take charge of the household and he no longer goes after squirrels because he's learned that they are our friends, not food ;)  He loves walks and treats and going along in the car whenever we go somewhere!

Continue Reading...

So much support! (And a great goal as a result)

I really can't say thank you enough for the support on yesterday's post. I will try to respond to the comments over the next couple of days. I always hate writing things like the post I wrote yesterday, because I feel like I'm admitting to failure. But so many of you have made me feel like like I'm really just seeing a part of the (never-ending) process. I appreciate it so much!

I'm going to keep this post short, because Jerry is off work tomorrow, so we're going to watch a movie together tonight.

My good friend Adam (who I met right when I started my sophomore year of high school) texted me today to say that he read yesterday's post and he was wondering if there was something we could do together to help each other get/stay on track with personal goals.

This is my very favorite photo of Adam and me... it's from 1998 (Yikes! That makes me feel so old.)

As far as doing something together to get on track, nothing really jumped out at me because I've been trying to think of things like this for about two years now! However, I finally suggested something that was mildly uncomfortable (in a good way)--running the Detroit Free Press International Half Marathon together this October.

You may remember that I ran the full marathon with Rik in 2012; and I walked/ran with Jerry in 2015. I love love LOVE the Detroit course (out of all the races I've done, it's my favorite course). Adam has never actually done an "official" half-marathon... he's walked them and he's run them on a treadmill; but financially, he's not been able to afford to do races.

Soooo... I suggested that we run the Detroit Half this October, and I will pay his entry fee. If he bails for whatever reason, then he has to pay me back. And if I try to flake on him, then he will guilt trip me big time. I feel like this is a great solution for both of us!

(Adam is someone who you can never win against in an argument. I could give him a trillion excuses reasons why I can't train, and he won't hear of it. That is exactly what I need to stick with it.)

Just the fact that this will be his first big race and I'll be running it with him makes me super excited--I don't know if he's ever even been to a big race, but the excitement of the experience is totally worth it for a newcomer. I think that is what is most exciting for me--being there when he experiences the race and gets his medal and all that.)

I love this whole idea... I will be motivated to train (because I'll have to if I want to run with him) and he'll be motivated to do the race (because if he doesn't, he'll have to pay me back for the entry fee). He's excited about the idea because it'll give him something to work toward. So, it's a win-win all around.

I feel like this will really be helpful in getting me running again! I'm not going to come up with a crazy training plan--I'll write up something simple next week, something that will get me to the finish line but without all the complications of training a particular way.

SIMPLE is the name of the game this year.

I also agreed to read a book that he suggested--Can't Hurt Me by David Goggins (Amazon affiliate link). I looked at the synopsis, and it looks really great! (Otherwise, I wouldn't have agreed to read it.) He said it is super inspiring and will likely help me in getting determined to work on my goals. So, I bought the Kindle version today.

Anyway, I love that he reached out and that we came up with these things we can do to help each other out. I'm probably going to start the book on Tuesday (my kids and Jerry are off tomorrow, so we're doing a family day). And I'm going to write up a training plan during the week to get ready for the half.

I have no plan to break any personal records for speed, but if I can just run the whole thing, I'll be happy. I'm mostly excited to see Adam finish his first "official" race!

I haven't come up with a plan for my diet, yet, but for right now, I'm happy to have a plan going forward and through the summer for exercise. It'll feel good to have a training goal again. I wouldn't want to do this race if it didn't mean something.

While I'm not "cured" after what I wrote on yesterday's post, I'm feeling good right now about this plan. And it'll be fun to write about as I train :)

Here is a photo of Adam and me from a few weeks ago. He came over to watch the season premiere of The Biggest Loser with Jerry and me. Jerry fell asleep halfway through, so Adam and I took a photo with him anyway ;)  (Of course, Estelle had to insert herself in the photo, too)

Continue Reading...

Where, oh where, has my weight loss motivation gone?

Raw, vulnerable, honest post ahead.

I don't know that I have ever felt so bad about myself as I have lately. This is a bold statement, because even when I was 253 pounds, I didn't feel this bad.

For coming up on 10 years, people have asked my where I found the motivation to lose weight; how I lost the weight; how I got through certain situations, vacation, etc. while continuing to lose weight; and just basically how to keep going when it's SO HARD.

And for years, I had answers that were truthful and (hopefully) helpful.

Now, I have a full inbox with similar questions, and I just keep letting it pile up because I don't have those answers anymore. I am one of the people who wants to know how to get motivated--determined, rather--and stick with it. (Here is the difference between motivation and determination.)

It's hard to believe that just three years ago, I was happier than I'd ever been. I wasn't running, or eating super healthy, but I felt fantastic. I did exactly what made me happy and I quit doing the things that didn't make me happy.

So why can't I do that anymore?

I'm very unhappy with my weight (I actually haven't gotten on the scale in 2-3 weeks, but my clothes feel a little tighter). The last time I checked, I was in the high 160's. When I was losing the weight, I was thrilled to have hit the 160's and I loved the way I looked and felt. Now, I'm about 45 pounds from my lowest weight, and 35 pounds from my (previous) goal weight. I'm about 25 pounds from my "I can be happy with this" weight".

(Normally, I'd insert a current photo here, but I never take pictures anymore--the one at the top of the post is the most recent.)

I stopped taking care of myself (not just the weight, but in most aspects). Each day that passes, I feel like I'm further and further "gone" until one day, I'll be at the point of no return. I know it makes sense to just start right at this moment and then I won't end up in that place. So why cannot I not find that fiery determination I used to have?

I used to set goals and work hard to achieve them. I used to look forward to all the little milestones that came with weight loss and running.

The things that I miss about being at my goal weight are so insignificant:

• Easily crossing my legs
• Walking without my thighs rubbing together
• Wearing form fitting clothes
• Not being self-conscious in photos
• Actually posting current photos
• Feeling inspiring--showing others that if I can do it, they can, too
• Running with ease
• Looking young! Did I write about what happened recently when Jerry went to the lab to have blood drawn? I went in with him, and the woman working there thought I was his mother. If that's not a slap in the face, I don't know what is.)

I know there are a million more things in this world to feel bad about, but right now, this is what is doing it for me. I desperately want to get back to that place of feeling good in my body, not feeling self-conscious that everyone is silently thinking about my weight gain when I run into people I haven't seen in a while.

I keep trying to have that "just get it over with" attitude--spend a few months doing what I need to do, and I'll be in a good place (or at least better) again--and then I don't have to think about this constantly.

I'm able to motivate myself by looking at old photos from a few years ago, but as I've said a million times, motivation doesn't work for weight loss. Determination does. So why can't I just find that determination I felt before?

I spent the last three months of 2019 running three days a week to get back into the habit. And then as soon as that goal was over, I just quit again. I think maybe I was making it too complicated by utilizing the MAF method and worrying about this or that. Maybe I just need to go back to the basics, like when I first started losing weight in 2009.

Back then, I focused on one thing and one thing only: don't go over my Weight Watchers Points (I was doing the Winning Points plan, which is still my favorite--their new ones are definitely not for me). I didn't worry about exercise, I didn't worry about what foods I was eating and whether or not they were healthy. I kept it extremely simple. Don't go over my Points.

When I switched to counting calories, I did something similar: Don't go overboard. I didn't set a specific limit of calories, but I tried to eat a low volume of food that I REALLY wanted and keep the calories from being higher than what a "normal" person would eat.

When I started exercising? Again, I kept it simple: 30 minutes, 3 times a week. No exceptions. And I eventually added that I couldn't go more than two days in a row without running. I didn't worry about my heart rate at all, and my only real goal was to get faster and run farther. Once I could run three miles, I followed a training plan to build my mileage. I didn't worry about speed work or heart rate or anything other than distance and pace.

I'm starting to wonder if I made things too complicated over the years. I've learned a ton more about running, but is that necessarily a good thing? There is so much conflicting evidence about types of training, who knows what is truly best? Maybe the best thing is to just run however it feels best.

As far as my diet, maybe I made things too complicated by trying to eat healthier things that I didn't enjoy so much. When I first started losing weight, I ate whatever sounded good to me, healthy or not. Gradually, I found my tastes started to change, and I naturally ate healthier (certainly not super healthy, but definitely healthier) because I enjoyed the foods--not because I was forcing them.

But maybe I made things too complicated by letting all those articles and advice (intermittent fasting, eating only whole foods, cutting out sugar, intuitive eating, etc) get in my head and tell me that what I was doing was all sorts of wrong.

Maybe it's time I just listen to my mind and my body and keep things simple. Forget everything I learned and do what feels best, mentally and physically.

However, that's the hard part. Once I learn something, I can't UN-learn it. So, if I choose to eat a piece of cake for breakfast, I would hear those voices telling me that it's "bad" and I should choose oatmeal instead, even if the thought of oatmeal is revolting at the moment.

I'm not writing this post to come up with a solution, which is what it's starting to sound like. I know what I need to do! I'm just writing thoughts as they come to me. I just know that right now, I'm very unhappy with my weight and the fact that I just can't find the will to care enough to do what it takes to change it.

I also have to accept that my life is far busier than it used to be. I have been so stressed out for the past year--and unfortunately, stress is my biggest trigger for emotional eating. I never really get time to myself anymore (I know, as a stay-at-home mom, you wouldn't think that's true--but the change in schools, raising teenage boys, and Jerry's work schedule have made me feel like I'm juggling more than I can handle sometimes.)

Anyway, I just wrote this because I don't want to pretend like I'm doing great with counting calories, or my challenge of not eating after dinner, or running again, or anything like that. This is the truth. I cannot find the motivation determination to stick with things.

I'm going to keep trying, though! I try to keep in mind how many attempts it took the first time for me to lose the weight before I was finally successful. I honestly can't count the number of times I tried.

So, you may hear about starts and tries and quits and all of that here, and hopefully I'll be able to get to the point where I can share some sort of progress. Maybe I'll even face the scale on Wednesday. I really want to just get this over with and stop feeling bad about it!

Continue Reading...