Runs for Cookies

May 06, 2023

Breaking the Blogging Streak

On January 1, 2020, I made a New Year's resolution to blog every single day--whether it was a long, well-thought out post or just a few words or a picture. And I haven't missed a single day in 1,221 days. (Fun fact: If you google "how many days since xx/xx/xx" it will tell you in an instant.)

I started writing Runs for Cookies on April 3, 2011. Since then, I've written 3,511 posts! Can you even imagine that in book form?

My knee injury in 2012

My blog has evolved so much:

from weight maintenance, to weight loss, to weight gain, and repeat x100
documenting my skin removal surgery
from running, to not running, to running, to not running
from racing everything from 5Ks to three full marathons
budgeting and paying off $14,000 of credit card debt
learning all sorts of DIY things
remodeling my house and garage
seeing my kids grow from ages five and seven to seventeen and eighteen
celebrating years seven through nineteen of my marriage (going on twenty in August)
being diagnosed with bipolar disorder and writing about mental health
traveling for pleasure or blog reasons
meeting up with readers from all over the country
making the most amazing friends through my blog
sharing success stories from readers
sharing all about Mark's cancer diagnosis and getting SO MUCH LOVE from my readers
sharing my family's heritage recipes
becoming vegan for ethical reasons and trying out new vegan recipes and "weird" ingredients
forming Ragnar Relay teams with strangers
being on The Dr. Oz Show, The Today Show, numerous podcasts, and even a feature-length film "From Fat to Finish Line".

Whew. That barely even touches the surface of the things I've written about.

Being filmed for From Fat to Finish Line

And now, Friends? I feel like I've said it all. I've been feeling so much stress and pressure to come up with things to write about on a daily basis and I just need a break. The number of readers I have is steadily declining--which is fine, because I write more for myself than for anyone else--so I feel like I've just become rather uninteresting (I'm not disagreeing!).

Writing one of my very first blog posts

Lately, I have had so many personal things on my mind that I can't write about and they are really affecting my mental health. The punches just keep coming and some days, I just need to not think about my blog at all. I need to focus on myself and my loved ones.

Recovering from my skin removal surgery--I wasn't allowed to sit up!

Anyway, I am not writing this to say good-bye--although it does kind of sound like it. Instead, I'm going to just cut back on the blogging and start taking the weekends off from writing. Over time, I may continue cutting back until I decide that the day comes when I am ready to quit altogether.

It's going to feel weird not writing a post on Saturdays and Sundays. If I have something I really want to write, then I will--but I haven't had much that I can write about lately.

When I was not at all happy about having to transfer things from my old computer to my new one.

So, I'm going to try out writing just Monday through Friday and see how it goes. I'm kind of sad to bread my writing streak, but I am doing what I think it best. Thank you for reading, and I'll be back on Monday! :)

My best friend and editor

May 05, 2023

Friday Night Photos: Graduation!

This is going to be a little different than the usual Friday Night Photos. Noah graduated today! He got his high school diploma, and he's also earned 60 credit hours for college. Needless to say, we are SUPER proud of him. So I'll just share a few photos from this evening...

I wish he would show off his smile, but you know how much he loves posed photos ;)

This one made him smile for real:

Me, just being a mom--I wish I was as fun as Jerry! (I did, however, wear a dress and make-up for the first time in God only knows how long.)

And just for fun, I had to do a couple of comparison photos from his preschool graduation and now...

Noah has always been so good about doing his work without us having to push him to do it. And he's gotten all A's all through school! He had started the nursing program but changed his mind to auto tech. And then changed his mind again to cyber security--and that's his plan now. He's going to continue with that in the fall.

Can you believe he's 18 years old and graduated now?! I cannot. I'm so proud to be his mom <3

May 04, 2023

Three Things Thursday: Alterations

Like I mentioned before, I've been doing a lot of sewing in my spare time recently. It's one of my favorite hobbies and rather than make clothes and things from patterns, I like to buy clothes from thrift stores or garage sales and alter them in some way.

Sometimes they turn out really great, and other times they are hideous. The beauty of thrift shopping, though, is that making a mistake isn't the end of the world. I get brave sometimes and do drastic things. Other times I just alter them for practical reasons (mainly so that they fit better).

I am 5'4", and without many curves. I have pretty much no butt or boobs to speak of (and I actually rather like my body that way!). I have loose skin on my arms and thighs from the weight loss, and I choose not to wear shorts or skirts that go above the knee. In my upper body, I have loose skin around where my bra band sits (I need a bra that covers a large area under my armpits).

I say all of this not to rag on myself about my body, but rather to explain that it's hard to find clothes that fit! I usually have to take in the waist of jeans and hem pants a couple of inches shorter. And when I have the patience, I like to turn a boot cut or straight cut pair of pants into a flare cut. (The flare just looks better on me.)

Anyway, for Three Things Thursday, I thought I'd share three of my most favorite alterations!

1. I don't have a "before" picture of these jeans, unfortunately. But, if you just picture them to be completely plain--no patches, no rips, no drawstring--that's what they looked liked. I was terrified to cut them up because I *really* loved the jeans, but I had fabric that I thought would look good for patches. So I added patches here and there, and I got very brave and cut a large hole in one knee (leaving the strings across) and then put a patch underneath to peak through.

The only downside to these jeans is that they are hard to find a top to match! So I don't wear them very often; when I do, though, I love them!

2. This was a totally crazy "fuck it" moment I had when I altered this dress. I bought it ages ago because I LOVED it--but it was too short for me to wear. It went down to about mid-thigh. Also, the off-the-shoulder look hasn't really been in style for a while (or maybe I'm wrong--I don't follow fashion trends, if it's not obvious, haha). I didn't want to get rid of the dress, though, because I really loved all of the black lace.

I knew I was never going to wear it as-was, so I decided to see if I could attach the shoulders to the straps. That was a huge pain--much more difficult than I thought! I liked the square neckline that I created. It didn't solve the problem with the length, however, so I decided to turn it into a shirt. I kept the length, but I gathered the hem and attached elastic to it so that it sits like a shirt would.

I love how it turned out! It was one of the more drastic alterations I've done. I don't wear it much because it's not really a "wear around the house" type top, but I'm holding onto it for when the occasion rises.

3. I saved my most favorite for last. I bought these jeans at a garage sale or a thrift store, I can't remember which. I thought they were unique because they had lace patches inside of the holes.

They are good quality jeans--Silver brand--and the only thing I didn't love was that they were straight leg. This is what they looked like when I bought them:

They were also low-rise jeans, and I don't do well with low-rise. Without having any curves, it's hard to keep them up over my butt! Finally, they were a little short on me.

First, I added fabric to the sides to make them flare rather than have the straight leg cut. Because they were a little too short, I added the same fabric all around the bottom cuff to make it look more intentional.

And just recently, I added a second waistband in that same color. I attached the second band just on top of the first--it added height to the top, making it a mid-rise jean instead of low-rise. And now they stay up over my hips! I LOVE LOVE LOVE these jeans!

And then when you put it all together, I have this pair of very tailored jeans:

I have a couple more alterations lined up and I'm excited to work on them! :)

May 03, 2023

Wednesday Weigh-In: Week 101

Duck was so insistent that he be included in my picture. He was being super cuddly...

I'm having a really bad day today. I just feel "off"--mentally drained, anxious, in a funk in general. I'm sure it will pass quickly, but it just plain sucks feeling like this. This morning, right when I woke up, I just felt like I had to get out of the house. I have so much on my mind and I just wanted to get away.

Since no businesses are open that early in the morning, I drove around a bit and then I had the idea to call my brother, Brian. I don't think I've ever called him out of the blue like that. I actually asked him if I could come over, but he said he thinks he might have COVID (he sounded terrible on the phone). We chatted for a little while and I felt a bit better after that. Maybe I'll go over when he's feeling better and I can catch up with him.

When I went back home, I just started cleaning. I don't know where I got the burst of energy from, but I was cleaning non-stop all morning and most of the afternoon. I have about an hour to rest (and write) and then I have to go to Eli's baseball game.

I'm so tired of Michigan weather! Maybe that's contributing to my mood. It has been SO cold and rainy. Yesterday, Eli's game was moved to a different city because the fields at his school were too flooded. It rained the whole time we were there. Today, it's been raining all day as well, so it's going to be another wet game. I'm surprised they haven't canceled or rescheduled it--I can't imagine that the fields are any better than yesterday.

It's kind of funny--I have a duffel bag in my car packed with things for all sorts of weather. Winter hats, mittens, gloves, a coat, extra shirts, extra pants, a balaclava, a blanket, and extra socks. I also have things for warm weather: t-shirts, light weight capris, a ball cap, sunglasses, and water. And, of course, umbrellas!

Anyway, onto this week's weigh-in. I didn't have a good week at all, as far as my eating goes. Jerry was off work for several days (I think four out of seven) and it's really hard not to snack at night when he's off work. We usually end up watching a show and Jerry will get chips or something--and when I see them, it's hard for me to NOT eat them. It's something I really need to work on--keeping my routine even when he's off work.

So, I wasn't surprised when my weight was up this week:

I was at 140.2. Last week, I was at 138.0, so it's quite a jump. I'm going to try to be extra diligent this week and refrain from snacking when Jerry has days off.

Another problem I've been having is chronic dehydration. I've never felt like this before! Ever since I started taking my new iron supplement that I wrote about last week, I haven't craved ice at all. And nothing else appeals to me. I drink a cup of tea in the mornings, and I force myself to have water here and there throughout the day, but I'm not having much at all.

I've been feeling bloated and just not good in general. I *know* it's from not getting enough water. This week, I'm going to make that my number one mission. I'm not even going to aim super high--I just want to drink enough to help out my digestive system. I never realized just what a big part chewing the ice played in hydrating me; I still felt thirsty, even though I was consuming the equivalent of a gallon of water every day in ice alone.

Speaking of the iron, I have noticed this week that I'm not as cold as I used to be (aside from being outside at Eli's games--but everybody who is there is freezing cold, not just me. At home, I used to always have a blanket on me; summer or winter, a blanket was a necessity. And I would sleep in a long sleeved shirt and/or hoodie and long pants.

I have actually been able to sit on the couch or on my bed without needing a blanket. I sleep in a t-shirt or I'm too hot. I still sleep in long pants, but that's because I feel hot and sticky when my bare legs press together. I used to wear a heavy sweatshirt OVER my hoodie while at home, and now I'm good with just wearing the hoodie. These are positive signs that the iron supplement is working! I could not be more excited. I just hope that it's not too good to be true.

I told Jerry today that we get our physicals done in three months and I want to be as healthy as I can before then. I want my lab work to be even better than last year. So, I'm going to start focusing more on nutrition, like I used to last year. I always tried to get the best bang for my calorie buck with the sole purpose of making my lipid profile as healthy as possible. And this year, I'm hoping that my ferritin and Vitamin D will be better! I haven't been great about taking Vitamin D, so I am going to do my best to start taking that regularly as well. I just can take it with iron--it's hard to remember when to take them.

Anyway, I have to get ready to go to Eli's game. Hopefully it will cheer up my mood. I'm also very tired today, so it would be great if I could get a good night's sleep!

May 02, 2023

Deep Thoughts With Jerry #14

Jerry is answering some more ice breaker questions...

What is your favorite app on your phone?

As a dad I'm inclined to say the Accuweather app. I'm always looking for weather updates and trying to stay on top of any coming storms. I actually think it really annoys Katie that I am always telling her about how much snow we are supposed to get coming up or these thunderstorms that are coming. As much as it sounds like a dad thing, though, Katie is always asking me how cold it is outside or how the weather is supposed to be for Eli's baseball games so she can layer up. "It's 45 out now with a real feel of 30. The wind gusts are up to 20. It's gonna be a cold one, Boo!"

In addition to this app, I am usually playing a mindless game just to pass the time. Currently that's WWE Supercard. It's a card collecting game based on wrestling and you just play some random people online in an overcomplicated game of "whose card is highest?".

What are your favorite social media accounts to follow?

I follow a lot of accounts that are light hearted and just good in nature. I belong to a couple of Ghostbusters fan groups on FB as well as some wrestling ones. I try to stay away from the toxic fandom groups. Star Wars groups were especially toxic after the latest movies came out. It's hard to not get sucked into an argument where you have to defend why you like what you like. Personally, if I'm going to have a debate with someone I would prefer to do it face to face and respectfully. Social media makes it too easy for users to tear each other down and make people feel small because they don't subscribe to the same hate that everyone else does.

If you could effortlessly pick up one skill what would it be?

Learning new languages. It's intimidating learning new languages because it seems so far away from what you know. As a child you spend years learning new words and meanings, including slang. It's effortless because you're surrounded by it. Everyone around you is speaking the words you're trying to learn and you pick up on everything.

As a 42 year old American in Michigan I'm trying out Russian on Duolingo and while it seems like I'm doing good I still struggle with retaining what I've learned. Maybe I'll have to start watching movies in Russian. Just a thought that literally came to me just now. I know Friends and Ghostbusters inside and out--maybe I can watch those in Russian and go from there!

Being able to communicate with everyone is important, at least that's how I feel. It's a start in relating to people. I'm not one of those people who feels that everyone should 'speak American'. In a lot of the world students are required to learn English in school as a second language. I'm not entirely sure why, but I think it might have something to do with business and travel.

Katie took this picture of me doing Duolingo. She kept laughing at how excited I got when I got the questions right.

What is your morning routine like?

Well, working nights it's more of an afternoon routine. LOL

So, I wake up at 2:00pm everyday and start my coffee. During this time of year I'll turn on my MLB app on the Roku and watch condensed games from the previous night. If it's in the fall I'll put on ESPN and just follow the daily sports news.

Katie couldn't find a picture of me drinking coffee, so she made me pose for this one.

What is something you've been looking forward to doing but you haven't gotten around to it?

I have things planned out for the year that I look forward to. I have a trip up north planned with the family, a trip planned for Milwaukee to visit Rik, a trip with friends to do some disc golf on the other side of the state, and a friend's wedding in NYC. So, I have things to look forward to.

Something I haven't gotten to yet--that's a different story. Over the last year there has been some hype about this new Star Wars game, a sequel to a game I played a couple years back. I was super excited to play it recently because it just released on the 28th of April. Much to my surprise, I am unable to play it because my Xbox One is too old to play it. So, now I have to be patient and save the money to buy a whole new system. I was extremely disappointed and got stuck in my feelings for a minute. I knew this day would come because my console is almost 10 years old, I just didn't expect it now. So, I will just have to be patient, save the money, and then get it. I will have it one day, just not now.

What is the craziest outfit you've ever worn?

I don't know why I did this but I thought it would be hilarious if I wore something outrageous for Katie's and my one year (dating) anniversary in 2000. I went to a costume shop and rented a pimp costume. Yes, you read that right. And not one of those flashy suits--it was a purple costume with a cape that was edged with white fur and black spots. Truly ridiculous and I can't believe she stayed with me after that. LOL

[Katie is trying very hard to find a picture of it.]

Is there anything you were working on that you would like to revisit?

Yes. When I bought my Ghostbusters proton pack I found some groups on Facebook that were dedicated to modifying their pack and putting their own personal touches on it, whether it was painting it, getting the lights to work a certain way, or adding different things such as more lights and sound. In addition to this, I have the suit to go with it and I want to get back into getting that all together. Stuff like this isn't cheap, and some stuff is hard to find. But, again, as I said with the Xbox, I have to be patient and do a little at a time. It doesn't have to be all now or nothing at all.

What was the last thing to pleasantly surprise you?

A couple weeks ago Katie bought me a surprise that she knew I would love. I enjoy all the pop culture stuff and I love that it's making somewhat of a comeback. All the stuff I had when I was a kid is now considered 'retro' or 'vintage', I don't think it's old enough to be a classic yet. Anyways, she bought me a coffee cup that I use every single day that is shaped like a green tube from Super Mario Bros. I love it!

Jerry said that he's running out of ice breaker questions, and he thought it would be fun to answer any readers' questions that you may have. So, if you're curious about him, he said don't hold back--ask anything. He doesn't get embarrassed or offended at all! (I know it's hard to comment on my blog--sometimes I can't even do it myself!--so you can always email me: katie (at) runsforcookies (dot) com.)

May 01, 2023

(Almost) Wordless

A packed day today--meal planning, cleaning the garage, and Eli's baseball game. Jerry and the kids are all off school/work tonight, so I'm hoping for a game or movie night.

I wrote a fun post yesterday, so I'm going to just make this an (almost) wordless post. I searched my photos for May 1st, and realized that it was exactly eight years ago that I met up with my Ragnar SoCal team in Indiana!

We ran the Ragnar in 2014, and then most of us met up a year later for a reunion at the Indianapolis 500 Festival Mini Marathon. I would love to plan another reunion; seeing this picture makes me nostalgic. We had so much fun!

Bonnie, Thomas, Dean, Martha, Cat, Hilary, Paige, and me (missing Colleen, John, Tay, and Caitlin)

April 30, 2023

Weight Loss: A "100 Things" Update

One of the most popular posts on my blog is a list of 100 things that changed when I lost 100 pounds. I wrote it waaaay back in 2010, before I even started Runs for Cookies. I was 28 years old and very naïve. I worried too much about what people thought of me, I cared too much about my appearance, and I was too much of a perfectionist about my diet.

I cringe when I read it now. It's tempting to change some of it (especially when I saw I used the now-politically-incorrect term "Indian-style" when referring to sitting cross-legged) but like I said--I was naïve. I'm sure in another 13 years, I'm going to look at this post and cringe just as hard.

We live, we learn, and we cringe. That's life.

Age 28 vs. 41. There are a million differences in these photos, which will probably become clear after reading this post. Some visible, some not.

Anyway, I laughed at a lot of the things on my list because they are just so NOT important. And things have changed so much since then! Here is a revised (light-hearted) list, 13 years later...

Then: "I used to feel ashamed buying candy and junk food. [After losing the weight], I feel just as entitled as everyone else to buy junk food."

Now: I make most of my food choices based on reasons other than weight loss. Namely, vegan food (for ethical reasons) and nutritious food (for health reasons). And Ben & Jerry's non-dairy P.B. & Cookies ice cream (for mental health).

Then: "[After losing the weight], I eat my daily dessert whenever I feel like having something sweet."

Now: I've finally gotten a grasp on the purpose of avoiding sugar. I never used to worry about it because it didn't make a difference in my weight loss, as long as I was counting calories. I've since discovered that sugar makes me crave more sugar. I don't think there is anything wrong with having dessert, but I know that if I choose to eat dessert, I'm going to crave sweets like crazy until I give in--over and over. And this reason alone has stopped me from eating sweets numerous times. I just don't want to deal with cravings and the argument in my head about whether I should eat something or not.

Then: "I went from a size 24 to a size 8 in 10 months."

Now: I don't care one bit about the size on the label of my clothes. I used to want the smallest number possible, whether it looked okay or not. Now, I have clothes in multiple sizes and I don't even think about what size they are when I'm choosing what to wear. I pick my clothes based on comfort, because who am I trying to impress? And does anyone care AT ALL about the number on my clothes? I think not.

Then: Even after losing the weight, I was too embarrassed to post "fat photos" of myself--unless it was a before and after comparison.

Now: I stopped cringing at old fat photos of me. I've even posted them on my blog several times without scrutinizing my body, looking for all of the flaws. Yes, I used to look like that. So what? I am SO glad that I have those photos from back then. I actually wish I had more--there were a lot of photos I deleted after I saw how fat I looked or I avoided the camera completely. And now I don't have photos of some great family memories because of my insecurities. I don't avoid the camera and I don't try to fool myself--I can see when I've gained weight and I still post pictures anyway. I look how I look--take it or leave it.

This was in 2009. I wore this scarf to hide my huge double chin, hahaha.

Then: [After losing the weight] "I only sweat when I exercise!"

Now: I'm not embarrassed to sweat. This sounds kind of silly, but when I was 253 pounds, I was SO embarrassed if I was sweating for any reason at all (because, you know, skinny people don't sweat). When I lost the weight, I was happy that I didn't really sweat unless I was exercising. It was like I thought sweating was shameful. That's ridiculous! Last night, I was sweating just because two of the cats were on my lap and their bodies are like a warming blanket. I have no problem announcing that I'm sweating like a beast for whatever the reason may be.

Then: [Before losing the weight] "I used to wake up sore and achy from the added stress that the weight put on my body. Now I wake up feeling refreshed!"

Now: I wake up sore and achy from being old. HAHAHA

Then: [After losing the weight] "I can wear cute underwear and sexy lingerie now!"

Now: I am right back to wearing granny panties most of the time because hey--they're comfortable! I don't care if panty lines are visible through my stretchy black pants.

Then: I avoided restaurant food because it's so high in calories.

Now: I avoid restaurant food because it's expensive and because home-cooked food just tastes a million times better.

Then: [After losing the weight] "I feel feminine for the first time in my life! Being overweight made me feel like a sexless blob. Now I have the desire to style my hair, wear make-up, and wear cute clothes."

Now: BAHAHA--now, I enjoy doing "handyman" stuff and woodworking. I don't bother painting my nails because it's going to get chipped the second I touch my tools. I usually sweat while working on projects, so I don't bother with my hair or make-up, either. A messy bun, jeans, and a hoodie are pretty much my uniform.

Then: "I even wear cute pajamas now! No more of my husband's t-shirts."

Now: I love wearing Jerry's t-shirts because they're super worn in and comfy.

Then: "Before losing weight, I used to get excited about events like weddings and parties because of the food. [After losing the weight] I enjoy going out so I can socialize."

Now: A typical Saturday night is wearing my pajamas, reading a book or watching a show, and being in bed by 9:00.

Then: [After losing the weight] "My alcohol tolerance is much lower--one to two drinks is my limit before I feel like it's too much."

Now: Well, my tolerance went up quite a bit since then--so much so that I knew it was a problem and I needed to quit drinking altogether. I've been sober since February 2021.

Then: "I used to have a hard time stating my weight because I was so used to saying 'two hundred something pounds'--it took a while to get used to saying 'one hundred something'."

Now: I can pretty much just laugh and say, "Well, am I stressed, overwhelmed, depressed, or hypomanic?" Take your pick!

Then: "My treadmill is no longer a dust collector."

Now: My treadmill is probably the dustiest thing in my house... when I don't have things stored on top of it.

Then: "I've gotten more adventurous since losing the weight. Trying new things, going out more, meeting new people."

Now: Aww, how cute! Now, I like routine and I'm a homebody. And nothing gives me anxiety sweats like meeting new people.

The takeaway here is that I had healthy and unhealthy habits back then, and I have healthy and unhealthy habits now. My priorities are just different and I care far less about what people think of me (especially about how I look). No, I don't aim to look like a slob--I just choose comfort and practicality above all. It has finally sunk in that nobody cares what my weight is, how much or how fast I run, what clothes I wear, or what food I eat. (Well, unless I'm eating too many grapes... God forbid!)

Now, if only I could get on board with "age is just a number". I'm not happy about aging! I need to work on that mentality ;)

[And if you're unsure of what I meant by the million differences in my comparison photos, here it is again: hair (highlights and styled), make-up, nail polish (fingers AND toes!), jewelry, and cute clothes. Heading to a party versus staying at home. Caring how I looked versus caring how comfortable I was. The big similarity is that I was happy in both of these photos.]

I was heading to a Twilight party (a "wedding" in honor of the Breaking Dawn book), which is why the red and black.

April 29, 2023

Impromptu Photo Session

Today, Eli was supposed to have two baseball games and then his girlfriend's prom right after--a very full day. It rained all day yesterday and the fields were too wet to play, so his games were canceled. I was kind of relieved because he would have been cutting it close to get ready for prom, and I wanted his girlfriend's prom to be stress-free.

She and her friends wanted to take prom photos at the Toledo Botanical Garden. About five minutes before I left, I asked Noah if he'd like to come with me since he wasn't doing anything tonight. I was happy when he said yes. He drove us down to Toledo, where we met up with Eli and Ava (and friends).

I took a ton of photos of Eli and Ava, and Noah and I were looking around, talking about how some of the backdrops would make for super cheesy photos. (There were SO many people around, taking pictures for prom and weddings. I didn't realize it was a hot spot for photography.)

I told Noah that we should totally do a "senior photo" session. He graduates on Friday and we didn't get any traditional senior photos of him; he insisted he didn't want them. Noah and I both agree that posed photos are cheesy, and I completely understand why he didn't want them. But I made him promise me that we'd get some fun candid photos one day this year.

While we were at the Botanical Garden, I saw it as the perfect photo opportunity for the cringy posed senior photos. We had a blast with it! We walked around looking for the cheesy photo ops, and even tried recreating a photo that I know I had for a senior photo (I'll have to see if I can dig it out).

Anyway, here are some of the photos. I love how they turned out! I'm glad Noah was a good sport and didn't mind embarrassing himself ;)