Five Years!

Five years ago today, I got on the scale in my bathroom and saw that I weighed 253 pounds. I wrote that number down in a little calendar book, hoping that I'd never see a number that high again. I had tried to lose weight dozens of times in the past, and sometimes even lost quite a bit, but I never got anywhere near a "healthy" weight.

This time was different only because I went into it without feeling super motivated. I told myself that I wasn't going to make any changes I wasn't willing to live with forever, AND that I didn't have to exercise. I hated exercise, and decided not to force myself to do it. I wasn't really expecting that I would be successful at losing the weight this time, so I didn't want to make it too difficult.

You all know how the story ends... I went on to lose about 110 pounds over the next year, and by the following August, I was at a "normal" weight. I continued to lose weight, and I had taken up running, so I was focused on becoming a better runner. My lowest weight was 127.5, but it had gotten back up as high as 156 at one point. For the past four years, my weight has certainly gone up and down, and at times, I struggled with feeling like a failure when the number was at the higher end of the range.

Recently, I was trying to think of a fun post to write for the five year anniversary since I started this journey, and it was like an opportunity fell right into my lap. Someone left a comment on my blog that said, "Are u ever weighing in again? U were so inspirational. Not sure why you don't admit to the number and allow as to join u even during those times. A lot of us lose and gain."  Now, I didn't get the impression that this person was trying to sound rude, and was probably genuinely curious, but regardless, the word that really struck me was "were".

I wasn't necessarily offended by this comment, because I don't write my blog with the sole purpose of inspiring others. My blog is simply an online journal about whatever I feel like writing about that day--usually how my day went. Sometimes I focus more on the weight loss part of my life, sometimes on the running, sometimes on my family, sometimes on my cats, and sometimes on something completely random.

It did make me stop and think for a minute, though. I "was" inspirational, because I got on a scale and posted a photo of it once a week? And now that I haven't been doing that, I'm no longer inspirational?

A few people have asked me why I stopped posting a weekly weigh-in. There are a few reasons: my weight hasn't changed by more than a couple of pounds over the past several months; I've not kept it a secret that my weight is up quite a bit; when I do post about a gain, most people are extremely supportive and encouraging, but there are always one or two people that cut me down and try to make me feel bad; and finally, it's humiliating to have my progress (or lack there-of) boil down to a single number on a scale.

I've written before that I love the show Extreme Weight Loss. But the one part of that show that I cannot stand to even watch is the initial weigh-in. The first season wasn't so bad, because the contestants weighed in without an audience--just the contestant and Chris Powell. But now, it's always in a very public place (not to mention on national television), and Chris Powell tells the contestant to take off his or her shirt for the weigh-in. I can see the shame and humiliation on their faces, and it makes me feel horrible for them. It's degrading to be put on display like that. When the show first aired, I remember thinking that Chris Powell looked very uncomfortable asking them to take off their shirts, so I am assuming it was the producers' idea. As the seasons progressed, however, he no longer seems uncomfortable with it, and he explains it away as having to "face reality".

Anyways, I'm getting away from the point. My weight is up--I have never hidden that fact. But do I need to humiliate myself on a scale week after week to be "inspirational"? No. Posting a gain once is hard. Consistently posting that I am over goal is embarrassing, and it makes me feel bad, when I really have no reason to feel that way. I am not expecting anyone to feel inspired by me, but if someone IS inspired, I hope that it's for more than just the fact that I weighed in publicly each week.

So, with that very long introduction, here are some current things I'm proud of that I've accomplished over the last five years--and they have nothing whatsoever to do with the scale!

1. I'm not afraid of flying anymore. After losing the weight, I felt like I could do pretty much anything--so I did one of the scariest things imaginable (to me) and went for a ride on a little two-seater open airplane. After that, I now jump at an opportunity to travel. I still need a little help from a glass of wine to board the plane, but the fear doesn't stop me like it used to ;)

2. I can run. Let me write that again: I CAN RUN. Five years ago, I couldn't run the length of my street, and since then, I've run 3 marathons, 8 half-marathons, and numerous shorter races. I've run a total of 4,403 miles in the last 5 years!

3. I set a good example for my kids. I go out and run several times a week, I step out of my comfort zone when necessary, and I have more confidence (something I want them to see). I ran a 5K race with them to show them that they CAN do it.

4. I live a fairly active lifestyle, without going overboard. In addition to the running, I go for walks with the family, or on my own, for no reason other than I enjoy it. Five years ago, I never would have gone for a walk without a good reason to. One of the things I wanted to do five years ago was to be able to get on the floor and play with my kids. I can do that now :)

5. I've gotten much closer with my family, particularly with my sister. There is an eight-year age difference between Jeanie and me, so we were never very close. I always felt intimidated by her, because she was the pretty, thin, confident one (with big boobs to boot!). We started to talk a lot while I was losing weight, and I realized we actually have quite a bit in common--especially now that she's started running as well. Being shy and introverted, I never really felt like I fit in with my family--but losing the weight gave me confidence, which has made me step out of my comfort zone. I'm still shy and introverted, but I handle it much better ;)

6. I'm no longer afraid of trying new physical activities. When Pete Thomas from The Biggest Loser invited me to try out his boot camp, I was definitely nervous, but there was no question in my mind that I could get through it--and I actually really enjoyed it. When I went to Minnesota for a race, my brother let my friend Renee and I use his kayaks. I'd never used a kayak in my life, and I certainly wouldn't have tried it before losing the weight, but I did it and it was fun! Going on an enormous inflatable water slide with my kids? Bring it!

7. My health numbers are great: my blood pressure is regularly about 90/60, my triglycerides and LDL cholesterol are low, my HDL is fantastic at 115, my blood glucose is totally normal, and my resting heart rate is great, at 52 bpm. Even with the extra pounds, my health is great.

While I was (and still am) proud of myself for losing the weight, there is much more to the story than the number on the scale. Of course I'd love to get back to my goal weight, and I am always working to get back to and stay at the weight where I feel the best (and run my fastest); but in the meantime, I'm proud of myself for my other accomplishments. It would be easy to just say "Screw it!" and eat my way back up to 253 pounds. In one way or another, I work hard every single day to be successful at my goals.

I can do a lot today that I couldn't do five years ago; and for that, I am proud. Today, I challenge anyone reading this to make a list of things you can do now that you couldn't do five years ago. Or a year ago. Or a month ago. Or last week! We don't have to wait until we are at our goal weights or have run a marathon to celebrate our success. Anything you can do now that you couldn't do before IS success!

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Motivational Monday #74

Happy Motivational Monday! Can you believe summer is coming to an end? We have one week until vacation (!!) and then a week in Punta Cana (!!) and the day after we get home, the kids start school. I did all of their school shopping last week, so hopefully it won't be too crazy when we get home.

This summer has gone by ridiculously fast. At the beginning of summer, I had planned on getting back down to my goal weight by the time school started, but that didn't happen. Summer has always been an extremely hard time of year for me to lose or maintain my weight. However, I am very happy to say that I didn't continue to gain weight all summer long--my weight has actually be bouncing up and down by about two pounds since March. I wish it were bouncing up and down closer to my goal weight, but regardless, I'm happy that I haven't continued to gain.

I've still been doing really well with intuitive eating, and I love it. I'll write some thoughts on it soon, and some things I've learned or struggled with. As far as Motivational Monday goes, this week, I am proud that I am still binge-free :)

What have you all done lately that makes you feel proud?

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Dani is both proud of and inspired by her husband, Scott--he has lost 110 pounds since January! He's also become very active, and just completed his first 5K race in 28:32. Seeing Scott's progress, Dani was inspired to become more active as well, and now they go for family walks and ride bikes together. She is excited to lose the weight to become a healthier wife and mother!

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Teresa began a weight loss journey on April first of this year, and has recently reached the 20-pounds lost mark! She is 59 years old, and is working on losing 60 pounds before her 60th birthday. She completed her goal of walking a 5K, and hopes to run one someday! (Teresa's blog)

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Mara just completed her first 5K! She'd set a goal to walk it under 60 minutes, and she blew that time right out of the water, finishing in 42:06. She had a big incentive to finish under 60 minutes, too. The race finish line is inside Target Field (home of the Minnesota Twins baseball team). As a huge Twins fan, Mara was really excited to receive her medal from one of the players and to have her bib signed. The catch? The doors to the stadium close 60 minutes after the race starts, so she trained hard to walk a sub-60 5K, and was rewarded at the finish line :)

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Don't forget to check out the Motivational Monday Facebook post for more stories!

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Anniversary and Tigers game

What a weekend! As I mentioned, yesterday was Jerry's and my 11-year wedding anniversary. He was supposed to work all day, but on Friday, he asked his boss if he could possibly have the day off. Eventually, his boss agreed. We didn't have big plans, but I wanted to do something to celebrate.

My mom took the kids for the night. Neither Jerry nor I was very hungry at dinnertime, so we decided that instead of going out to dinner, we'd just use that money to play Keno instead. We walked to the bar, where we split an appetizer and had a couple of drinks while we played Keno.

I've only ever played a four-spot Keno card (where you pick four numbers, and if you match two or more, then you win). Last night, I decided to try my luck at seven-spot (you pick seven numbers, but you need to match at least three to win something). Turns out, my luck was terrible at the seven spot! We only won half our money back. But we don't really play Keno thinking we're going to win big, so it was no big deal. We had a lot of fun!

Today, Jerry's employer treated the employees and their families to a Tigers game. We put on our Tigers gear, and took the kids into Detroit for their first-ever Tigers game.

The game started at 1:00, and once we got there and found our seats, I couldn't believe how hot it was. The sun was directly overhead, and I was so sweaty within seconds. Our seats were facing west, so there wasn't any hope of getting shade.

After a couple of innings, I could see that Noah and I were starting to burn. It hadn't even occurred to me to bring sunscreen! The kids were pretty miserable in the heat, so we talked about leaving, but it was only the second inning. Instead, we went down to the lowest level, and stood and watched some of the game there. It actually felt really nice when we weren't in the direct sun. By the seventh inning, the Tigers were down by 7 runs, and Eli was totally ready to leave. Noah wanted to stay, so Jerry and Noah stayed for the rest of the game, and Eli and I went outside the stadium to wait.

We found a nice spot to sit on the grass under a tree, where we just people-watched. We really enjoyed that more than the game, I think! There were some street performers and lots of people leaving the game.

It was really nice to sit and chat with Eli while Jerry and Noah were still at the game. Eli showed me his loose tooth, and it was definitely ready to come out. I gave him some napkins from my purse and told him to try pulling it. He worked on wiggling his tooth, and right after Jerry and Noah came out of the stadium, Eli pulled his tooth out. That's his FIFTH tooth to come out in about three weeks. The last two he pulled himself. He's now missing three on top and two on bottom.

When the game let out, we noticed there were a TON of people lined up outside of Ford Field, which is next to Comerica Park (where the Tigers game was). After seeing that 95% of the people in line were scantily-clad teenage girls, we discovered that there was a concert for a boy band called "One Direction" (I'd never heard of them, but Noah told me who they are). It was actually really funny to see all the girls going crazy. There were quite a few pink limos full of girls, too ;)

Rather than try to fight the traffic to leave right away, we walked through Greektown about a mile to Pizza Papalis for dinner. It was already nearly 6:00, and we were all starving. Seeing that area of Detroit was actually very nice! Some areas of the city feel really unsafe, but the area we walked today wasn't bad at all. We saw a few street performers, and there was one man that the kids especially liked. He stood extremely still, and then if you put a tip in his box, he'd "come to life" and act like a robot. It was hilarious to just watch people walk by, and they didn't even notice him until he started moving right as they walked past. Several women screamed or gasped when they realized he was a real person.

The whole day ended up being lot of fun. I was worried when we first got to the park and it was SO hot, but we did what we could in the situation, and all of us ended up enjoying the day. We didn't get home until about 7:30, so it was a long day!

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Don't forget, tomorrow is Motivational Monday, so if you have a photo you'd like to share, you can email it to me at Katie (at) runsforcookies (dot) com, subject: Motivational Monday, along with a brief description, and I may post it tomorrow!

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Yearly physical

It was another gorgeous day outside, but Jerry was working this morning, so I didn't get a chance to go outside for a run. Instead, I just opened up all the windows in the house and ran three miles on the treadmill. I was hoping to run sub-9:00 miles, because I haven't seen very many of those lately. I set the treadmill on 6.8 mph for the first couple of miles, and then I bumped it up a bit for the last mile.

I was expecting it to feel really difficult, because I haven't been running even close to that pace lately, but I felt really good the whole run. I'd like to get back to running three miles once a a week at a pace that gets slightly faster each week. Today's three mile run time was 26:32, so next week, I'll try and finish a little faster than that. When I was at my fastest in winter/spring 2013, that's what I used to do.

The morning went by so fast! I didn't really even accomplish much (other than the run), but before I knew it, it was lunchtime. I made some more olive tapenade, because I didn't want the fresh herbs I'd bought to go bad, and I still have leftover olives. I ate that with some crackers and a cup of the leftover broccoli cheddar soup from last night. It was heavenly!

This afternoon, I had a doctor's appointment for my yearly physical. I didn't go last year, because Jerry had switched jobs and it wasn't required for the new insurance, but now that he's back at his previous employer, we have to get a physical once a year. Insurance costs more if you're a smoker, or your BMI is over 30, or you have high cholesterol, or other things like that.

I wasn't worried about anything, because I'm not a smoker and my numbers have all been good since losing the weight. I was surprised, then, to see that my cholesterol was high--227! The doctor said not to worry about it at all, because my HDL ("good" cholesterol) was the reason for it being so high. My HDL was 115, and my doctor said an HDL level that high is pretty much unheard of, but that it was a good thing. My triglyceride and LDL ("bad" cholesterol) were both on the low end of the normal range, so that was good.

On one hand, I'm glad that my HDL is so high (the recommended HDL is 40+); but on the other hand, I hope that my total cholesterol being high doesn't end up costing us extra for our health insurance.

It's kind of interesting... when I lost weight several years ago through diet alone, my total cholesterol dropped significantly in a short amount of time. It was over 200 before losing weight, and then dropped to 170-ish. My HDL at the time was 44. This time around, I lost weight through diet AND exercise, and while my total cholesterol is higher, my HDL jumped up by 71 points! I'm inclined to think that it's due to running. Anyway, other than the cholesterol issue, everything else is good.

I was supposed to go to Renee's for wine tonight, but I had a bad headache all day. I got ready to go to her house, and then I even drove halfway there, but I turned around and went back home. I've had a headache for a couple of days, and I really hope I'm not getting sick. Noah is better now, thank goodness, so we just need to keep everyone healthy until Punta Cana!

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My Rescue Story

This morning felt like fall--it was SO nice outside! When I woke up, it was 57 degrees. I hadn't planned on running today, but with weather like this in August, I couldn't pass it up. I decided to take full advantage and go to the State Park to run a five-mile loop there.

When I got there, there were already several fishermen set up. I turned on my Garmin, and then these two guys came up to me (about 18ish years old) and asked if I could do them a favor. I said sure, and then one of them said, "We were wondering if you would smell our bait, and see which one smells better..." I thought he had to be joking, but he was serious. That was the first time anyone's ever asked me to smell their bait! hahaha

They had a couple of buckets, and I was fully expecting the bait to be bugs or fish guts or something nasty. It looked like sawdust with corn in it, and when they squeezed it, it formed into a ball. They were trying to decide which one to use based on smell. The first one smelled like cake batter to me, so of course I liked that! The second one smelled really good, too, but more fruity. I told them that I will always pick cake over fruit, so I'd go with the one that smelled like cake.

The water was like glass, because there was barely any wind. It was sunny, but not hot, and it just felt great! I had set my Garmin to show only the distance, so that I wouldn't worry about my pace or anything. I just wanted to enjoy the run. The first mile flew by, and then I started feeling really nauseous during the end of the second mile. I hadn't eaten anything, so I wasn't really worried about throwing up, but my stomach was definitely not happy. I stopped to take a couple of pictures on a bridge, and hopefully force the nausea to go away.

When I started running again, I felt much better. There were a lot of people out on the trail today, which wasn't surprising with this weather. At mile 3.5, there was a sign saying the trail was closed.

I have no idea why it was closed, but thankfully, it was at a point in the trail where I was 1.5 miles from the car whether I kept going forward or whether I turned around and took the short path. So I just turned around and ran straight back to the car, getting in just over five miles.

I asked the boys who were using the cake bait if they had any luck, and they said they did catch one with it. They said they like to make their own bait and it has to smell good, because they won't fish with anything that they wouldn't enjoy themselves.

On the way home, I stopped at Kroger to get the ingredients to make a copycat-Panera's Broccoli Cheddar Soup recipe for dinner. I've been craving their soup, but rather than driving 25 minutes and spending $6 on it whenever I want it, I figured I should probably try to make it at home. I'd always avoided making this recipe, because it's not very points-friendly on Weight Watchers. It turned out SO good! I made a loaf of homemade bread to eat with it, too.

I made this recipe, but I followed a few suggestions in the comments. Instead of using nutmeg, I used paprika (the comments suggested 1/2 tsp, but I accidentally put in a whole teaspoon); I added a little salt, a couple drops of hot sauce, and a little mustard. I used a little more broccoli than the recipe called for, because I just chopped up what I had (two crowns). When making it again (and I will be!) I'm going to make it exactly how I did today.

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Purina recently asked for cat owners to share their cat's rescue story on social media, using the hashtag #myrescuestory. They announced that if there are 1,500 stories shared before September 2nd, they will donate $50,000 to The Petfinder Foundation to support future cat adoption fees. All three of my cats are rescues (and Paolo was, too), so I shared their stories on Instagram.

#myrescuestory We adopted Chandler from the local animal
shelter nearly 11 years ago. He had been dropped off there
as a kitten. Jerry and I had just gotten married and
bought a house, and Chandler made our new house
feel like a home!

#myrescuestory Someone found Phoebe as a stray when
she was approximately two years old, and was looking
for a home for her. She was pregnant, but the person who
found her had her spayed, and she lost her kittens :(
She was missing half her tail, and she still has a BB
(from a BB gun) under the skin on her chest. We took
her in, and I'm so glad we did! She's used up at least 8 of
her 9 lives by now, but she has come a long way since
we adopted her. She used to be very skittish and afraid
of people, but now she really trusts our family. She's
very loving, and any time one of us is crying or sick,
she loves to cuddle to make us feel better. 

#myrescuestory Estelle was a stray cat that my friend Andrea
(who is allergic to cats) had been feeding. Andrea knew I was
a sucker for homeless kitties, so she called me to come over
and just check her out. We brought Estelle home that day, and
she is, hands-down, the funniest and most entertaining cat
I've ever owned. She is extremely nosy and curious, and any time
you bring something into the house, she's there in a heartbeat
to check it out. Her favorite place to sleep is on top of my shins
while I sit with my legs up. She keeps our house lively and so fun!

I loved reading through all the other rescue stories, too. My cats have all been healthy when I've taken them in, but there are a lot of people who take in cats with some serious physical issues--diabetes, FIV, physical disabilities from being abused or hit by cars, etc. I think it's awesome that these cats still find homes!

Funny story: AS I was typing this about the cats, I could hear a very faint meowing. Chandler was next to me, so I called Estelle and Phoebe. Estelle came to me, but I couldn't find Phoebe. I started thinking about that time she was missing for four days, and so I started walking around and listening for the meowing. I kept calling her, and she kept meowing, but it was SO quiet and far away sounding. I started to think maybe she was stuck underneath the house.

I went outside, and started looking around out there. I could still hear the meowing, but again--very far away. I even looked in the trash bins outside, because it sounded like it was coming from there. When I walked past our porch, the meowing was much clearer, and when I looked on the porch, I saw her--she was trapped between the storm door and the exterior door to the house! I have NO idea how she got in there. She always tries to sneak outside, so maybe when I took out the trash, I closed the door on her, trapping her in between the two doors? Poor cat! Phoebe's been rescued more times than I can count ;)

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Hopeless

Last night, Jerry and I were chatting and drinking a glass of wine, when he got a text message from a friend, telling him that Robin Williams had died. When he relayed the message to me, I literally gasped out loud and covered my mouth in disbelief. A lot of times, when celebrities die, I have to Google them to see who they were; not Robin Williams.

Source

I was so shocked, and then when I read that it was a suicide, my heart just broke. I had just been talking to my kids earlier in the day about how people who have a lot of money aren't necessarily happy (the kids assumed more money = happiness). My kids have seen a few of Williams' movies, so I told them what happened, and it helped confirm what I'd told them earlier.

I know firsthand just how debilitating depression can be, and how hopeless it can make one feel. It's a terrible thing to go through, even when you have all the resources to help. Whenever I hear about a suicide, it just makes me feel so sad for that person, and that they had lost hope. There is nothing worse than feeling hopeless.

Anyway, the world lost a great comedian and actor yesterday, but I really hope that it brings more awareness to what depression can do to people--even people who seem to have everything going for them!

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A few weeks ago, I got a notice in the mail from my bank stating that soon, they were going to start charging a $7 monthly service fee for their "free" checking accounts. That did not fly well with me! I have two checking accounts and one savings account there, and I've been a customer for about 15 years, but I decided to switch banks so that I could have a truly free checking account.

I had no idea just how much work it was going to be to switch banks! I decided to use a local credit union, so I went there to open the accounts, but because Jerry wasn't with me, I had to open the accounts in just my name (later, I'll have to take him with him to add him on). We have a lot of automatic deposits and withdrawals, so I have to notify all of those companies and change them all over to the credit union.

This afternoon, I had to go to the bank (which is actually now 20 minutes away, because the branch nearest to us closed a year or two ago). I closed out my savings account, but had to leave the checking accounts until everything is switched over, which could take a few weeks. I ran into several other issues, but won't get into the boring details here. Basically, changing banks takes a lot of work!

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I'm still doing well with intuitive eating. Last night, I ate too much, but rather than beat myself up for it, I used it as a learning experience. I'd had a couple of glasses of wine (one glass was just fine, but I shouldn't have had the second), and then I started thinking I was hungry (logically, I knew I wasn't). So I snacked on a few random things, which ended up being too much.

On Weight Watchers, if that happened, I would have used up way too many points, and then I would have tried to restrict my eating today so conserve what points I had left. That's a slippery slope, because it's basically a set-up for a binge. Instead, I just went right back to intuitive eating today--I ate breakfast when I was hungry (a couple of hours after I woke up), and followed my hunger cues throughout the day. It felt nice to just move on without much thought at all about it.

Because of all the running around I did for the bank, I didn't have a chance to go to the store to pick up anything for dinner. At around 4:30, I was starving. My stomach felt like it was going to eat itself. I thought about taking the kids out to dinner, but nothing really sounded good (which was odd, because I really was hungry). I was at the point that I really didn't care what I ate (Cereal? Sure! PB&J? Great!). The kids weren't thrilled about the idea of cereal for dinner, so after some digging, I found the stuff to make meatball stroganoff.

Stroganoff always looks so gross, but it tastes so good!

When I first started the intuitive eating, there were very specific cravings that I had, so it was easy to choose what to eat. For the past few days, though, I've had such a hard time deciding, because nothing really calls out to me. It's not a bad thing, but just something interesting that I noted.

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I've had a hard time getting outside to run lately, because of Jerry's work schedule. I've done a lot of treadmill running, but it's been hard to make myself do more than three miles on the treadmill. Jerry's schedule is going to change again soon, so I should be have more free time to run outside. I want to get in at least one more long run of 10-12 miles before going to Punta Cana.

Speaking of Punta Cana, we leave in less than two weeks!! I'm getting SO excited :)

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Motivational Monday #73

Happy Motivational Monday! It's been an interesting week for me with the intuitive eating, but I've been doing very well with it. I'm very proud that I haven't binged at all, and I've really been listening to my body, even when it tells me weird things (like craving olive tapenade yesterday!).

I've also been doing really well with my August challenge, which was to eat only at the dining table, nowhere else. A lot of times, I find myself wanting to eat when bored, but when I remember that I have to eat at the table, I change my mind! ;)

What have you done this week to make you feel proud?

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Last September, Jessica was proud to announce that she'd completed her first half-marathon. It was a tough time for her, because her father had just passed away two weeks before the race, and she considered not even running it. Her training had taken a backseat to taking care of her father as he was ill. She chose to run it anyway, and she finished in 2:42!

This year, Jessica was training for her second half-marathon, when she had a seizure that landed her in the emergency room. She was diagnosed with Stage IV brain cancer! She underwent surgery, radiation, and chemo to fight the cancer, and was told she couldn't run for four months. She started back to running a couple of weeks ago, and went back to the gym yesterday. She is proud to say that she was able to run two miles yesterday!

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My friend Adam posted this on Facebook, so I decided to sneak it onto my blog ;)  Adam is not only on Day 8 of not drinking soda, but he decided that he "might as well" just run a half marathon on the treadmill today! Several weeks ago, in the hopes of keeping Adam motivated to keep exercising, I told him that I'd make him a deal--I would pay for his race registration for the Monroe Half in November, AND run it with him, if he commits to training for it. So come November, he'll be running his first "official" half-marathon :)

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My sister texted this photo to me today, because she was excited to tell me that she did her very first run in the rain! Jeanie is normally a treadmill runner, even in good weather, because she likes to be able to run next to Shawn, her husband (and they run very different paces). Like a lot of people, the rain was just another reason to run on the treadmill, but Jeanie chose to run in the rain today--and she said it was great!

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Don't forget to check out more stories on the Motivational Monday Facebook post!

If you have a photo you'd like to share for Motivational Monday, just email it to me (subject: Motivational Monday) along with a short description, and I may include on a future MM post!

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Running for My Life

I spent all. day. long. reading a book yesterday, which never happens. I had borrowed a Kindle library copy of a book a few days ago that had been recommended to me by a reader (thanks Rose!), called "Running for My Life: One Lost Boy's Journey from the Killing Fields of Sudan to the Olympic Games" by Lopez Lamong. I have to admit, when I first read what it was about, I wasn't super interested. But the reader had really raved about it, so I decided to see if my library had a copy, and I was able to download it to my Kindle.

I let it sit on my Kindle for a few days, and then yesterday morning, I woke up at 6:30, and the kids were still sleeping, so I decided to start reading it. I didn't put it down until lunchtime, where I quickly ate lunch and then ran four miles on the treadmill. I picked it back up and kept reading until I had finished it! I haven't done that with a book since I first read The Hunger Games several years ago.  I'm not a very fast reader, so it takes me a long time to get through a book--but I could NOT put this one down.

The book is a memoir of Lopez Lamong, who was taken from his family by Sudanese rebels at age six when they were at church in one Sunday. He endured a lot by his kidnappers, and several of the kids who were taken died of hunger or illness. He escapes to a refuge camp, where he lives for a about a decade, and there, he starts running long distances in order to play soccer with the other boys (one of the "rules" is that they have to run 18 miles around the camp before they're allowed to play--EVERY day).

As the title gives away, he eventually winds up in the Olympics--a completely farfetched dream come true. The entire story gave me chills, and I cried several times through the book. It made me want to adopt all the lost boys in Kenya! While reading the book, I was reminded about just how lucky I am to live in America.

The whole time I was reading the book, I kept thinking, "I want my dad to read this! He'd love it!" and as soon as I was done reading it, I decided to drive to the nearest Barnes & Noble (45 minutes away) to buy a copy. Normally, I don't like to buy books if I can get them from the library for free, but a portion of the book sales go toward Lamong's 4 South Sudan project, which supplies clean water, education, health care, and nutrition to Southern Sudan, so I didn't even wince at the cost. I gave the book to my dad, who (jokingly) groaned about it, but I know he's going to love it.

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I didn't do a long run this week, and it made me realize one of the drawbacks to intuitive eating--I don't necessarily get to eat more for running more! ;) When I was counting points or calories, I would use my long run days to treat myself to something I ordinarily couldn't fit into my day's allowance. That was a big incentive to me to get out there and run long distances!

With intuitive eating, you eat when you're hungry, stop when you're satisfied, and eat what you want most, so there aren't any "treat" foods anymore. Running farther would probably make me a little hungrier, but that was really the only effect it would have on intuitive eating. So without that food incentive, it's hard to make myself want to run long distances. I'm disciplined enough that I CAN make myself do it, but I just thought it was interesting to note! ;)

Speaking of running distances, I think I've decided not to run the Detroit Half this October. I mentioned that I'm doing the Runner's World Half & Festival 5 & Dime (5K and 10K on Saturday morning), and then I was planning to fly home that afternoon, pick up my race packet for Detroit, and run the Detroit Half the following day. The biggest problem with that plan is that I'd have to pick up my packet in Detroit by 7:00 pm on Saturday; if I do that, I'd have to leave Bethlehem much earlier than I'd like to.

I would really like to stay for the pasta dinner with the RW editors on Saturday (the dinner before the Heartbreak Hill Half was where I really got a chance to talk with and meet some of the editors and other bloggers). If I stay, I can just arrive home late, and then go cheer on Nathan at the Detroit Marathon in the morning, without worrying about picking up a packet or running the race myself. I haven't decided yet, but it would make more sense to skip the Detroit Half and not have to worry about being back in time for packet pick-up.

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I had the weirdest craving today for, of all things, olive tapenade. With this intuitive eating, I truly ask myself what I want MOST to eat at that moment, and today, it was definitely olive tapenade on bread that was calling to me.  It ended up being a pretty expensive lunch, because I remembered that my food processor broke a while ago, so I had to buy a new one! But I needed it, so I'm glad I got one. The tapenade recipe is the one that I used for the Oscars party I had in January 2013.

1/2 cup pitted kalamata olives
1/2 cup pitted green olives (I just used fresh-cured green olives, because they are so mild tasting)
2 Tbsp. olive oil
2 Tbsp. chopped fresh parsley
2 Tbsp. lemon juice
2 cloves garlic, chopped
2 Tbsp. capers
1/2 Tbsp. chopped fresh rosemary (this was the only thing I changed from the original recipe, which calls for 1 Tbsp--I thought it was a little strong with that much rosemary)

Pulse in the food processor until it's as chunky or smooth as you'd like. I ate mine with some thin slices of a baguette.

I certainly thought that, given the choice to pick anything I want to eat whenever I'm hungry, I'd always choose sweets--but that hasn't been the case. I've had a few sweets, but nothing like I thought I would. I'm still binge-free and feeling good :)

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An intuitive eating experiment

My August goal is to eat only at the dining table, and not anywhere else in the house--and eight days in, I'm still going strong on it. This was a tough one for me, because I usually eat while reading email or blogs, reading a book, or watching TV. We eat dinner together as a family, but the rest of the day, I'm on my own, and I find it really hard to just sit at the table at eat, without anything else going on at the same time.

It just so happened that the day I started doing the August challenge, I got an email from a reader who suggested a book to me called How to Have Your Cake and Your Skinny Jeans Too, by Josie Spinardi. It's a book about intuitive eating, which didn't appeal to me at first--I've read probably a dozen books on the subject, and I've tried intuitive eating several times in the past, but was never successful with it. I started reading some of the reviews, though, and because I was doing the eating-only-at-the-dining-table-challenge for August (a common intuitive eating practice), I figured it wouldn't hurt to read it. So I bought the Kindle version on Amazon and read it right away.

I was very pleasantly surprised to see that it was completely unlike all the other intuitive eating books I've read. It doesn't just explain what intuitive eating is--eat when hungry! Stop when satisfied (not full)! Eat what you want most!--it explains HOW TO DO all of those things. By the time I was done reading the book, there was almost no reason NOT to give it a try, because it made so much sense, and there wasn't any question about, "But how do I know when I'm satisfied? How do I trust this process?" etc.

I had been counting Weight Watchers Points, but I hadn't been 100% on-board with it. I would count for a few days and then binge, or just be very unhappy with having to measure and count everything. But, we all know, I'm not good at NOT counting. That's the only thing that's ever worked longterm for me before! But obviously the counting and bingeing wasn't working either, because I would lose a couple of pounds and gain them right back, so my weight hasn't really budged in several months.

I started doing the intuitive eating techniques right away after reading the book (actually, the day of Noah's birthday party), and I finally feel like I "get it". The book explained it all SO well. In the past, when I tried intuitive eating, if I would binge, then I'd say, "See? It didn't work." and I'd quit. After reading the book, I discovered that if I binge, it's likely because I either didn't eat what I really wanted, or I was unknowingly restricting food (even eating to just slightly less than satisfaction could cause a binge, because I'd still be hungry).

In the past, I found that all I wanted was junk food when I gave myself permission to eat whatever I wanted, but the book explained that it's normal at first to eat all the things you typically restrict. Eventually, you'll stop craving them, and your body will start craving healthier foods, but at first, you may want nothing but ice cream and pizza.

I discovered the strangest thing--I haven't wanted ice cream even once since I started this whole thing. It's probably because when I do binge, it usually includes ice cream, so I really never feel "deprived" of ice cream. I've had some unusual cravings (homemade fettuccine alfredo, which is something I NEVER had on Weight Watchers, because it contains approximately 739 points per half cup*), and I've fed them.

*That's an exaggeration, but probably not too far off ;)

I've really been paying attention to how I feel after eating a particular food, too (the fettuccine alfredo was SO heavenly tasting, but it gave me a stomachache for the rest of the evening). I've also been noticing that a lot of times when I think I really want something, I actually don't want it at all. When doing Weight Watchers, I (now) notice that I did a ton of what the book calls "Eating cuz I ate"--meaning that once I ate something off-plan, I'd just start eating a bunch of things that I restricted because I had intentions of "getting back on track tomorrow". But now that I've given myself permission to eat ice cream for breakfast, lunch, and dinner if I want, I don't feel like it's super urgent to have it now. I actually haven't eaten ice cream at all in the past week, because I haven't really wanted it.

I am giving this 100% effort to see how I do with it. I really hope that it works for me, because so far I really like this way of eating. It requires SO much less thinking and planning than counting points or calories. I've only been doing it for a week, but already, my jeans are looser and I haven't binged at all. I've eaten whatever sounds good to me, and I make sure to eat until I'm truly satisfied (or even a little over, so that I don't under eat, causing a binge).

One of the main reasons I wanted to try this now is because in Punta Cana, I don't want to have to be worrying about counting everything I eat; but I don't want it to be a big week-long binge, either. I'd like to try the intuitive eating techniques on vacation, and hopefully not gain any weight while I'm gone.

I'm not claiming that this is it--I'm doing this forever!--because we all know that things and situations change. But for now, at least until after I get home from Punta Cana, I really want to give this intuitive eating thing a second eighth tenth shot ;) The worst that can happen is that I find it's not for me, and I'm back to square one. I've been so unsure about writing about this whole thing, because what if it fails? But my entire reason for starting this blog back in 2011 was to document everything--all the good AND bad, the successes AND failures, to see what works and what doesn't (for me). So we'll see how it goes! :)

Do any of you regularly practice intuitive eating? How do you like it?

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A morning with Oliver

I had absolutely nothing to write about yesterday. I feel like I'm always just saying the same things over and over again, so I decided not to try and come up with something just for the sake of writing.

Today, Jerry was off work, and we decided to go for a walk this morning. Jerry had gone for a run through the woods on the access road that I've written about before, and he told me that it had gotten really overgrown again. He said the path was very narrow, which I just couldn't believe. Last time I walked out there, in the spring, it was really wide. So I wanted to go check it out.

We obviously didn't leave the kids at home, so all four of us headed out on the trail. Jerry was right--it was very overgrown with weeds, which was a bummer. 

We headed down by the water and saw a TON of snails, though--from teeny tiny ones to really big ones. I've never seen so many snails in my life. It was interesting to watch them.

We kept going on the trail, and I told the kids that the trail would end near Oliver's house. Oliver is a Brittany Spaniel that we got in 2007, when we were stupid enough to think we could manage two toddlers, two cats, AND a dog. We had him for three years, and he was the most hyper dog you could ever imagine. He used to jump all over the place when someone would come over, peeing as he jumped. Hahaha, I think I was the only one who really liked him. 

Here he is modeling a scarf I crocheted

Anyway, we found a great home for him with a man who reminds me of Cesar Milan, in that he's AMAZING with dogs. He told me he'd love to train Oliver, and he lives about a mile from us, so we could visit anytime. Oliver was really happy there, and trained pretty well within a month of living there, so we knew it was best for him to stay. 

I've seen him a couple of times over the past few years, but the kids hadn't seen him since he left; so I was surprised today when they said they really wanted to go see him. I didn't want to just show up unannounced, but I figured we could walk by and see if Ollie was outside. And sure enough, he was! Along with his "brothers", an enormous Great Dane and a Siberian Husky. Oliver got really excited when he saw us, and ran over to us. His owner was outside, so we chatted with him for about half an hour. 

When we were ready to leave, he said that he was just about to take Ollie out for a run on the path we'd just walked, so he came with us, along with the Great Dane. I couldn't believe how well Oliver listened to his commands. He was off-leash, and he stayed right at the left side of his owner until he got the "okay" to run. He took off through the weeds and marsh, chasing after the Great Dane (and vice versa). Every time his owner whistled (one short whistle), Ollie would be back at his side in three seconds flat. I was completely amazed. 

It was so fun to watch the dogs running through the super tall weeds and grass in the marsh, because you couldn't actually see the dogs--just the weeds moving around. It reminded me and Jerry of Jurassic Park, when you can see the trees rustle when a T-Rex is moving. Then suddenly, one of the dogs would pop out into the path. 

I love this pic of the Great Dane jumping out of the weeds and grass

We stopped at the water for about half an hour and chatted while the dogs played and got completely soaked and muddy. It was nice to see Oliver have so much fun!

I loved hearing about how he managed to train Oliver. Sometimes I really wish we had a dog, because I'd love to take a dog with me for a run (or just long walks), but right now, we have too many cats to think about ;) Oliver's owner said if we ever do get another dog, he'd be happy to help us train it. 

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When I got home, I spent quite a bit of the afternoon folding origami out of dollar bills. I took out $300 in ones from the bank to take to Punta Cana for tips, and I thought it would be fun to fold them in different shapes. I know how to make a few of them by heart, and they're pretty simple (like a frog, elephant, ring, and bow tie). But when I started looking up other instructions for more complicated things online, my head was starting to spin. Most of the instructions weren't very explanatory! 

Elephant and frog

A collared t-shirt

I think this is supposed to be a bull...?

I'll probably just stick to the ones I know well and fold a bunch of those!

When I was a kid, and my family would go out to a restaurant for dinner, I remember my dad always used to fold the tip into a bow tie. The servers got a big kick out of it, and I always thought it was a fun idea. Before everybody started using credit and debit cards, and I actually paid with cash, I used to continue the tradition, and fold a bow tie tip at restaurants. At my parents' house recently, I found a book of dollar bill origami that I'd bought as a kid, and had the idea to fold different shaped tips for Punta Cana. 

We leave in two and a half weeks!

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