Sometimes I Have Mental Freak Outs

I was up pretty late last night reading a book that I couldn't put down, and every so often, I checked my online medical chart to see of my COVID test results were available yet. Finally, at 2:00 AM, the results were posted!

So, no COVID for me! At least not yet. I was grateful to get the results before morning, because I wasn't sure about sending the kids to school. It was their last day before going to 100% online learning. I was thinking I'd keep them home, but I really didn't want to! Since my test was negative, I felt fine sending them to school.

It was interesting reading your comments on my last post--thank you for sharing your experiences! It shows that COVID affects everyone differently, which is kind of scary. You really have no idea how it's going to present. I'm glad that it seems to be fairly mild for most people.

I had a minor freakout today. I guess I should say mental health difficulty? Haha. I don't know what happened. I am just the person in the house that everyone dumps their problems on, and being an empath, I take it all to heart and I feel like everything negative that happens is my fault and I need to fix it.

I hate living that way! I wish Jerry could tell me that he had a bad day at work and I could just be "normal" and listen sympathetically, then do something nice for him to cheer him up. Instead, it eats at me and I question what I could have done to prevent it or maybe he regrets switching to nightshift (which he did because he knew that I preferred it).

If Eli orders something online and it arrives not as expected (story of his life), I feel horrible about that, too, even though it's not my fault. I just hate the feeling of him being disappointed and it upsets me so much. I want to do everything I can to fix it!

Today, Noah came home and told me that he couldn't fill up his car (with gas). We bought the car for $500, knowing that it might need some work--no big deal. Noah and my dad replaced several things on it and made sure it was very safe to drive. However, it's one thing after another that he comes home and tells me about.

The first time, it was that it just "stalled out" and he had to pull over. It turned out that he ran out of gas. It'd completely forgotten to tell him that the gas gauge was broken and he'd have to make sure to fill up before it gets to 1/2 tank. (My friend Adam sold it to him, so he explained it to me--I just forgot to tell Noah). 

The car is a 1989 LeBaron (super old!) but it only has 50,000 miles on it. We put about $800 into it after he bought it, so it was still cheap for a first car. But I worry so much about something going wrong. The other day he told me that he almost got rear-ended by a semi-truck because he couldn't accelerate fast enough while getting on the expressway!

Naturally, that would freak out any mother.

However, I remember I couldn't drive my first car on the expressway for the same reason. I had to take the back roads, which was fine. But I still feel like it's my fault for the problems with the car because I am the one who told Noah it was a good deal. 

ANYWAYS, back to today. He came home and told me that he tried to fill up his car, but the gas pump shut off each time I pushed the lever. I told him it was probably full, but he seemed adamant that it wasn't. (Later, Jerry took his car to the gas station and had no problem with it, so who knows?)

I kind of lost it and just started telling Jerry (well, kind of yelling, I guess!) that we should get rid of Noah's car and he can have the Patriot (Jerry's car) and Jerry can have my Renegade. I can get by without a car. He kept insisting no, it was fine, but I still felt bad about the whole thing and was catastrophizing the issue with Noah's car. I could feel myself acting how I did before I started my bipolar meds and it scared me. 

I told Jerry that I was going out for little while. I just felt bad about several things in my life right now and I wanted to get away.

I turned my phone to "do not disturb" mode and then cranked up the volume on my 90's playlist in the car and drove down to Toledo. I had ordered a couple of things as gifts from Dick's Sporting Goods and I had to pick those up. I did the curbside pickup, which was nice--I just texted them when I got there and someone brought it out to me!

After that, I decided to look up thrift stores nearby so that I could get some warm pants to walk in when it's cold in the morning. I found a Goodwill store but I didn't have much luck there--I only bought two pairs of pants and they ended up being too small :(  I did buy a couple of other things, though:

My favorite purchase was actually the five board games I bought! I'll have to go look at them and post about them later (I'm comfy in my bedroom now) but I've been wanting to get some new board games for my family to play. Coincidentally, I just asked on Facebook this morning about game recommendations. Most of the games we currently have are for larger groups of people. 

If you have suggestions, please let me know! Lots of people on Facebook suggested "Ticket to Ride". I looked on Amazon and there are so many different versions! It also looks like we need to know a lot about geography?? (We--or at last I--don't!) But correct me if I'm wrong. I'd like to try one of the versions--just have to figure out which one :)

Here are games we have currently (minus the ones I just bought today):

After I left Goodwill, I stopped to buy a shipping box for the gift and a birthday card. On the way home, I thought about Jerry and that I should stop and one of his favorite beers--Yuengling--that he can't buy in Michigan. So I stopped at the last exit from the expressway in Ohio and bought him a case of it.

By the time I got back home, I was in a much better mood. 

While I didn't totally freak out today, like I have so many times in the past I could feel myself getting there. I didn't want to (I like to think that I've gotten past that) so I chose to take a drive by myself--and it helped.

It may not sound like much of a victory, but I am glad that I stopped myself before having a meltdown. When I'm feeling overwhelmed, it's really hard not to completely panic and feel like I'm losing it. As far as mental health goes, I like to think I'm making strides ;)

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Shutting Down Michigan... Again

I'm STILL waiting for the results of my COVID test. I was told 24 hours and it's been 32 hours now. It's no wonder the cases are skyrocketing. I felt sick on Wednesday and the earliest I could get in for a test was on Saturday. Now, it's after 9:00 on Sunday night and I still don't know.

Jerry's not allowed to stay home from work to quarantine unless my test is positive. If I had been able to find out by Thursday, then he could have avoided going to work (if my test was positive) and possibly infecting others (he has no symptoms, so it's unlikely, but theoretically, the virus could be passed all over the place simply because of the long waiting period for testing).

We had learned last month that the schools were going to go to a four-day per week in-school session (so Eli would be going four days instead of two days and doing virtual learning on the other days.

However, tonight the governor issued orders to shut down high schools for three weeks beginning Wednesday. This is so frustrating. I understand why they're doing it, but it's been so hard to get used to the new system in the first place and Eli REALLY needs in-person classes. 

Noah's schooling is completely different because he is taking mostly college courses now and those each have their own rules.

I'm really dreading to see what happens after Thanksgiving. I bet the number of cases will jump dramatically because people will still be having big gatherings. I told my mom that I don't think we should do a family dinner together this year and she agreed.

Last night before bed, I checked the weather forecast for my walk this morning with Joey. I was NOT excited about what I saw!

Wind and rain with a real feel temp of 34? Yikes.

I haven't had the issue yet where the weather really does stop me from walking. I walked in a total downpour in the summer--but it wasn't cold, so I didn't mind it so much. I've walked in severe wind--again, it wasn't super cold, so I managed. But walking during a wind advisory, with cold and rain? I was honestly dreading it.

If it wasn't for Joey who adores his morning walks, I would have just done it on the treadmill. I felt too bad doing that, so I dressed in my running tights and a big, warm water resistant coat. I wore a hat with a brim to keep the rain out of my eyes and and off we went!

There wasn't a single soul outside this morning. I was listening to my audiobook and when we got to a road that is right next to the lake without anything blocking the wind, I felt like I was going to blow over. I couldn't hear my audiobook at ALL over the wind and Joey and I were walking directly into a headwind. I had to hold onto my hat because it kept trying to blow off.

When I was a mile away from home, my headphones powered off. I'd forgotten to charge them and I was super bummed! My book was getting really good. So I had to walk the rest of the way in silence. 

I'm going to write a post soon about what I've been reading, watching, and listening to. I love writing those posts! But I have been waiting until I finish a couple of books. I had a hard time finding a good book and I bounced around until I found one.

I thought my cold symptoms were gone but today they've been acting up again. My nose feels super dry and almost burns which makes my eyes water. And my throat is still sore. Nobody else in the family is sick, so I hope it stays that way! And good grief, I hope I get my test back soon.

Out of curiosity, have any of you tested positive for COVID? What was your experience like? Were your symptoms just mild or did you get seriously ill?

Stay healthy, everyone! :)  Just for fun, here is a cat meme that Jerry sent me. Anytime I sit down, at least one cat immediately sits on my lap. It drives me crazy! Sometimes I just want to sit without the cats on me. But I feel bad moving them, so I'll just sit there until I have to pee so badly I apologize to the cat and as gently as possible I scoot out from under them so they can still sit where I was. Haha! Spoiled is what they are.

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The One That Would Make Chandler Bing Cry

(Fans of Friends should understand the title reference!)

I'm still waiting on the results of my COVID test from today. My throat was sore and my nose was runny again today out of nowhere. I would be shocked if it's actually COVID, but I still have been self-quarantining to be safe.

When I went for the test, it was super fast--I didn't even have to get out of the car. There were cones in the parking lot to follow around to a tent, where someone confirmed my name and birthdate (my doctor had called it in a few days ago) and then I pulled up a little farther where someone came up to the car to do the test.

After checking my name and birthdate again, she handed me a tissue and told me to blow my nose. Then she inserted a cotton swab into each nostril and swabbed it around. I had been worried about the test because I thought they'd have to stick it way up there and it would be painful, but it wasn't at all. She stuck the swab in the tube with my name on it and then I was done! The whole thing took less than two minutes.

I was told the results would be in my online chart within about 24 hours. So I've been checking way too frequently.

However, since I was self-quarantining today, I used it as an excuse to binge-watch a show on TLCgo. It's called Long Lost Family and there are actually six seasons of it. I'd never heard of it before, but I'm so glad I came across it today!

If you watch it, you'll need a box of tissues handy. Each episode of the show features a couple of people who were placed for adoption when they were babies and then they get help searching for their birth parents/families. Not all of them are reunited (most are), but it's SO emotional to watch whether they are reunited or not. 

I didn't realize how many seasons there were and I happened to start with season 6 episode 1... which is what hooked me. (Minor spoiler below, but based on the show's topic, it's not really spoiling anything!) 

There was a woman who had gotten pregnant when she was 14 and her boyfriend was 15. She talked about how madly in love they were, which sounds silly for young teens like that. When she found out she was pregnant, she and her boyfriend decided they wanted to keep the baby and they were very excited about it.

Her mom was NOT happy and sent her to a home for unwed mothers for the duration of her pregnancy. She was given forms to sign and, not knowing what they were, her mother told her to "shut up and sign them". They were adoption papers, and when her baby boy was born, she never even got to see him before he was taken away and placed for adoption.

She and her boyfriend ended up getting married and having three more children--they stayed together all that time!--and they never forgot about their son that was taken from them. They both wanted to find him so badly and they even celebrated his birthday with their family every year. When her husband became sick, it was his dying wish to reconnect with their son.

Unfortunately, he died a little over year before the show picked up their story, so he never got to see his son. But the mother learned that her son was looking for her as well--AND OHMYGOSH, SO MANY TEARS--they were reunited! The mom and her other three children got to meet her son and his wife and daughter. 

If any of you are Friends fans, do you remember that episode where everyone was trying to make Chandler cry because he said he wasn't a crier? (Season 6, episode 14.) They tried everything--sad movies, sob stories, etc. Well, THIS SHOW would be the one thing that would totally make Chandler Bing cry ;)

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A Very Close Call!

Happy Friday the 13th! :)

A couple of days ago, I woke up feeling a little bit sick. Just a runny nose, watery eyes, and sore throat. Very mild, though. Ordinarily, I wouldn't think twice about it, but now I feel like every little symptom of being sick has to do with COVID!

I VERY rarely get sick, so when I am, I definitely notice it. I didn't want to overreact, but I also didn't want to assume that it was "just a cold". My sister works closely with COVID patients and she said that a lot of people who just have typical allergy symptoms are surprised when they test positive for COVID. Since I don't want to risk getting anyone sick with COVID, I decided I'd better get a test.

Ha! Not nearly as easy as I thought it would be. After calling all the locations (within a reasonable distance from here) to get tested, there were no available slots for a test until Saturday. Even the places that accept walk-ins said that it's first-come first-serve and the line is infinitely long each day. I called my general practitioner and she put in a script for me to get the test, but the first available slot was Saturday at 1:40 pm. 

I'm feeling 99% back to normal now (my symptoms only lasted a couple of days and I never had a fever or cough--the only thing lingering is the watery eyes and mild exhaustion), but I'm still going to get the test tomorrow just to be safe. I've been self-quarantining for the past few days to stay on the safe side.

I've still gone for my five-mile walk with Joey each morning, though, and today I witnessed a very close call between an eagle and a cat!

Joey and I were just approaching my house after the walk when I saw a bald eagle swoop down in front of my house to grab one of the feral cats I complained about. As annoying as the feral cats are, I would have been HORRIFIED to see an eagle grab it and carry it away!

Thankfully, right at that moment, Joey ran toward the cat (he's gotten used to chasing them away from our house) and it scared the eagle. The eagle flew away and the cat immediately ran up a tree, terrified. That cat had no idea just how lucky it was!

This particular cat is solid black and likes to hang out in front of my house. Every time I see him, I immediately think it's Duck--but then remember that it couldn't be my little Duckling. Duck is terrified of the outdoors and would never even try to sneak out.

I've been going really strong on my walking streak. I was about to write here that today is Day 124 of my walk streak, and then I realized that the math wasn't adding up in my Garmin Connect account. I started re-labeling my walks to "Day X" for each day. I discovered that it's only Day 117 and not Day 124! I was off by a week, so I'm assuming that I just miscounted the weeks when I started counting my streak.

So, while I'm "only" on Day 117, I'm proud of that! When I look at the monthly calendars, I love seeing that starting on July 20, there aren't any missing days.

Some stats since July 20th: I've walked 185 times; a total of 602 miles; 174 hours and 41 minutes; and burned 60,000 calories from the walks. It's gone by so fast! 

October 3rd is when I switched to doing a five-mile walk in the morning instead of doing two 45-minute walks per day. I like it much better! I feel like Joey and I have bonded quite a bit since we've been walking together every morning, too ;) 

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The Incident That Changed My Life 10 Years Ago

I know I've probably written about this every year for the last 10 years, but it was such a significant moment of my life that it's always in the back of my mind. The date of November 12 is the anniversary of when I fainted and broke my jaw.

I won't write out the whole story, because it's super long and I've already written it all out. I actually wrote it as soon as I got home from the hospital, so it was fresh in my memory. You can find the posts about it here.

Since I've been wanting to be more mindful of all the things I have to be grateful for, I thought this would be a good thing to post about today. Breaking my jaw was one of the best and worst things that's ever happened to me. It's so odd to think that something like breaking my jaw could have anything good come out of it, but it really did help me in so many ways.

Every year on this day, I am reminded of how grateful I am for my friends and family. It was on this day 10 years ago that I fainted, fell flat on my face, and broke my jaw completely through in five places.

A week-long hospital stay, two surgeries, and a recovery that required my jaws to be wired shut for six weeks gave me a lot of reasons to feel sorry for myself. But my family and friends took care of everything--my sister, Jeanie, took Eli to her house in Illinois to take care of him while I was hospitalized and my parents kept Noah for the week.

I had so many visitors while I was in the hospital (I am not even going to name everyone, because I will likely forget some people--I was on some serious pain meds and don't remember a whole lot, haha!).

Jerry even stayed the night at the hospital with me for 3-4 nights. I am so grateful to have a husband who will do whatever he can for me--including sleeping in an uncomfortable chair at the hospital so I wouldn't be alone.

When I got home, I learned that my friend Amber had called my friends to ask if anyone would be willing to make dinner for my family so that I didn't have to cook--and lots of them did! With my jaws wired shut, I couldn't eat the dinners my friends made, but my family assures me they were delicious!

(I still make my friend Courtney's carrot soup recipe sometimes--it was so thoughtful of her to make a puréed soup for someone she had never even met at the time. She only knew me through mutual friends.)

My friend Andrea went out of her way to drive Eli to and from preschool every day for a few weeks because the medications I was on prevented me from driving. Renee brought me some tea and fruit and veggie juices for my liquid diet.

Jerry stayed home from work to take care of me, and because of that, we were overwhelmed with the cost of the medical bills (even with great insurance, the deductibles were a lot). My parents, my siblings (Jeanie, Brian, and Nathan) all chipped in and surprised us by giving us the money we would need for our house payment, hospital bills, and even Christmas shopping for the kids.

No amount of pain meds could make me forget how loved I felt in the aftermath of my accident. So while it sounds odd that breaking my jaw was something to be grateful for, I have good memories of that time.

Having bipolar, I would go through periods of deep depression and I felt like was just "there" and not really wanted. I felt like a waste of space sometimes. When I broke my jaw, I couldn't believe how many people showed me love in some way. Their actions, large or small, made me feel important and truly cared about.

I still go through depressive episodes where I feel like I just exist and don't really matter. When I start feeling like that, I try to remember the aftermath of when I broke my jaw and just how many people took the time, money, thought, or energy to help me in some way--expecting nothing in return. That's special! That is something to be grateful for.

And just for fun, here are a few photos. (The detailed posts I wrote have more.)

This was the morning after I was admitted. My parents brought Noah to the hospital to see me. I broke my jaw on Friday, but they didn't schedule my surgery until Monday!

If you look at my bottom teeth, you can see how lopsided they looked. My jaw was broken directly in the center of my chin and then symmetrically twice on each side. When I fell, the broken bones also punctured through the skin just under my chin and at the bottom of my lower lip. I still have scars from where the bone punctured through.

I had been in the hospital for six days without a shower, and my mom brought some dry shampoo caps with her--she and Jerry put one on my head and massaged it in. I wish I could say it worked well, but I still felt gross and desperate for a shower!

This was directly after one of the surgeries (I think the second one--my lip was SO SWOLLEN). Jerry said some teen boys were making fun of me in the hallway of the hospital, and he was tempted to go punch them and break their jaws, haha.

This was after the other surgery. I was in so much pain, despite the IV pain meds. 

For six days, this was my breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I couldn't even eat the Jello or the popsicle because they were too solid! I lived on broth, juice, and tea.

After not seeing Eli for a week (this was the first I'd seen him since the night I fainted) I was so happy to see him! He'd spent the week in Illinois with my sister.

Eli thought my bandage was pretty cool, so I gave him one of his own :)

This is the bruising and rug burn from when I face-planted on the carpet. 

I love this picture! My siblings, husband, and kids having fun on the day I came home. My mom took the photo--I wish she and my dad were in it, too!

Thanksgiving dinner, 2010. My mom thoughtfully asked me if it was okay with me to make a turkey dinner (per tradition) even though I couldn't eat it. Of course I wasn't going to expect everyone to skip out on dinner! My mom made me a pumpkin smoothie.

This was the most generous, surprising, and appreciated gift ever... Jerry stayed home from work for a couple of weeks (which was unpaid time off) to take care of me and with our hospital bills, money was really tight. My parents and siblings all chipped in to pay for our house payment, my hospital bill deductibles and copays, and even some money to buy Christmas gifts for the kids. I was overwhelmed with emotion and their generosity.

This was the day I got my arch bars/wires removed! I was high on Vicodin and Valium in this photo, and clearly I was enjoying it! Until it was time for the removal. Holy hell, it was SO painful. It was literally like flossing between my teeth with wire the size of a paperclip wire. 

This is what the arch bars looked like. They were wired to my teeth and then to each other, so I couldn't open my teeth at all for six weeks. 

Getting x-rays at the dentist was fun! I have titanium plates and screws on my jaw that held the bones together while they healed. 

People always ask me if I know why I fainted. I had a huge workup of tests while I was in the hospital--neurology, cardiology, you name it--but none of them found anything. They suspected it was a seizure rather than syncope (fainting) because I must have been very rigid when I fell for my jaw to break like it did (very symmetrically). Usually when people faint, they sort of slowly collapse down. 

I'll never know for sure what caused me to fall, but I am VERY grateful that I was not conscious when I hit the floor. It also could have been much worse if I'd hit my head on the boys' beds on the way down. I had just lifted Noah into his bed on the top bunk when I felt dizzy and nauseous--so I started to walk to the bathroom, thinking I was going to throw up. Before I made it out of the bedroom, I was down. There were several things I could have hit my head on, but I managed to avoid those. So I actually got pretty lucky!

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Funny Shirt Ads

I'm not going to write a "real" post today... Jerry is off work and we are actually having a great time talking about an app we want to develop! It sounds kind of ridiculous, but we have an AMAZING idea for a fun game app. And I'm shocked that it doesn't already exist.

I don't want to write about it here because we might actually try to make it happen. I absolutely HATE when people write cryptic posts like this, so I'm sorry for doing it... but I'll just say that the idea is totally nostalgic. And if we don't make it happen, I'll share the idea here.

Anyway, I don't even have any good photos to share! So, here is a funny little story...

Yesterday, I saw this ad on Facebook for a shirt: "I'm sorry for what I said when I was docking the boat."

I burst out laughing (literally out loud) because I can remember so clearly when I was a kid and my dad was docking his boat. He would give me a bunch of instructions that I couldn't possibly remember--hold this rope here, when I get close tie it like this to that post, don't let the boat hit the dock but also don't let it float out, make sure it's perfectly in this spot, etc--and I had such bad anxiety about it! Somehow, the boat always slammed against the dock and I wasn't strong enough to hold it in the right place.

When I saw this shirt, I was surprised because I guess it's a "thing"--other people get frustrated when docking boats, too! I took a screenshot to send to my dad.

His reply was the best! I was hoping not to offend him, and thankfully, he was pretty clever with his response ;) 

Anyway, I see the funniest shirts in Facebook ads. It's hard not to buy them! This one makes me laugh so hard--I even saved the screenshot on my phone because I just found it so funny. It's so TRUE.

Anyway, Jerry and I are going to get back to planning our app! I'll try to write a "real" post tomorrow. Have a good night!

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Activities That Make Me Happy (and that don't involve food!)

This blog post idea popped into my head as I was walking today, and I thought it'd be a good thing to write about. When losing weight, I had to find ways to occupy my free time that didn't involve eating. It was so hard at first! I had to break a lot of bad habits.

Recently, I've gotten back into bad habits--eating while watching TV at night, mostly. However, I've developed a lot of good habits over the years that have stuck with me. And aside from the habits, I've also learned several things that I enjoy doing that are good for me!

Now, when I say "good for me", I don't mean that they necessarily make me healthier. I just mean that they aren't contributing to weight gain or making me unhealthy. They are pastimes that I enjoy and that help me to get through a tough day when all I want to do is eat until I can't eat anymore.

Work on a puzzle while watching a mindless show on TV. 

I grew to really love working on 1,000-piece puzzles! I set up my laptop on the table where I was working on the puzzle and I watched a show that didn't really require a lot of attention. I could have listened to podcasts of audiobooks instead, but I chose the TV. I watched the entire season of Gilmore Girls this way. (Jerry left me this note before he went to work...)

Play a game on my phone.

This isn't exactly an active thing to do, but in times where I have a lot of anxiety and/or I want to eat mindlessly, I love to play a game on my phone. It started with Lumosity, then I switched to Peak, and now I'm completely obsessed with a game called Best Fiends (note that the "fiends" doesn't have an R in it--that's not a typo).

Playing Best Fiends is something that I really look forward to! There are more productive things I could be doing, but when I need a break from reality or if I need to calm my anxiety, this is one of my go-to's.

Talk a walk.

This is SO cliché that I almost didn't include it on the list. I always hated walking! However, once I discovered how much I love audiobooks, going for a walk is something I truly look forward to. I like to listen to suspense/thriller books (the narrator makes a big difference in whether the book will be good or not, so keep trying different ones until you find one you like). 

I get super absorbed in my audiobooks and I only allow myself to listen to them while I'm walking, so going for a walk is no longer a chore for me. I truly enjoy it! I look forward to listening to my books.

Working on a home project.

This is probably my favorite. Whether it's building something out of wood or simply organizing a drawer or cupboard, I can always distract myself for hours! And I feel really good about it when I'm done--I feel productive and like I've done something worthwhile. This photo is from when I built our kitchen countertops. I was so impressed with myself!

Play a good old-fashioned game of solitaire.

Grandma's Game is my favorite (here is a link to my explanation of it). It's so much more fun to use "real" cards instead of doing it digitally. 

Write a list.

Mostly, I like to make lists of things that I have to do. For some reason, writing out a "to-do" list makes me feel good. I feel organized and ready to tackle what needs to be done. I also like to make lists of goals, which inspires me. 

Getting sucked into the rabbit hole of YouTube.

Occasionally, I'll search for something on YouTube (like tips for drywalling, hahaha) and then I just get sucked into it and before I know it, it's four hours later! I have learned SO much from watching YouTube and that's how I remodeled my entire house.

Just today, I searched for the difference between saw blades for my table saw--hahaha! Yes, laugh all you want... but then I got sucked into learning all about saw blades.

Read a good book.

The keyword here is "good". I can't read a book unless I am totally hooked on it. Books aren't distracting for me unless I simply can't put it down! But when I do find a book like that, I don't even think about food. I just want to devour the book. (I don't remember if I loved this book... it was just the most recent photo I could find of me reading a book!)

Learning a new skill.

There are so many new pastimes to learn! Knitting/crocheting, sewing, woodworking, upcycling furniture, painting, drawing, sports, and SO many more. When I was losing the majority of my weight in 2009-2010, I did a LOT of knitting and crocheting. Most recently, I've been really into all things DIY--woodworking, drywalling, upcycling. This is a photo from my attempt to learn drawing...

Organizing

I'm well aware that organizing is most definitely NOT something that many people enjoy, but I happen to love it. Cleaning and organizing a messy drawer, cupboard, or closet is so much fun for me! The best part is that the time passes SO quickly when I'm organizing that I forget about everything else--including eating. I don't snack mindlessly. I just stop to eat when I am truly hungry. This pic is from when I built shelves for Eli's closet and tried to organize all of his junk. (He loves to collect stuff!)

Play a game with Jerry and/or the kids.

We've been doing this a lot more lately. I go through phases where I like to play games a lot and then when I don't want to play at all. Regardless, when I'm in the mood to play it's a fun pastime to spend quality time with the family.

Watch a cheesy movie in my pajamas while comfy on my couch.

This definitely isn't the "most healthy" thing to do, but when all else fails and I just need some "chill time", this is my favorite way to chill by myself. I usually watch a B-horror movie while curled up on the couch with 2-3 cats on my lap. 

So like I said, these aren't the sort of healthy activities that you may typically think of--yoga, cycling, running, etc. But these are "activities" that help me to keep from binge eating or from just eating for emotional reasons or boredom. 

What are some of your favorite pastimes? I'd love to read them!

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Where did my crafting skill go?!

Whew! Here it is, after 11:00 pm, and I just now came in from the garage. I'd been dying to make something out there because the weather has been gorgeous and I love working in there with the doors open.

When my sister asked me if I could make some scrub caps for her, she sent me a picture (from the front) of what she needed. I found a scrub cap pattern and yesterday after my walk, I started carrying everything from my house to my garage. My sewing machine, serger, a huge box of fabric, a chest of all my sewing supplies, iron and ironing board, etc.

I set up a table in the garage with my sewing machine and the staple supplies around me. I printed out the pattern and got to work.

It was actually pretty fun to make! I was really excited to be able to make my own bias tape. I bought some little gadgets that you feed strips of fabric into and then you iron it as it comes out the other end, making perfect bias tape.

My sister loves her dogs, so I chose two fabrics that I thought would work well together--one with little bones and the other with little paw prints. By the time I had moved everything out there, got it all set up, and actually sewed the scrub cap, it had been over five hours!

I took a couple of quick pictures to send to Jeanie to make sure it was what she wanted before I started making some more.

And then I learned that she needs the caps where her hair is covered, too! It hadn't even occurred to me. I didn't see the back of her cap in her photo. So, the one that I made can't be used.

I went inside and started searching online for a good cap with ponytail holder and I couldn't find anything that looked like what she had described. It seemed like it would be such an easy pattern to just make up as I go along, but for the life of me, I couldn't do it.

Today, I was determined to try again. After much searching, I found a pattern that looked decent and I printed it out. I cut out the pieces and then that's where everything went to shit. The pattern directions and diagrams were terrible! I tried for a few hours and then I just gave up. I told Jeanie I am so sorry, but I can't do it.

My friend/reader Gail made one that looks perfect for what Jeanie wants, so I'm hoping to try her pattern! Maybe I'll have better luck.

I was still really wanting to make something today and when Jerry left for work, I was browsing Pinterest looking for ideas. I was feeling totally uninspired. 

I went out to the garage and decided to do something with a huge piece of plywood that's been sitting in there--the plywood looks terrible, so I wasn't sure what to use it for. I figured I could build something with it and then cover it with fabric. Jerry mentioned making an ottoman and I liked that idea. I'd seen somewhere a picture of an ottoman with a hole in the side for a cat to climb in, so I wanted to make a version of that.

I measured a cheap ottoman that we have so I knew what size to make (I added an inch to make it a little bigger for the cats). I started working on it at around 5:45 and I came in the house at just before 11 pm! 

I cut down the plywood on the table saw, glued and pocket hole screwed the pieces together into a cube. I used the jigsaw to cut out the shape of a cat's head in one side. I lined the entire inside and outside with an old fleece blanket, and then I used a gray canvas fabric to cover the outside. (I have SO MUCH of this gray canvas... I'd bought it to reupholster a couch, and we all know how that went.)

Well, I didn't have much luck with the ottoman, either. I made it too tall to comfortably rest your legs. It feels very lumpy from all the fabric. The blanket I'd used for the inside was stained here and there, and I wasn't worried about it because I didn't think it'd be visible. Well, it is. And there are staples visible all over.

Oh, well. If nothing else, the cats can play in it until they lose interest. I only used scrap materials, so it's not a big loss. And it kept me very busy!

I hope everyone had a great weekend!

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