Lazy bones and running goals

Race photos went up today... this is the only
one that I really like. I don't remember smiling! ;)

If it's even possible, I woke up achier than I was yesterday. I expected to be sore after the marathon, but wow--my body is not happy with me! I've done nothing but rest for two full days now, so I'm committing to getting back to walking in the afternoons after lunch. I think maybe moving around tomorrow will help loosen up my muscles so I don't gasp in pain every time I try to stand up.

Oh, If you got a blog post notification this morning, I apologize. It was supposed to go live tomorrow rather than today, so it will be back up in the morning. It's the second "What's Beautiful" post (out of three).

But anyway, I haven't done ANYTHING today. Jerry was off work, so he got the kids ready for school (which was a good thing, because I could barely move). I started to watch The Weight of the Nation, but I wasn't very interested in it. Usually I love watching shows like that. Maybe I'll give it another try when Jerry isn't home distracting me.

Last night, Jerry and I watched the series finale of House. I was VERY disappointed in it. I thought the hallucinations were dumb. And the ending was completely predictable. I loved House, and watched it from the beginning, but I was not impressed with the finale. I'm kind of bummed because two of my shows ended (permanently) recently... House and Desperate Housewives.

I'm starting to wonder what I'm going to do now. I know that my next "big goal" is to work at getting to my actual goal weight; but now that the marathon is done, I feel like I have so much free time! What did I used to do before I started training?

Of course I will go back to running after giving my body a week to recover, but I'm not going to be running 35+ miles per week anymore. My next race is in a month--I'm running the Solstice Run 10-Mile on June 23rd. I've never done a 10-Mile run before, so I'm guaranteed a PR ;) I'm not going to be running it hard, though--at the end of June, I imagine it's going to be extremely hot. I've already proven I'm a baby when it comes to running in the heat! But I like having a race to train for, so that it makes me feel like I have something to accomplish.

I'm not even going to follow a training schedule for the Solstice, because by the time I start running again, I'll only have three weeks until the race. I'll just do a long run of 10-12 miles once a week and then do 2-3 shorter runs. I'd actually like to continue that through the summer, because then I will stay in "half-shape"... meaning I could just register for a half-marathon on a whim and be in shape to run it.

I'm running Women Rock MN on September 1st. I imagine that will be a hot one too, but I'm really looking forward to it! Renee and I are going to fly out to my brother's house (he lives in St. Paul, which is where the race is) and stay there for a few days. We are going to make a fun little trip out of it. I think (I hope!) that my brother's ex-wife is going to do the race with us too. It's been a while since I've seen her. That's another race that I'll probably just run for fun.

I only have two big running goals left now that I've completed a marathon. The first is to run a sub-26:00 5K; and the second is to run a sub-2:00:00 half-marathon. Once I complete those, I will solely run for fun (if there is a such thing)! I was thinking I'd try for my half-marathon goal in Indy next year, but it doesn't look like anyone is interested in going (again). So instead, I was thinking of planning a trip to John's house in San Diego for a half-marathon (John is from my Ragnar team). If I use a buddy pass, and stay with John, the trip wouldn't be too expensive. And I know I would have a blast. I would just have to get over the guilt of leaving Jerry and the boys at home. ;)

Well, for not having anything to write about, this turned into a long post! I've got to get the kids ready for bed now. Hopefully tomorrow I will have something a little more interesting to write about!

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A new toy

I had no idea that my legs could be so sore! WOW. I've been taking Motrin every 6-8 hours, but it's seriously hard to walk. I'm definitely taking a whole week off of running, possibly two weeks. It will be good to let my knee heal up, too.

When I woke up this morning, I was definitely in a better mood than I was yesterday regarding the marathon. I think some people misunderstood me when I said I wasn't feeling excited or proud... I didn't mean that I was mad at myself, or down about my time/pace, or anything like that. I just meant that I didn't really FEEL anything except for relief that it was over. I had worked myself up so much about it, and to have it finally be over was a nice feeling.

And besides, I don't think that my finish time was BAD at all! The only reason I felt slightly disappointed about it was because our training pace was faster than our marathon pace. For most people, it's the opposite. You train at a slower pace than you will run the race. But we trained in mostly ideal weather conditions, so we weren't really prepared for the heat.

Today, I am actually feeling excited about my accomplishment. I put my sticker on my car last night, and seeing it this morning made me smile. I think my biggest disappointment yesterday was crossing the finish line and NOT feeling the excitement and pride that so many people told me I would feel in that moment. As I crossed the finish line, the only thing I could think of was, "I can stop running now... YAY!" I guess it just took a while for that pride to kick in (and reading your comments certainly helped!!)

So as of today, yes--I am proud of myself for running a marathon yesterday! A few years ago, I never would have imagined, in a million years, that I would ever run a marathon. And yesterday, I did just that. I had a lot of obstacles--the heat, the humidity, my knee pain, the mental barriers--but I pushed through those. I still have no idea how I managed to push through, but I did! ;)

I still don't have any desire to do another full, however... but perhaps someday, after I forget the bad stuff about the first one, I will get that desire. Certainly not anytime soon!

---

I took a big leap today and bought an iPhone. I've never been big into cell phones, and I've always chosen simplicity over the bells and whistles. But my 3-year old phone fell and broke last week, and it was still working, but it kept coming apart. So I decided to upgrade to a smart phone.

Since my contract was up with Verizon, I could get the iPhone 4S for $200. Yes, that is still a lot of money--but I have had a cell phone for 12 years, and I have NEVER paid for one--I just took whatever Verizon was offering for free when my contract was up to renew.

Jerry has a Droid, but I chose to get an iPhone--not sure why, it just sounded good to me. I'm already in LOVE with it. The whole Siri thing is awesome--I've been talking to her all morning ;) I love that she can even type out my text messages for me, because getting used to a touch screen for typing is going to be hard.

I love that I don't have to type out my food log--I can just scan the bar code on my food and it adds it in there! That is a huge time saver. And it kind of makes tracking my food more fun.Which leads me to my next goal--reaching my goal weight.

Remember how I said I wanted to focus on reaching goal this summer? All through marathon training, I was slacking off with my diet a lot--so I have to reign it in and get focused again. And that means counting calories again until I feel more in control.

I didn't weigh myself when I got home from Cleveland, because I really don't want to know what running a marathon did to my weight--whether I'm retaining water or maybe dehydrated, I just don't want to know. I'll get on the scale Friday to see where I stand!

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I found out today which issue of Fitness I will make an appearance in. You can find me in the June 26th issue of Fitness magazine, along with 11 other bloggers who were named Fitterati's. I will also be posting occasionally on Fitness.com, so I will always link to that when I do.

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Cleveland Marathon race report

If you're in a hurry, I will start by saying I finished. It's done. I never, ever have to do it again! :)

I woke up to the alarm clock today at 4:00 AM. I had JUST fallen asleep at around 3:00, so I barely slept a wink last night. I didn't want to wake the kids, so I went into the bathroom and made coffee pot oatmeal (just heated water from the coffee pot, poured over quick cooking oats and added a packet of sugar. Then I topped it with a big glob of peanut butter.

And I ate that with a fork. I had to get creative with breakfast at the hotel, because they didn't have a continental breakfast. I also had a cup of tea.

Got dressed in my black and yellow UA outfit, and read e-mails and stuff until it was time to go. And when I say go, I mean, GO--to the bathroom. That's VERY important to do before a race ;) So after I had to go, then it was time to go--downstairs and outside, where Jessica, Renee, and Andrea were going to pick me up. We actually didn't have to drive far before we had to park--maybe a half-mile. Then we walked to the Brown's stadium, where the starting line was.

After a few trips to the bathroom, and hanging around, we finally went to our corrals. It took a while to walk to the end, where we were going to start. Jessica wanted to start with the 4:40 pacer, who we met at the expo. I was nervous about going that fast, but there was no pressure to STAY with him, so we just started there.

I was SO NERVOUS. Like, about-to-vomit kind of nervous. When the race started, it took a few minutes to get to the starting line, and Jessica was getting farther ahead of me. As soon as we started running, I just felt "off". My legs were heavy, and I just had a bad feeling about the race. The first half-mile or so is all up hill. Jessica was getting farther ahead, and I knew I couldn't keep her pace. So I just kept reminding myself that I was running my own race, and if I had to do it alone, so be it. Here is the course map:

I was feeling discouraged already, and it was less than a mile into the marathon. When I got to the first water station, I walked through it, as planned, and then started running again, hoping to catch up with Jessica. I did see her for a few moments, but I could tell she was having a much better running day than I was, so I just let her go ahead. I fell back to a comfortable pace for me, and started thinking about what to do.

I was not happy--I couldn't remember why I was doing this race, why I even wanted to run a marathon, or any of that. My knee was already hurting pretty badly. So, I made the decision sometime around mile two or three that I was going to run the half-marathon instead. The half and full ran together until mile 12ish, so I figured I would just follow the signs for the half at that point. I would have quit right then if Jerry and the kids weren't waiting for me at mile 12.

Right as I made that decision, I felt much better. I even planned out what I was going to write on my blog about it, and I started thinking about how disappointed everyone would be; but I kept telling myself that I had to do what I wanted, not anyone else. I noticed a woman in front of me wearing a shirt that said on the back, "7 kids -80 pounds + 26.2 miles = priceless first marathon!" I thought that was really cute. She was wearing headphones, and normally I don't try to talk to people with headphones, but something made me say, "I love your shirt!" and then tell her that I was a fellow weight-loser. That was the beginning of about a 12-mile conversation.

Not sure what mile this was taken... Andrea took the picture

I learned her name was Tina, and we talked quite a bit--it was helping the time pass quickly, and for that I was really grateful! I was still planning on dropping out after 13.1 miles, but talking with her made the race bearable. It was EXTREMELY hot--I know a lot of you don't think 85 is hot, but they issued a "red flag". Which, according to the International Marathon Medical Directors Association, "This means that all runners should be aware that heat injury is possible. Those susceptible to heat are advised not to compete, and all runners are urged to slow their pace and hydrate adequately."

I was walking through all the water stations, and keeping a pretty slow pace of about 11:20 per mile. At each station, I would drink Powerade, and then pour a cup of water on my head and down my shirt. Pouring the water on me helped with the heat a lot. When I got to the 12-mile mark, I saw Jerry and the boys. I was so glad to see them! The boys were holding their signs, and I gave them hugs (and sobbed, of course).

I started running again, and was trying to decided quickly whether to leave the course for the half-marathon or go on for the full. I had called Rik (my Ragnar team captain) last night, and he was so confident in me and made me feel like I could actually do this--reminding me that it's all mental, and I really needed to think positively--so I thought about what he would say to me. He (of course) would tell me not to quit! And something about that, plus talking to Tina (she's next to me in that photo above), helped me to make the decision to stay on the course. 

Tina and I both mentioned at the 13.1 mile mark that we have a hard time after that point--that our energy and ability starts to deteriorate. We got kind of quiet and we were running on this DREADFUL part of the course. It was a really long strip of boring, full-sun road. At that point, it was hard for me to keep going. I started taking an occasional walk break (other than the water stations) to make my knee feel better. Somewhere after 15 miles, I lost Tina behind me somewhere, so I had to continue alone. 

I just kept running and taking short walk breaks. I saw a quite a few people who had collapsed and were receiving medical care. That made me nervous! I made sure to eat my Gu on time, and drink Powerade at every station. I kept my pace slow, and walked if I felt my heart or breathing get too high. At around mile 19, I saw a hot pink shirt waaaay in the distance in front of me--and I squinted to make out the purple shorts, and dark braided hair. It was Jessica! 

I started running as fast as I comfortably could at that point, because I really wanted to catch up with her. I was gaining on her, but it was taking a while, and I didn't know how long I could keep it up. She was out of shouting-reach. I saw a porta-potty up ahead of her, and hoped that she had to go (the odds were DEFINITELY in my favor, considering how much water she drank yesterday and this morning, haha). She did! She stopped at the porta-potty, so I slowed to a walk to catch my breath, and reached the porta-potty while she was in there. I stopped outside of it, and a man outside said, "Trust me, you don't want to go in there". I said, "I just saw my friend go in there--I'm going to wait for her!"

Then I heard Jessica say from inside, "KATIE?! Is that you?" When she came out, we hugged and we both started crying (yes, crying). We had just reached 20 miles in, and we met back up. We were both relieved to be able to finish together, because we both needed the support at that point. We agreed to stick together the rest of the way. Both of us were feeling the pain, so we ran and walked as we felt like it. We walked through the water stations, and I kept my routine of the Powerade and dumping of water on my head.

I think all the excess Powerade got to my stomach, because it started feeling very rumbly around mile 21. Like, I-need-a-bathroom-right-NOW kind of rumbly. Luckily, we didn't have to go far. That was the first time I'd EVER had to stop to go to the bathroom in the middle of a run. But my stomach felt better, so it was worth it. We could see the skyline of the city ahead, and I wanted to be there already so badly (that's where the finish line was).

We went through a crappy part of town, and I saw these guys fighting in a yard. There were three of them, and two of them were throwing punches at each other. One of the guys had a baby in a stroller next to him, and the other guy started picking up bricks from the ground, and throwing them at the guy with the baby. I couldn't believe it! The guy went after him, and I just turned my head and kept running, because I wanted to get the hell out of there.

About three miles from the finish, Renee and Andrea met up with us. I felt bad, because we were walking more than running at that point. My knee was hurting so bad it brought tears to my eyes with each step. I'm sure I was miserable company, but they stuck with us and actually ran/walked with us for the last few miles. I have to say, they were AMAZING to have there--Jessica and I had our own personal cheerleaders! I don't know of very many people who would do something like that for a friend, and I was so grateful to both of them.

Andrea with the sign she made (and she made a t-shirt with our names too)

 We did a lot of walking those last few miles, mainly on my part. My knee was hurting so badly! But then the 5:30 pacer passed us, so we decided to run in the last mile or so. I was in pain, but I kept going--and the last half mile was a slight downhill (not steep enough to cause more pain, but enough to not feel like so much work). The finish line felt like it took FOREVER to get to--probably because it was actually at mile 26.74 for me, rather than 26.2, according to my Garmin. (Jerry later told me that a lot of runners were complaining about how the course was so long, because their GPS watches were saying 26.7 ish)


When we finally saw the finish line, I was searching the crowd for Jerry and the boys, but didn't see them. Jessica and I grabbed hands and crossed the finish line. Then I saw Jerry in front of me, and I kind of collapsed into him, crying and saying, "My knee hurts! It was awful!"


I grabbed some pretzels, some dried fruit, water, and a banana, and started wolfing down the food. Then I stood in front of a couple of fans they had going with water spraying out. I started telling Jerry about Tina, when I said, "I hope that she finished... I want to go watch the finish line for her." And as soon as I turned around, she was there! She was just ahead of me, looking totally worn out, with her husband. I went up and hugged her and thanked her--if it wasn't for her, I'm sure I would have quit at 13.1. 


Then we took some pictures...

Jessica and me

With Renee, who is the friend who got us both into running... she's amazing!

With my boys

The bling... the guitar in the middle spins around. Pretty fun!

Noah and his sign

Eli and his sign (he worked on this for HOURS at the hotel last night)

I went and sat in the grass and waited for Jerry to go get the Jeep. My legs hurt SO BADLY. I was limping and barely able to move. Mainly because of my knee, but both legs are stiff. On the way home, we stopped (because BOTH boys had to go poop this time, of course); and because I wanted a Cinnabon ;)  Jerry ordered it, because I couldn't get out of the car, so he told the woman, "With extra frosting, because my wife loves frosting!" 


Here are my splits:

Mile 22 included my bathroom break ;) 24-26 was a lot of walking

And my Garmin summary:

The calories aren't right, because I forgot my heart rate monitor! :(

My official results:

The "place" on here isn't really correct--this was including ALL the
races (5K, 10K, half, and full). There were only 2628 finishers of the
full marathon--1,038 female finishers; 194 finishers in my division.

Not very impressive stats, I realize that. I was hoping I'd feel super accomplished when I was done, but for some reason, I don't feel proud, or happy, or excited about my results (yet). I just feel indifferent. And relieved that it's done. I never really had a time goal (although I would have liked to finish under 5 hours). I'm disappointed that I walked a lot at the end (I had only planned to walk the water stations), but I feel like I did the best I could in the circumstances. I am actually glad everything worked out the way it did--I am really happy to have met and run with Tina, and Jessica and I got to finish together. I'm "technically" a marathoner, so I can cross that off the bucket list.


But for everyone that keeps asking if I'll do another? No! Hahaha, I have a whole new appreciation for half-marathons. They are MUCH more fun, they aren't as hard on your body, and they don't take as much time to train for. I also have a whole new appreciation for marathoners--I now realize how hard a marathon is!

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Cleveland, Day 2

Oh, my nerves!

Less than 12 hours to the start of the marathon as I type this. I wish I could say that I was super excited, but the truth is, I'm terrified. I keep thinking, "What if I don't finish?" because everybody knows about this. I can't hide it if I don't finish. Everyone will know I failed.

Today was a really rough day. I was so tempted to just pack up and go home. My kids were driving me CRAZY with the fighting, and the whining, and the "I'm tired!" and "I'm hungry!" and "I don't want to go there!" and all that.

We took the kids to the Brown's stadium for the kids fun run at 11. My kids have never done a race before, and they were really nervous about it. I had to bribe them in order to get them to agree to the race. It was organized into age groups, which was nice--Eli ran with the 4-6 years olds (100 yards) and Noah ran with the 7-8 year olds (1/4 mile, one lap around the football field).

The 4-6 year olds at the starting line

 There was a LOT of waiting around, and people speaking, which I thought was ridiculous--kids don't have an attentions span for that! But finally, it was time to start. Eli's went first--there were tons of kids, and it was hard to see him. But once the gun sounded the clown counted down, it was easier to spot him. I was so proud of him!! He ran across the field like a champ, and Jerry was waiting at the other end for him.

Then it was Noah's turn. Again, a LOT of kids--but his age group was divided into boys and girls, so it was a little easier to spot him. I got choked up as I watched--he was one of the last kids (probably about 4-5 kids behind him), but he never broke stride or anything. He just kept going, and then he sprinted at the very end and passed a bunch of kids. I was surprised he had any energy left--usually kids will sprint from the start on their first race, and then have to walk it in. I kept reminding Noah to start slow ;)

With their medals after the race

 I can never deny that they are my children...

We run for COOKIES!!

Shortly after that, Eli started complaining that his rib was hurting, and Noah was complaining that his heel was hurting. They were both hungry, tired, and driving me crazy. That's when I started to lose it. I was pissed that they couldn't give me this ONE WEEKEND to be happy for me and let me be stress-free. I explained that running a marathon is a big deal to me, like a birthday is to them--and that they should treat me special, like I do on their birthdays. Noah was really good, but Eli was pouting and mad at me all afternoon.

We went to the expo before dinner.

Jessica and me

I picked up my packet, and then shopped around. We got a ton of free stuff! Jerry and each of the kids won a Starkist tuna t-shirt, and Starkist was handing out tons of packs of tuna. We ended up with all this:

Good thing I'm a fan of tuna. We also got a t-shirt for pledging to ride our bikes more often. I bought a few things, too. I got some Gu for tomorrow (I found the Chocolate Mint flavor I've been looking everywhere for), and two new stickers for my car. The one I have on there now says, "13.1 miles 'cause I'm only HALF-crazy". But that won't be relevant after tomorrow, so I am going to replace it with a regular old 13.1 sticker. And then I got a 26.2 one that says, "26.2 miles. Been there. Run that."

I really like the race shirts we got. The color is awesome!! And there is a cool guitar on the back...

 When I saw my bib, the whole thing got very real and scary. Like, I'm actually going to run a marathon tomorrow. Twenty-six point fucking two miles. Who DOES THAT?!

 My kids have lots of confidence in me :)  They made me these signs when they stayed the night at my parents' house on Thursday...

Eli sounded out "Katie", obviously;  that's a cookie, and water bottle, and me
holding a water bottle. And flowers. He said the blue thing in the middle was a
tear drop--not sure what that is about!

Noah, promoting Runs for Cookies ;)

I took the advice of Rik, the captain of my Ragnar team, and made a pre-marathon video. I mostly made this for myself, but I figured I would share it with all of you, so you can see how I'm feeling about this whole thing.

Here goes nothing....

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Cleveland (Day 1)

I'm here in Cleveland! I can't believe it's actually the marathon weekend. I'm terrified out of my mind, but there really is no turning back now. I didn't get much any packing done yesterday, so I had to get up early today and pack. Estelle was extremely curious, per usual:

We finally headed out at about nine o'clock this morning. We had just gotten on the Ohio turnpike (a toll road that has VERY few exits) when Eli said he had to go to the bathroom. And not just pee, either. We started waiting for an exit, and I got worried he was seriously going to poop his pants in the car. I was tempted to just pull over and let him go outside, but we finally saw an exit to another highway. We found a gas station in the middle of nowhere.

Of course they didn't have public restrooms, and they told us we had to use the porta-potty outside behind the building. A six-year old boy, porta-potties, and a germaphobe mom don't mix very well. Jerry just took care of Eli and I sat in the car pretending that he was in a nice, clean restroom somewhere. So our drive started off very well! I read my Runner's World magazine, and I read something that I found hysterical (and totally something I would write!):

Awesome!

The hotel said we could check in early, so we went right there and unloaded our stuff. Then we decided to go to Melt Bar & Grilled for lunch. I had seen it on The Food Network, and I'd heard really good things about it. When we got there, I immediately thought, "This place is awesome!" The decorations were really fun. When the host took my name to wait for a table, they had me pull a fake name tag from a basket... and I laughed when I saw it:

"San Dimas High School football rules!"

The menu was amazing. They had some really creative sandwich concoctions! They had a special that looked extremely interesting, and I was tempted to order it just for the novelty of it. But I'm not a huge "deep fried sandwich" kind of girl.

"The Glazed & Very Confused Donut Bacon Burger Melt"... an 8-oz ground steak
burger; crisp hickory bacon; glazed donut; herb cream cheese; sweet berry
jalapeno jam; then slathered in donut batter and deep fried to sweet perfection.

Crazy, right?! I didn't want to get a "plain Jane" sandwich, so I picked something that sounded like it might be really good. The "Turtle Pizza Roll Melt", which was described on the menu as: "authentic pizza rolls, homemade marinara, basil pesto cream cheese, provolone & romano". The "authentic pizza rolls" cracked me up--no off-brand pizza rolls for this sandwich! ;)

When the food came, I was kind of shocked at how huge it was:

Ohmygoodnessgracious, I am not lying when I say that was the BEST sandwich I've ever had!! It was SO good. Before I took a bite, I figured I'd eat half so that I wouldn't get too full. But once I ate a bite, I just couldn't stop. I ate the entire sandwich, about 1/3 of the fries, and about five bites of the coleslaw (the coleslaw was good, but I wanted to fill my belly with the REALLY good stuff). The basil pesto cream cheese was amazing.

When we left Melt, we went to the Great Lakes Science Center. Jerry and I went there before, and I remembered enjoying it; but today, I wasn't impressed. We spent $55 for the four of us to get in, and about half of the exhibits weren't working. We were done in about 20 minutes, but then there was a play area that the kids played in for a long time--so at least they had fun doing that.

When we were done with the Science Center, we came back to the hotel because the boys were excited to swim. Tomorrow, the kids are actually going to do the Kids Fun Run--I'm so glad that they want to do it! I had to bribe them--I told them I would give them each a Gu before the race if they would do it, lol. Then we'll probably meet up with Jessica, Renee, and Andrea. Not sure exactly what our plans are for the afternoon, but we have dinner reservations at Buca di Beppo tomorrow to carb load.

By the way, thank you so much for the nice comments on my post yesterday! I was embarrassed posting those pictures, but from what you said, it sounds like I'm just being too hard on myself. I wish I didn't see all my flaws, but it's hard for me to see what other people see. I'm glad I picked the looser yellow shirt--especially after that sandwich I ate today! ;)

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The lumps and bumps

This will be the last you read about my damn marathon outfit, I promise! I went to Dunham's today to return the wrong-size capris, and while I was there, I searched for another outfit. I found a yellow shirt to possibly wear with my yellow slash capris, so I picked that up to try on. I also picked out a light turquoise shirt and capris to match (although they weren't as cute as the slash capris).

Some of you mentioned that you don't see how I could have "lumps and bumps", so I will show you a picture of what I'm talking about. This takes a lot of courage to post, so please be nice! I will show you comparisons of shirts. These are all the same brand (Under Armour), but different sizes and fits...

Cringe! These are the lumps and bumps I was talking about.

Way too see-through! You can see my belly button.

This is the one I'm going to wear. It's not to tight, not too loose, and it matches my capris!

Despite the fact that the yellow is kind of see-through, I'm going to wear the semi-fitted yellow shirt with the yellow slash capris. Please don't tell me it's the wrong choice, because I'm so sick of thinking about this stupid outfit! I'm going to have my waist-pack (water bottle thing) on, so my stomach won't even be too visible regardless.

See what I mean, by clothes hiding a lot of flaws? Since I just had a lower body lift, my upper body still has a lot of excess skin. My arms are the worst, but also under my arms, and even my upper back. It's not "fat", you can see bulges from my loose skin. I'm not too worried about it. The stomach REALLY bothered me (obviously, because I had the skin removed); but the upper body is just normal annoyances, I think. I just have to take care when picking out clothes.

So I finally got that taken care of. I just took the shirt to a place about 30 minutes away to have my blog address printed on the back, as well as my name printed on the front... they told me it would take 3 days. I was really bummed! So I won't have that stuff on there, but at this point, I really don't care. I just want to be done thinking about the clothes.

Jessica and I had our LAST training run today!! It was a 2-miler... and no, that's not a typo. Two miles. We actually met at a frozen custard shop and ran one mile out and then back. We did our fastest pace to date, I'm sure... a 9:29/mi pace.

I kept telling Jessica we were going too fast, and she better not pull that shit on Sunday, or she'll be running alone. It barely felt like we even started our run before we had to turn around. We finished and ordered frozen yogurt, of course! They had strawberry and chocolate, so I ordered a twist of the two. Jessica just ordered the strawberry.

Supposedly, the 4-oz serving of frozen yogurt was only 70 calories! I should go there more often. That was totally worth 70 calories.

Tomorrow morning, Jerry, me, and the boys are leaving for Cleveland. We're probably going to go to the zoo and maybe the science center tomorrow. Jessica isn't leaving for Cleveland until Saturday, so I'll meet up with her then. Renee and Andrea are going as well, and they will be our cheerleaders on Sunday. I am SO excited that they are going to be there! They've both run marathons before, so they know how big of a deal this is to Jessica and me.

I'm going to bring my computer with me, to hopefully write a blog at the hotel on Friday and Saturday, but I don't know for sure if I'll have internet access. If not, you'll probably get a race report on Sunday night--if I survive, that is! ;)

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High-maintenance

I (finally) got my Under Armour shipment today. Remember how I was looking for the "slash" capris for my marathon? I couldn't find any in stock at any of the stores around here (I tried two Dunham's, and three Dick's), so I had to order them online. I also ordered a yellow top to match.

This is the back of the outfit

I love the capris! They are super cute and comfy. But I can't wear the top :(  It's the perfect match as far as the yellow goes; but I don't have the body to wear a very light-colored top like that. You can see my lumps and bumps and it makes me feel self-conscious. Since it is a "fitted" shirt (which runs smaller than the other UA shirts I have), I ordered a medium. But even a medium fits pretty snugly. It would be fine if it was black, but with a see-through color like yellow, I don't want it to be snug. I wish that I had been able to order the blue or green, but they were out of stock even on the website.

After I tried the yellow stuff on, I decided to go to our local Dunham's and see what I could find there. They actually had the slash capris in stock! They had the orange color and the gray color. They had one size small left of the orange, so I bought them. I found a matching shirt, and got that too. I will just return the yellow items online.

When I got home and tried them on, the capris felt a little loose going on. I looked at the tag, and they said medium--they were on the wrong fucking hanger at the store. I could probably get by with them, but I don't want to have to keep tugging on the back of them, pulling them up if they droop. So tomorrow I will go back to Dunham's to return them. If they have the gray ones in my size, I might get those. I really do like them! I just wanted to buy a complete outfit.

Now I'm clueless as to what I'll wear for the marathon. I might just wear my go-to outfit of my black UA capris and top, and throw a sparkle skirt over it. Or maybe I'll dig out that purple shirt I made with my name on the front, and have never worn.

I have NEVER been "that girl", who frets over what to wear--particularly when I run! I'm always mismatched, wearing whatever is most comfortable. But for my first and only marathon, I wanted to have a cute outfit for pictures. I just shouldn't have waited until the last two weeks to figure it out.

(Speaking of Under Armour, the UA giveaway for the $500 gift card ends on the 21st, so if you haven't yet entered, you can do so on this post.)

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I've had a bad couple of days with my eating. I've been feeling stressed out and a little depressed, and I've used food to make me feel better. I'm glad that I at least recognize that, and I'm not making excuses. It's just hard to stop! I've been eating two large bowls of cereal as a snack. I never used to be a cereal person when I was overweight; but now, I could go through an entire box of cereal in one day. I don't want it to turn into one of the things I can't keep in the house, so I really need to watch it.

I'm a little nervous about going to Cleveland--not just for the marathon, but because of the food. I always gain weight on trips (even 10 pounds in a weekend), and I don't want that to have a big effect on my race performance. My plan is to eat intuitively, focusing on carbs, with as little grease as possible. Not much fiber, either. I don't want any tummy issues on race day! We have reservations at Buca di Beppo for Saturday night--so I will carb load, but not too much. The only good thing about being so nervous is that I probably won't have much of an appetite.

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We're coming home immediately after the race on Sunday, which is probably for the best. I'm not expecting to feel like walking around the city doing touristy stuff! ;)  Jerry and I have been to Cleveland a few times, and we really liked it. That's why I was excited to do the Cleveland marathon. Gosh, I can't wait until Monday! ;)

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Drowning in sweat

The temperature in Cleveland for the marathon on Sunday just keeps climbing...

I know, I know, some of you think it's funny that I consider 80 degrees to be hot. But Michigan 80 and, say, Arizona 80, are totally different. When I was in Arizona last year, it was 110 degrees--and it felt more like 90 degrees to me. Michigan is VERY humid, so 80 will make me drown in sweat.

I ran four miles today and it was 73 degrees--I was drenched in sweat after just 2 miles. I know that worrying about the weather isn't going to change anything, so I will try to just let it be. I just hope that over the next 5 days, the forecast will come down to about 46 degrees and overcast. That's not asking too much, is it?! ;)

I forgot just how terrifying it can be to run in the springtime. Last year, I was attacked by a blackbird! It was the scariest moment I've ever experienced while running, and that includes being hit by a car and being bitten by 3 different dogs (not all at the same time, fortunately). The birds must get really protective of their babies, because they pitch a big fit at me while I run.

I had forgotten about it until today, when I ran onto the peninsula and the birds started making all kinds of noises and one swooped down very close to my head. I have no idea what a pissed off bird looks like, but these birds definitely looked pissed. I spent the next two miles jumping at every tweet I heard. I remember watching the movie The Birds when I was kid, and my parents talked about how scary it was when they first saw it. I kept thinking it was dumb, and not scary at all--they were just BIRDS, after all. But now I know just how scary birds can be!

I tried to take it easy on my run today, to save up my energy for the weekend. It wasn't too hard to hold a slower pace since I was constantly looking over my shoulder head for angry birds. I was glad I put sunscreen on before I ran, because I would have been burnt badly if I hadn't--there weren't any clouds today. My skin is so pale that I burn after just 10 minutes in the sun. Ever since I visited my friend Sarah in the hospital, I've been religious about wearing sunscreen, however.

Just FYI, starting tomorrow, I think I am going to start writing my blog posts later, and having them go live at 9 pm EST instead of 5 pm--not that you're all on the edge of your computer seat, waiting for my blog posts or anything! ;)  Since summer is right around the corner, the days will be longer, and I'm going to be spending more time outside--especially in the evenings. My very favorite part of summer is sitting on the back deck with Jerry, drinking a cold beer, and watching the kids play outside. What's your favorite part about summer?

What a whiny post today! Anyone else feel like letting it out and being a crybaby? Go ahead! ;)

(Oh, and for those of you that were curious how Jerry and I met... you can read about that here. Not super interesting, unfortunately!)

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Six days out

Marathon week begins...

I'm sure you are probably just as sick of reading about the marathon as I am of thinking about it. I wish I was excited, but I'm just super nervous. I will just be so happy when it's all over! Jerry, the kids, and I are going down to Cleveland on Friday morning. The marathon isn't until Sunday, so we'll spend some time doing fun things with the kids on Friday and Saturday. Jessica is staying in a hotel with our friends Andrea and Renee, who are coming to cheer us on (how awesome is that?!)

I had a three mile run on the schedule today, so I did that as soon as the boys were on the bus. The whole time I was running, I was thinking about how hard it's going to be to run 26.2 miles on Sunday--and I'm having serious doubts about the whole thing. I did the training, but I just don't feel ready. I guess I won't know for sure until Sunday!

After my run this morning, I showered and got ready for my colposcopy appointment that I've been dreading. I had to go into the procedure room, which I've never had to do before. I took some Motrin before I left home, so I was hoping for a painless procedure.

The whole thing felt a lot like a pap smear, only it took longer (and was more uncomfortable--I don't want to say "less comfortable" because a pap smear isn't exactly comfortable!). She had to put vinegar on my cervix, then look at it under some high-powered microscope. Then she had to take a couple of tissue samples (which was extremely uncomfortable, but not very painful). And the worst part was actually afterward, when she had to apply pressure (to stop the bleeding from where she took the tissue sample). I was just clenching my teeth with my eyes squeezed shut waiting for it to be over. It was such a weird feeling. Then it was done, and there was no pain or anything afterward.

After I left the OB/GYN, I went to Dick's and returned that Nathan's hand held water bottle; then I went to Victoria's Secret to get another free pair of panties. I love that they are sending me coupons for free panties! I have no idea how I got on that mailing list, but it's one mailing list that I don't mind being on. While I was there, I browsed around so I wouldn't look like I was just there for the free panties, and naturally, I ended up buying something black and very lacy. Hahaha, I felt right into that trap!

Del, my friend (and ex-boss from when I worked at Curves) called me this afternoon. She was wondering if I might want to work at Curves again! I talked to her about the hours and all that, but I couldn't commit to it, because I wouldn't have anyone to watch my kids on a routine basis. So I ended up telling her that she could use me as a contingent employee. She'll call me when she needs someone, and if I can work it out, I'll go in and work. Working at Curves was a really fun job, and I would love to go back in there occasionally!

I just realized that today is the anniversary of when I met Jerry...

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Reader Questions & Answers #13

On Sundays, I will answer some readers' questions in a post. If you have a question that you would like me to answer here on the blog, just send me an e-mail with the subject "Q&A", and I may include them in a future Q&A post. They don't have to be about weight loss or running--anything is game!  (Remember, I'm not a doctor or dietician, or any sort of medical professional--I can only answer questions from my own experience).

Q. How did you determine your calorie needs in the beginning?  Did you start with WW and later move to calorie counting? I read in one of your FAQ posts that you didn't start exercising until you were well into your weight loss. I'm already exercising 3-4 days per week. When you started exercising what did that do to your tracking? Me and WW recently broke up so I'm trying to determine how to count calories and activity without their tracker.

A. When I started losing weight in August 2009, I started by counting Weight Watchers Points. I didn't join WW, attend meetings, or use their online program... I just used a paper journal and counted Points from the materials I had at home (previous WW attempts). I wasn't exercising at all at that time.

As I lost weight, the number of Points I was allowed to eat kept dropping. I started to feel like I was starving all the time! I decided to track my calories for a week and see how many calories I was getting from the amount of Points I was allowed. I discovered that I was getting only 1,000-1,200 calories per day! No wonder I felt like I was starving. So I decided to switch over to counting calories alone, and to track them on SparkPeople.com. SparkPeople recommended 1,200-1,550 calories per day, and I tried that for a couple of weeks. I still felt hungry, so I increased my baseline calories (see below) to around 1,600 per day, and was still able to lose weight.

750 calories, and one of my favorite "earned" treats

The number that I aim for each day is what I call my "baseline" calories. That is what I aim to eat when I am not running that day. When I started exercising (after I had lost about 60 pounds), I added half of those calories burned each day to my baseline. So, for example, if I run six miles and burn 600 calories, I would add 300 calories to my baseline of 1,600... making my total 1,900 for the day. Does that make sense?

The only exception I made to this was on my long run days. I chose to allow myself to use ALL the calories earned on my long runs on a special treat--a frosted cookie from Mrs. Fields, ice cream from Maggie Moo's, a big piece of cake, etc. I only do one "long run" per week, so it gave me something to look forward to, rather than dread.

So, to answer your question, there is no right way to determine your calorie needs in the beginning. I had to experiment to find out what worked for me. I knew 1,200 was not enough, and I was NOT happy getting that few calories, so I made up my own "rule". I would start high and see if you lose weight that week, and if not, then lower it a little and try again. Obviously, you want to be able to eat as many calories as possible and still lose weight--so it just takes some experimenting to find out what works for you.

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Q. I know you are training for a marathon and running is the only exercise you do now.  But have you ever thought about anything else for exercise?  Like different classes--Zumba (I love), body pump, spinning, or boot camp. Or if you can't go to classes what about different DVD's? I just wanted to know do you ever change it up.

A. The short answer to this is no. Before losing weight, I never enjoyed exercise--period. I started walking in order to train to walk the half-marathon in Indy. And then I started running only to run a 5K race for my bucket list. I never, ever expected to "become a runner"--I thought I would run that one race and never run another step again.

But somewhere along the way, I really began to develop this love/hate relationship with running, and I got hooked! I love constantly trying to improve my distances and times. I love only competing with MYSELF, and nobody else. I love that it's a solo sport, for the most part--there aren't people watching me, and I don't have to see all my loose skin jiggling in mirrors at a gym. I love how efficient it is--I burn a heck of a lot of calories in just 30 minutes of running.

I've tried a couple of classes with Jessica, and I was horribly uncomfortable the entire time. I'm very uncoordinated and awkward. I think that's another reason I like to run--it just feels like a natural movement to me. I don't have memorize moves and follow instructions. I tried DVD's many times, and just grew frustrated.

I guess I actually LIKE the monotony of running. Since I don't have to think about the movement, my head is clear to think about other things--sometimes I pray, sometimes I plan out what I'm going to make for dinner, sometimes I imagine reaching goals (like crossing the finish line at the marathon). I can see why some people would find running boring when you do it day after day, but I thrive on the "boringness" ;)

I am NOT trying to say there is anything wrong with doing classes or DVD's, however. I think that everyone should do what they enjoy, and if you enjoy your classes, that's great!

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Q. I'm an avid follower of your blog and love the fact that you have about as much enthusiasm toward dreadmill running as I do--however we both know that there are times when it's a necessity. What I'm wondering is whether you have any set dreadmill workout plans that you work from? Do you get them off the net? Make them up yourself? Or do you just see what you fancy on the day? I'd love your thoughts on this as I'm constantly looking for something - anything - to make the dreadmill just that little bit more interesting.

A. Yes, running in place for miles on end is completely boring! When I use the treadmill, it is only out of necessity--when I don't have anyone to watch the kids, or when it's too hot to run outside. I will run in snow and freezing temps, but during the summer, I just can't stand running in the heat. So usually, I will just do what I need to do and get it done. But there are ways of making it go by faster...

I've found that the most enjoyable (least dreadful?) way to do the treadmill is to change something every minute. I might start at 6.0 mph, and then after 1 minute, bump it up to 7.0, then after a minute of that, go down to 5.5, etc. Here are a couple of my favorite treadmill workouts--I've included a run, a walk, and a run/walk for variety (feel free to change the speed settings to whatever numbers are appropriate for you).

This is the run, and at those speeds will total about 5K

 Hopefully that will help prevent boredom! I created these on Excel, so you can make up your own workouts however you'd like.

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And now a question for all of you...

What did you have for breakfast this morning?

Noah asked me if he could make me breakfast. He made me a scrambled egg and toast with butter and grape jelly. I thought it was cute that he asked--my kids don't normally acknowledge Mother's Day! Maybe he's old enough now that he understand it ;)

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