Checking In

After my last post, I was so sure that I was going to get back to writing regularly (not daily, but at least a couple of times a week). The more time that passes, though, the more overwhelming it feels. To keep things simple on this post, I think I'll just write bullets--short tidbits of what's been going on lately. I've actually really missed writing!

**Eli bought a new (used) car. And when I say used, I mean a Dodge Neon! They quit making those in the early 2000's, I think. I actually had a 1995 Dodge Neon when I was in college and I loved it. Eli has gotten really into cars, like Noah, and he chose this one because of the "mods" (I don't understand anything about cars--they don't interest me at all).

It's so interesting, though, that both Noah and Eli have met people due to their cars. On more then a couple of occasions, car enthusiasts have pulled into parking lots behind them to ask about their cars. I never knew it, but there is a whole community like this--my kids have even gone to car "meet-ups". Anyway, I have taken over Eli's Volvo--it's a 2008 and has 317,000 miles on it! Hopefully it lasts until interest rates on cars go down, but I'll drive it until it's dead. It has a CD player and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't excited about playing some old CD's from high school. I have no idea why I held onto them, but I'm glad I did!

**My weight is up about five pounds. Honestly, I feel lucky that it's not more! I know my biggest problem is snacking in the evenings. I don't know why it's so hard to get it under control. If I can just quit snacking before bed, I know that it would make a big difference in my weight. All I can do is keep trying, I guess!

**One of the reasons I was hesitant to write is because of a comment that someone left on my last post (I didn't publish it). This person has been hate-reading my blog for probably 10+ years, and I was kind of creeped out that she mentioned something very specific regarding my kids. There are a few things that I've always kept private from my blog, usually for safety reasons. (For example, the name of my kids' schools... yes, someone could get that info if they really wanted to, but I didn't want it to be easily accessible on my blog.)

Seeing something that specific in the comment, something that I'd deliberately left out of the blog, was kind of creepy. I was used to the degrading comments (she loves to make me feel bad about everything--my terrible parenting, being a bad wife, being a lazy stay-at-home mom, doing projects all wrong and making them look like crap, my food looking disgusting, my house being ugly, you name it!); but this was new. I've been valuing privacy more and more lately (with cameras *everywhere* now, I hate feeling watched all the time). So, the fact that this person looked up this info about my family was disturbing. Anyway, I don't understand why people hate-read; my time means too much to me to waste it in such a negative way.

**My Asian pear tree has fruit growing on it!!! I only planted it in the fall and I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw actual fruit there. I'd waited probably 10+ years for the other "Asian pear tree" to grow fruit, only to learn that the tree was just an invasive species of tree that would never bear fruit. Hopefully I'll get to eat a few Asian pears from the tree this fall!

**Jerry and I were scrolling through Instagram one day when we saw the "old man challenge"--you have to stand on one foot and put on your sock and shoe (while keeping balance and not lowering your foot or holding onto anything), then switch legs and put on the other sock and shoe. We tried it and had fun doing it, so we looked up some more challenges. There was one that I thought was ridiculously impossible but we tried it out for a laugh. And we discovered it actually wasn't that bad--it looks so much harder than it is! This is just a screenshot from a video right before we crashed to the floor.

Date night shenanigans

Ideally, both people would be able to balance horizontally. We never fully got the balance to the point where we could hold the position for a long time, but we realized later that the person on top has to stay flat (this is hard to describe--if you look at the picture, Jerry should be lying back more, which helps control the balance). Anyway, we laughed so hard and we have some funny videos of us toppling over. 

We also did a challenge to see who could draw the best circle without looking. Mine is the white one and Jerry's is the red one. Basically, you stand with your shoulder close to the wall, looking straight ahead so you can't see the board. Then you use your arm to make a big circle and see how close the start and end are to touching. Mine was really good! Jerry's needed some work, haha.

Luke and Riley came over and I had them try it, too. Luke was so funny. Luke's was off about an inch at first, so he switched to his left hand and it was near perfect. He's the only person I know that is truly ambidextrous--sometimes he writes with his right hand, sometimes with his left, whatever he's in the mood for. Same with things like throwing a ball, and even playing Jenga.

**While Luke and Riley were here, I played Tapple with them--it's the game I wrote about before, where there is a category and you have to take turns calling off things that are in that category, beginning with a unique letter each time, until all the letters are used or someone can't think of one before the timer goes off (you get 10 seconds each). The category was "things found in a house" and we went through things like couch, table, dresser, pets, etc. There were only a few letters left, and "i" was one of them. Riley said, "Inhabitants!" I was stunned and couldn't help laughing. She's only five! That was impressive.

**When Jerry and I went to Minnesota, we spent a lot of time at Becky's parents' house. Becky's mom is a very talented quilter (she's the one that quilted my race t-shirt quilt top). Since I love sewing, I was fascinated with her sewing room and all of her quilts. This one blew my mind--she pieced the entire thing BY HAND with a needle and thread! She told me how many pieces there are, but I can't remember.

The hexagons are incredibly tiny, and she had to do a lot of "fussy cuts"--which basically means that rather than cutting fabric in any which direction, she chose to cut the hexagons out with the fabric's polka dots in the center and the stripes going in particular directions. I wish I had the patience to quilt, but I prefer smaller projects (likely because I am an instant gratification person, ha).

**Remember when I took that 23&Me test in December? I did it solely for the medical part, but toward the end of January, I decided to look at the ancestry part of it. I thought it would be incredibly boring, but I discovered something kind of unbelievable. I wish I could go into details, but I have to keep this kind of vague. I saw someone who was listed as a first cousin (sharing a set of grandparents with me) and I didn't recognize the name. I asked my parents and they didn't know, either. (Each of my parents has five siblings, so there were a lot of possibilities.)

I contacted this cousin (I'll call them a gender-neutral "Sam") and discovered they were adopted right after birth. They didn't know who their biological parents were due to a closed adoption, but they had a little info from the adoption agency. Based on this, I was able to figure out who Sam's bio parent is. Sam had been looking for this info for decades! The bio parent is choosing to remain anonymous and because of the closed adoption, Sam is respecting their wishes. I really hope that someday this will change, but for now, all I can do is get to know my cousin--and chatting with them has been great! We hope to meet up later this year.

**We bought some more luxury vinyl planking, and are going to put it in the bedrooms--Eli's room and my craft room still have carpet, which desperately needs to be replaced, so we are excited about this project. I'm hoping Jerry will get it installed it next weekend. While I did most of the work in the house remodel, Jerry did the floors and I'm happy not to have to do them! I am definitely going to paint the craft room, though. Maybe I'll do that this weekend, actually.

I'm going to end this post now. I know I have more to write--I really need to keep a list--so hopefully I will write another post soon! Thanks for the love and the checking in on me. I really do appreciate it, more than I can express.

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Self-Care

I think that was the longest break I've taken from blogging in, oh, 13 years? Yikes!

I should have checked in at some point, because I felt guilty about the abrupt absence, but I didn't realize just how much I needed that break until after our Minnesota trip. I loved getting to see Becky (and the kiddos, of course!). There is so much to catch up on--some things I'll probably post about over the next couple of weeks, but some things are pretty irrelevant now, so I'll pick and choose what to write about.

(Also, I have a million photos to sort through, so I'll just include a couple of random ones in this post)

Look how grown up Luke is! He drove me around the property on a golf cart. He's also a faster reader than I, haha--I bought him a Captain Underpants book and he read the whole book on a Sunday morning. Meanwhile, I spent 24 hours in the car (roundtrip) and I finished one book.

We've had SO many big changes in our household recently. Noah moved out in December (taking Phoebe with him), Jerry started an entirely new work schedule, Eli graduated high school, and both Noah and Eli took jobs where Jerry works. I didn't love the idea of the kids working at the plant (I want them to do something they truly enjoy) but they were very enticed by the pay and benefits.

Eli plans to stay there a year, saving up as much money as possible before he (hopes) to start an electrical apprenticeship. Noah still isn't sure what he wants to study; he's changed his program three or four times. Rather than continuing to spend money on school, he wants to work full time until he figures it out. Regardless of what they choose to do, I'm cool with it. They both actually really like working at the plant for now!

I still don't have a car, but I'm okay with that. I'd rather put off my errands and things for the evenings and weekends than take out a loan for a car right now. Also, Eli is hoping to buy a new (used) car soon; when he does that, I'm going to drive the Volvo. Definitely different from my Jeep, but our luck with cars over the last year makes me reluctant to get a new one.

Aside from all those changes, the main reason for taking time off was basically for self-care. After The Worst Year Of Our Lives (I'm not sure what else to call it, so that's how Jerry and I have been referring to all the crap we went through), we both felt kind of broken. It's been about two years since our long streak of bad luck started and I'm definitely still dealing with a lot of it (emotionally).

I recently learned who I can and cannot count on to be here for me in tough times, and that was really hard to accept. I let some people down by dealing with my own stuff and neglecting those relationships (not purposely; I just felt so emotionally drained, like I had nothing left to give). And I just wasn't in the mindset to write a vulnerable post.

So, I spent the last month focusing on ME--something I haven't done in at least 18 years. It seemed like it was a good time because Eli had just graduated and it felt like a transition period for me, from "stay-at-home mom" to "homemaker". I did a lot of crafting (mostly sewing) and more introspection than ever before. Last week, I had an epiphany that years of therapy was never able to uncover--why I eat for emotional reasons--and that felt like a huge burden was lifted. I'm not ready to write about that yet, though.

Working on crafts has been very therapeutic and I'm starting to feel "lighter", if that makes sense. I'm hoping that I can move forward now (with life in general) and recharge my emotional batteries (that's a lame way to put it, but that's the best I can describe it).

Riley and I made bracelets for each other. She's so creative! We played doctor (I was the patient, of course) and she took an x-ray, said I had a broken arm, did surgery, put a cast on it, and gave me instructions to cover the cast in the shower for 10 months--BAHAHA. I also had my teeth worked on multiple times when we played dentist.

Aside from all that, things here are good. Jerry and I are solid, the kids are happy and "grown up" (very bittersweet for Jerry and me), the pets are doing great (Phoebe is SO happy at Noah's!), and we haven't had any mini-catastrophes in a while. I'd been pushing Jerry for years to find a hobby he enjoys but he couldn't think of anything that really interested him (other than disc golf, which he loves, but isn't convenient to do very frequently).

I made these for Jerry for Father's Day. I have loved Shrinky Dinks ever since I was a kid, and I originally made him a keychain of the ECTO-1 license plate (from Ghostbusters). Then I had the idea to transfer drawings the kids had done--pictures they drew OF JERRY when they were each four years old! As well as the way they wrote "daddy". Eli's says "Dae" because that is how he said it at the time--DAA--EEE, basically skipping over the DD--and he sounded it out. So cute! Jerry loves the keychains.

When we were in Minnesota we took Luke and Riley to the Mall of America, where they have a LEGO store. Even though Jerry had never gotten into Legos before (I know it's LEGO, but I just can't get used to NOT calling them Legos), it suddenly piqued his interest (I'm sure the Star Wars and Ghostbuster Lego sets had nothing to do with it--ha!). Then Eli gave him a LEGO set and suddenly he was hooked--and very excited that it could be a good hobby for him.

He spent most of the weekend working on it and then pulled out the thousands of Legos we have (about half of them are at least 40 years old!) and the instruction manuals for different sets, and now he wants to start putting those together. I had started sorting them a while ago, hoping to put the sets back together, but it was taking soooo long. I love building with Legos, but sorting them is no fun at all, haha. They are currently sorted by color, which is helpful.

I haven't done a weigh-in in a while, so I will get back to that on Wednesday. I don't have a great feeling about it, but I'm also not going to put pressure on myself. I feel like I've gotten a lot of emotional baggage out of the way and I will have an easier time focusing on my physical wellbeing. In fact, as soon as I finish this post, I'm going to run!

My friend Sarah (the one who lives in Arizona) is coming to visit this week and I couldn't be more excited to see her. She's been my best friend since we were toddlers, basically, and she's someone that I know will always be here for me. She understands me almost as much as Jerry does. We can go months without talking, but then we spend a couple of hours on the phone and pick up right where we left off. I haven't seen her in a very long time (I think almost two years) and I look forward to catching up in person!

Thank you for the comments and emails, truly. I appreciate the kindness more than you can ever know. I wasn't trying to ignore anyone, and I should have said I was taking a break--but I had no idea I was going to be away this long. It's kind of hard to jump back in, because where do I start? I'll just take it one day at a time, writing when I want to and not writing when I don't feel like I have much to say. Writing this post feels good :)

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Road Trip!

The hotel internet is super spotty, so I'm going to have to write more when I get home. But this week has been kind of crazy--Eli graduated on Wednesday and then Jerry and I decided (pretty last minute) to drive to Minnesota on Thursday! I really wanted to see Becky (and Luke and Riley, of course, but I hadn't seen Becky since March of last year). I missed her a lot!

Plane tickets were insanely expensive, especially considering we only have Thursday-Sunday before Jerry goes back to work Monday, so we decided to make the 12-hour drive out here. I'll write about our trip on Monday or Tuesday. This hotel has been... interesting. Haha!

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Friday Night Photos #138

Even though I don't have a ton of photos, I'm going to post what I have (aside from "project" photos, which I do have full intentions of posting separately). I'll start with one project photo, however, because I *love* how it turned out. Remember my corduroy coat, the one I loved so much that I wound up with three different sizes? When I had gained quite a bit of weight, the coat wouldn't fit me anymore (it was a medium that fit on the small side). Thanks to Poshmark, I found it in a large and extra-large.

I wore them for a season or two until I lost the weight and they'd been in a bag in the garage ever since. I love to make things out of old or unworn clothing, so I decided to turn the coat into a bag. I used the faux fur to make cat beds, and then used the corduroy for the bag. I also used a men's dress shirt for the lining (and outer pocket). I had never sewn piping before, so I decided to give it a try as well.

This is what the coat looked like before

And this is the bag I made from it!

Isn't it cute? Jerry totally fell in love with this one and I think it could be pulled off as a "man bag" to use as a carry-on. (Jerry got the position at work he was really wanting, and it will likely involve international travel).

Speaking of sewing, I now have a brand new sewing machine! To take full advantage of credit card cash back, we put literally *everything* on a credit card and then I pay it off a couple of times a month. We never carry a balance, but we get 1.5-5% cash back on everything (including the bills that I pay with the credit card). I've always thought of this as my "bonus" money for taking care of the finances and paying bills on time, etc. I let the cash back build up and then "buy" something that I really want, without feeling guilty. (I know I shouldn't feel guilty for buying myself something, but I think it's ingrained with being a mom.)

Anyway, I had a little over $1,000 in cash back waiting, and I decided to get a sewing machine. I did a lot with my old machine and it worked well; but because I've been sewing so much lately, I wanted a machine that would make it easier to go through multiple layers of denim and interfacing. I was torn between two opposite ends of the spectrum in regards to the machine I wanted--either a super basic "workhorse" straight-stitch machine, or a digital machine with embroidery and all the bells and whistles.

As you know, I like simplicity, especially with electronics. I decided to go for the basic workhorse machine. One of the things I *really* wanted was a large space between the needle and the machine; I hated always trying to squeeze projects in that space while sewing. It was really overwhelming, trying to choose a model.

After reading a million reviews, I ended up buying a Juki TL-2000qi. (I bought it from Ken's Sewing Center online and I would absolutely buy from them again--great customer service, some bonus accessories, *and* the lowest price.) The machine was "only" $700 (I put that in quotes because my budget was $1000, not because $700 is cheap! ha), so I bought some accessories to go with it (presser feet, throat plate).

Isn't it beautiful?! ;)  I almost cried the first time I used it because I could not believe the difference! It's like sharpening your kitchen knives--you know how you don't realize how dull they've gotten until you  sharpen them and you realize life is just better with sharp knives? Yeah, like that. It's like the difference between cutting an apple with a butter knife versus a sharp paring knife.

The table/cart that I have it on is nothing pretty, but I put that together one morning because I was worried that I was going to drop my sewing machine if I kept carrying it around. Several months ago, I'd bought a couple of table leaves from the Habitat for Humanity ReStore; they were were solid oak and I got the two of them for $5. So I ran them through the planer and glued them together to make the table top. Then I just made a frame with some 2x4's and castors for movability. It's not pretty, but it's perfect for my sewing machine!

Anyway, enough about that. I've been using it all the time and I love it. 

The craziest thing happened a few houses down from us, and our neighbors caught it on video. The dike on the street separates the marsh from the road, and it's pretty tall (and very steep, although it doesn't look like it in photos). Well, an intoxicated woman flew down the road in a truck, straight at the dike, and basically took out half the dike while she crashed into the marsh. (Did I mention she had three kids in the car? They were not seriously injured, thankfully.)

There are kids that play on the street there ALL THE TIME. Not to mention people walking dogs and riding bikes, etc. This happened at around 3:00 in the afternoon, so she's very lucky that she didn't hurt anyone else.

Noah and his girlfriend went to IKEA one day and she sent me this picture saying, "They have plant-based meatballs at IKEA!" I was so excited that they'd actually ordered them (Noah and Rose aren't vegan). They said they were "amazing"; I always feel happy when people enjoy vegan food. And especially when they are open enough to trying new things like that :)

Eli gave me the most beautiful flowers for Mother's Day. I've always said that I'm not a "flowers person"--I don't want anyone spending money on something that isn't going to last--but the fact that Eli even acknowledged Mother's Day all on his own made me feel good. And the flowers *are* very pretty!

Eli went "urban exploring" with his friends at an abandoned factory and said it was really cool, so he went back with Jerry and Noah. I'm too much of a "rule follower" and I chose not to go, but their pictures were really interesting. There were tons of personal items that were just left there when the place closed.

This is a tote that Ken's Sewing Center sent me for free with my machine--I didn't even know that they were sending it! It's a really nice tote on wheels. Chick and Duck like to be pushed around in it, hahaha.

Every time I finish a bag of some sort, the kittens like to get inside of it. It happens immediately. (This patchy bag was actually a sort of practice for the *real* patchy bag I wanted to make.)

These are a couple of photos I took before Eli's prom. I love this one! He and his friends were standing in between poses when Jerry said something about looking like a proposal was about to happen, and it was like they were totally on cue--one of his friends pretended to pull out a ring and propose to Eli while his other friend looked shocked and excited. They didn't even know I was taking this picture. So funny!

Kids these days have no idea what this is. Jerry and I had to explain!

With this one, I thought it would be fun to go for a Beatles cover-look, but when they said, "What's the Beatles?" I gave up immediately. HAHAHA

And this was taken by an *actual* photographer for Ava's prom ;) 

I will end with this stunning photo of Phoebe looking like a cat goddess. Noah's girlfriend sent this to me to show me Phoebe's new collar. (Phoebe is so quiet that it's easy to trip over her, so they got her a collar with a bell.) She's still doing great and I know she is happy there. I went over to cut her nails last week and I actually saw her eat a whole container of wet food!

And that's all I've got for now. Have a great weekend! xo

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Three Things Thursday: Deep Thoughts

I used to enjoy writing the Three Things Thursday posts, so I don't know why I stopped doing them. When I was a kid, my older brother had a book called "Deep Thoughts" (as well as the sequels "Deeper Thoughts" and "Deepest Thoughts") by Jack Handy. They were kind of like coffee table books--a random (often very funny) thought on each page. Just a few sentences and nothing profound; just a tidbit of something that is usually relatable.

When Twitter became a thing, I started seeing screenshots of tweets pop up everywhere, and many of them looked like something from a Deep Thoughts book! Here are a few that made me laugh. And then I'll include a few random ones of my own as...

This guy, @simoncholland, is HILARIOUS. I follow on Instagram (his posts are just screenshots of his tweets, like this one).

Does anybody?! I'm genuinely curious.

When I was deleting everything from Facebook recently, I saved a lot of my old "status updates". I mostly wrote funny things that my kids said or did and I stopped writing them years ago, but there were some fun ones that I found. Here are three that made me smile...

Listen, if you ignore the hairstyles, the 1990's was the greatest decade ever.

Noah was 11 years old at the time.

(Eli is right-handed)

And a fourth, because it was hard to narrow it down to just three! ...

Back then, friends used to tell me that I should write a book about the funny things my kids say/do; while I don't think they are book-worthy, I'm so glad I wrote these sorts of things down. I wish I'd have continued these posts through the years--they are so fun to look back on. Kids are so funny when you take the time to really listen to them! I wish I'd written down more of their teenage things, because I most certainly wasn't ready for *that* ;)

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Wednesday Weigh-In: Week 186

You know how when you haven't done something in a really long time, it just gets either more difficult or more awkward the longer you wait? Yeah, that's how I feel about writing today. It's been so long that it feels both difficult AND awkward.

I'm not sure what to say, really! Everything has been pretty much the same around here, more or less. A year ago, I was still going through one of the worst times of my life, so I am very glad that life has been uneventful, for the most part. I thought I'd moved past it, but that year and a half of my life changed me a LOT inside and I've been struggling with that. (Also looking for the right therapist)

Anyway, the current uneventfulness doesn't leave much to write. I chose to write a weigh-in post today mainly because of the writing prompt! I think it's been three weeks or so since my last weigh-in, and unfortunately (or, perhaps, fortunately), nothing has changed. Without looking back, I think my weight was at around 145 last time and that's about what it was today:

I still haven't made any significant changes to my diet/exercise, so I wasn't expecting to have lost anything. I haven't been actively working on creating new habits or breaking bad ones. It's hard to admit to myself when I know that I have what it takes and I know what I need to do in order to reach my goals; I just don't have the drive to do it. I tell myself that if I want something badly enough, I'll do what it takes. Even though I very badly want to get back down to a comfortable weight, it's clearly not enough to make me do the work.

I feel like I'm approaching one of those defining moments I get occasionally. I get to the point where I'm finally ready to make a change and then I go ahead, full throttle, definitely a bit overzealous. That's kind of how I've always done things, haha. Ideally, I'd find a comfortable middle ground.

I haven't really set goals in a long time and I miss that drive I used to get when I was focused on meeting a goal. I'm torn between wanting to strive for some goals and wanting to just go with the flow. Yesterday, when putting on some of my "warmer weather" clothes, I realized that I either need to set some goals or buy a new (larger) wardrobe, hahaha. My weight is up about 10 pounds from last year and that means a whole clothing size. I don't have "back up" clothes anymore. So, I need to make a choice. And I'm going to set some goals--defined and measurable ones, like the days when I felt almost unstoppable.

The two things that are most important to me (physically) right now are losing 10-15 pounds and exercising regularly. Since those are very broad, I have to break them down. And to be honest, I haven't done that yet. I already know *what* I need to do; I mainly need to figure out a motivator or some sort of drive that makes my goals feel like a priority.

I didn't intend for this post to sound negative. I really need to write more frequently so that my thoughts are more organized. I never realized that the daily (or even near-daily) blogging helped in that way. I keep telling myself that I need to do a "catch-up" post, so I'll do that no later than Sunday (if I don't give myself a deadline, I may not do it).

For now, I'm going to sit down and write out some goals, as well as plans/habits for reaching them. Maybe that will be the motivation I need to get started. Let's hope so! ;)

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Saturday Morning Photos

These were meant to be Friday Night Photos--a week ago!--but better late than never. Most of the photos I have on my phone are of recent projects I've worked on. I'll put those in a separate post though. I've been really into sewing lately, and it's been so cold outside (we had frost on the ground yesterday!) that I haven't been motivated to work on outdoor things. I *need* to clean the garage; during the winter, we just toss things in there to put away in the spring.

It's been an emotional week. Last weekend, just a few miles from me, a woman was driving drunk at about 3:00 in the afternoon and drove her car right into the side of a boat clubhouse. Where there was CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY happening. She hit and injured 15 people and two kids died--siblings, ages 4 and 8 years. An older sibling and mom are still hospitalized and there was a candlelight vigil at the boat club last night.

Doesn't that just rip your heart into pieces? I have ZERO sympathy for that woman and I hope she rots in prison (she is currently out on $1.5 million bond). She has taken no responsibility and has shown no remorse. She was going so fast through the parking lot that she went 25 feet INTO THE BUILDING before her car stopped. And that was after she'd hit a parked car shortly beforehand. I am simply devastated for those kids and families that not only were injured, but there to witness it! There is no coming back from that kind of trauma. 

Okay, I've thought about it so much this week that I need to move on for now. It's horrific and I can't stop thinking about that poor mom who lost two of her kids and now has a huge recovery ahead--both her and her 11-year old son had severe injuries.

I thought I had a lot more photos than this, but that's probably because of all the photos I took for the baseball team. Speaking of baseball, Eli decided to leave the team. He'd been playing baseball since he was three years old! However, the varsity coach kind of sucked all the fun out of the game for him (and several other kids) and he decided he'd rather spend the time at work to save up for a car. Eli said it had been on his mind non-stop and he put a lot of thought into whether he wanted to continue playing; once he made the decision and told his coach, he said it felt like a huge relief. He seems happier and his mood is so much better! I didn't realize how much it had been affecting him.

Anyway, here are a few photos that have been hanging out on my camera roll...

When Luke and Riley were at Brian's one weekend, we went over there to see them. They have this play equipment that hangs in a doorway (a swing and these rings below). I was trying to describe to Riley how she could probably do a backflip with the rings and I wasn't doing a very good job explaining... so I decided to demonstrate for her, hahaha. I hadn't tried it since I was a kid, and I had no idea if I was going to fall and break my back, but I managed to do it. And it was so fun! Riley took this picture of me while I was hanging upside down.

The kids were leaving the following day for Texas (just a short trip with Brian) so there wasn't time for me to take them to Barnes & Noble for Luke's birthday tradition. I am going to take him the next time they are here, but in the meantime, I had gotten him a book that I was planning to buy since before he was ever even conceived. It's a book by Dr. Seuss called "My Book About Me" (Amazon affiliate link), and it's a fill-in-the-blank book for kids to fill in. My parents got one for each of my siblings and me, which we filled out when we were about six or seven years old. Luke just turned seven, so I thought it was a good time. (This is seriously a fantastic gift for a 5-7 year old! I still have the one I filled out. Maybe I'll dig it out and post some of it.)

Here, Luke was starting to fill out the book. I noticed he was writing with his left hand and I said, "Luke, I didn't know you were left-handed! Do you always write with that hand?" and he said, "No, I can write with both hands" and he switched to his right hand and continued. BAHAHA.

Meanwhile, Riley took each of us (Jerry, my mom, Brian, and me) upstairs individually to 1) style our hair, and 2) make us a name tag. I wish I had gotten a picture of my hair! She put a lot of spray-in conditioner in it and slicked it down on my head and put a bow on top. It was... not my usual look. Ha! Usually, when I tell the kids I have to leave, Riley jumps in my arms and asks me to stay longer. This time, I said, "Riley, we are going to have to head out in a few minutes" and she replied with zero hesitation, "You need to take out that bow!" The kids are SO funny; I wish they didn't grow so much between each visit.

Jerry and I went to Goodwill one day and we shopped around by ourselves before meeting up at the checkout area. I saw this Friends mug (what an awkwardly shaped mug!) and I knew I *had* to buy it for Jerry without him seeing it. I tucked it under some clothes in my cart and then totally forgot about it until we were at the checkout. It went something like this:

Jerry: "You got the mug!"

Me: "What do you mean?" (realizing then that I meant to hide it and forgot)

Jerry: "I was going to buy that Friends mug and hide it from you!"

Me: "That's what I was doing for you!"

So, we had each seen it and Jerry just left it on the shelf until he could go back for it without me seeing. When he went back, it was gone. Because it was in my cart, haha. I think I'm going to plant some cat grass in it.

Do you ever get the feeling you're being watched? ;)

Could Duck look any more evil?

Jerry was DYING to get his hands on one of these ghost trap popcorn buckets from the release of the new Ghostbusters movie. As soon as they were available, he drove to a theater about an hour away in order to buy one. Then he went back two more times to get the smaller sized ones to send to Luke and Riley. They sold out super fast, but he managed to get them.

Jerry, Eli, and I went to see Ghostbusters. Unlike Star Wars, I actually do like Ghostbusters (nothing like Jerry does, but I think it's a cute nostalgic movie). 

My dad asked if I'd make a pecan pie for Easter. I've made them a million times--my dad loves my pecan pies--but something SO ODD happened this time. I have no idea why, but it puffed up during baking(?!) and the texture was totally off. I am a self-admitted terrible baker, but I make a killer pecan pie; this was so strange! My dad said it still tasted good though.

I finally made something with the Friends fabric that I'd gotten. I had planned to make Jerry and I matching pajama pants, but I thought this would be more fun. These are backrest pillows and they're SO comfy. Jerry and I don't have a headboard, so they are nice for sitting up in bed (usually we just stack a bunch of pillows on top of each other). 

I've been on a really good sleep schedule (lights out at 9:00 pm) and it's been working out great, BUT I wake up way too early. I honestly think my body only wants six hours of sleep because it's practically impossible to sleep longer than that. So, I usually end up waking up at around 3:00 and I try to stay in bed until 4:00. So, I've started reading my Kindle before I even step foot out of bed.

Way back in the late 90's, I read a book called "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin De Becker (Amazon affiliate link) after seeing him discuss the book on Oprah. It was SO fascinating to me and I carried a lot of the into with me throughout the years. The book was partly the reason I chose psychology for my major in college. I don't know what prompted me to want to read it again, but I started it and was sucked in immediately. It's about listening to your intuition and how the tiniest details can predict someone's behavior. I highly recommend that everyone read this--especially women.

When Jerry and I were at Goodwill, I saw a pair of pants with this tag and I thought the tag was so cute! I've been saving some tags to put on a bag one of these days, so I've been paying more attention to them. I didn't want to buy these just for the tag, so I at least took a picture.

I made some serious progress putting my jeans quilt back together. I finished the quilt top and I love how it looks. However, I started quilting it and it looks terrible now. I am just not cut out to be a quilter! I thought the hardest part would be sewing through the thick layers but that wasn't a problem at all--I've sewn through much more than this before. However, the quilt top sort of bunches up while I'm sewing (even with a walking foot) and after reading about it, I think it's because the backing was too taut. So, it's going to look homely, but that's what I love so much about denim--I think it looks best when it's kind of messy. So this quilt is going to have character! ;) I'll post a pic when it's totally done.

When I was feeling sad after hearing about the drunk driver, I looked at a bunch of "eye bleach" memes (basically, really sweet and wholesome memes/quotes to make me smile). I really liked this little story:

I took this picture of Chick yesterday--he was SO out of it. He's so chill; the polar opposite of Duck, who has as much anxiety as I do. Peas in a pod, me and Duck.

Duck was digging through some things I have in my night table, and I grabbed my phone to take a video of him. As soon as I started it, he sensed I was there and then leapt toward me to check out my phone. It shows his "curious" look very well.

I found this neck tie at Goodwill and I loved it. I bought it in order to use the fabric on something--haven't decided what yet--because it was too unique not to. I love that a 13-year old boy designed it for the Save the Children Fund organization.

That's all I've got for now. Have a great weekend! xo

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Wednesday Weigh-In: Week 182

I figured I'd better do a weigh-in today, since it's been three weeks. Yikes! The time has been going by so fast and it feels hard to keep up. I've really been enjoying the time away from my blog, though. It hasn't really been for any reason other than my needing a mental break from it, and it's definitely helped.

I wish I could say that my weight has gone down a significant amount since my last weigh-in, but I definitely wasn't expecting it to. Nothing has changed as far as my diet goes (which isn't a good thing) and I want to create better habits. This month has been kind of crazy and I need to do a better job at handling changes to routine.

As far as today, I was at 145.2, which is down only a little from the 146 that I think I was at three weeks ago. Since my habits haven't changed, I can't expect my weight to ;)

The boys on Eli's baseball team asked if I would take pictures at their games again this year, and that made me feel good! So of course I agreed. It's a surprisingly big time commitment, though. I usually take about 250 photos during the game (I do a lot of bursts so that I can have fun action photos), and then I have to upload them to my computer so I can weed out the ones that didn't turn out or have multiple similar ones. (I usually narrow it down to about 100.) Then I try to make sure I have photos of each kid. And then I upload them to a shared album so the kids can download what they want. I really enjoy doing it for them, knowing that they are excited to have them.

Despite the changes in routine, I haven't been eating *too* terribly. I haven't had any sweets/desserts at all (and since I don't crave sugar right now, I'm not going to chance it for a cookie or something). I recently bought a cookbook called Vegan Asian by the blogger at The Foodie Takes Flight (Jeeca Uy). [I've been buying cookbooks over the last year or so rather than using recipe sites--there are just SO MANY ads on sites that it takes way too long to simply check out the ingredients in a recipe to decide if I even want to make it.] I'm glad I got this book because it's absolutely amazing. My favorite cookbook for sure. I've made several recipes and all have turned out delicious.

The only problem is that many ingredients aren't exactly healthy. There is a lot of sodium (mainly from soy sauce) and a lot of oil (for stir-frying). Also, I've been eating portions that are definitely bigger than they should be.

I'd like to get back to not eating after 7:00 pm (that is the biggest help when I want to lose weight, I've discovered), but it's nearly impossible with Eli's baseball schedule. His games are usually at 4:00 (sometimes as far as 45 minutes away) and a lot of them are double headers. So we don't get home until 8:30 or 9:00!

As far as exercise, I haven't been doing my morning runs anymore and I would really like to start them again. The reason I stopped was that I injured my knee in the stupidest way possible. I was cleaning out the garage and I was trying to remove a drawer from a small nightstand. I bought it at a garage sale ages ago with the plan to refinish it; but when I tried to sand off the paint, I discovered that it must be some sort of magic paint because it will NOT come off. I gave up.

Anyway, the drawer was stuck and I couldn't, for the life of me, get it to open and come out. (I had an idea of how to use the stand without the drawers and I wanted to try it.) I grabbed a hammer and started trying to hit the drawer outward--it was budging a tiny bit. After several hard hits, it was finally starting to come loose. I pulled back the hammer and swung really hard, thinking that final blow would get the drawer out.

Well, the hammer smashed right through the drawer's bottom (which was just thin plywood) and landed right on my goddamn kneecap! The pain was blinding and I couldn't even move. I was really worried that I shattered the bone--how could a direct blow from a hammer NOT?--but I wound up with a very deep bruise and a very painful knee. It hurt to even move my foot for about a week, which is when I stopped my morning runs.

I should have started right back up but so much time had passed and "one more day" wouldn't make a difference (story of my life). And now it's weeks later. Someone sent me a link to a challenge for a run streak in May, which is mental health awareness month. You can sign up (kind of like you would a race) and it's a virtual challenge to run (or walk) one mile a day for all of May.

I really like that idea! Since I'm passionate about mental health and I would like to get back to running, it seems to be a good fit for me. I haven't made the commitment yet, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to.

I met a friend at the Metropark on Sunday for a six-mile walk. She'd chosen the last place we walked so it was my turn to choose. I found myself feeling nostalgic for the path where I used to do a lot of my long runs with Jessica (and even by myself). It turned out to be a bad day for that particular park (it was flooded in a lot of areas because we've had so much rain) but seeing people out running on the path gave me a little pang of longing to do it too. I find it so inspiring--whether the person is very fit and fast or out of shape and slow, it inspires me all the same.

I know I've said this a few times now, but I'm going to make my goal for the week to be a couple of runs--not just around the block, but at least a couple of miles. If it's too hard, I'll take walk breaks, but I think I can manage a couple of miles if I run slowly enough ;) ALSO, I'm going to post a Friday Night Photos before my photos get out of hand!

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