Wednesday Weigh-In: Week 11

I sit here writing this in the dark with the hope that my laptop battery can hold out long enough for me to finish. We had a bad storm last night and lost power. When we lose power, it can take days for it to come back on, and I just really hope this isn't one of those times. I checked the electric company's website and it says that 99.98% of properties have power, so we are in the lucky 0.02% that does not.

I had another not-great week, unfortunately. Nothing bad happened, but I just haven't been sleeping well at all and I'm tired. I also didn't do a single run this week, and I'm super disappointed in myself for that. I'm finally able to run three miles, so I don't want to blow it and quit again.

I need to make a set schedule; I've been trying to do Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday each week, but I think I'm going to change that to Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. My excuses aren't even worthy--I wake up at 3:00 (lately, it's been more like 1:30 or 2:00 because I just can't sleep) and it doesn't get light until after 7:00. I don't feel safe running in the dark anymore (I don't know when/why that fear came about). So by then, I've already been awake for four hours and I'm usually in the middle of something by the time it's light outside.

Anyway, I had another loss on the scale this week. I was at 142.8, which is down from last week's 144.4. Since the power was out when I took the picture, this is what I got, haha:

I've definitely noticed that my body is softer than it was when I was at this weight last time. I'm sure that taking years off from running has had an effect, as well as general aging. My upper arms have SO much loose skin. I am seriously considering getting it removed, but I keep asking myself if it's really necessary. It wouldn't be just for cosmetic reasons (although that plays a part). It's very uncomfortable when wearing loose clothing (picture running without a sports bra and how your boobs just feel heavy and hindering). My armpits also make embarrassing fart noises sometimes when I reach overhead and then bring my arm down... seriously!

I have no idea how much it would cost and it just feels so impractical to spend money on something that isn't technically necessary. If the power comes back on before I post this, I'll try to get a picture so you can see I'm not exaggerating. A lot of times, people have said to me that I don't look like I have loose skin; but my upper arms and my thighs are pretty bad. I don't wear short sleeves or shorts because of it.

I'm not sure what else to write this week, but I found this picture I took a while ago of my breakfast so I figured I'd share that. I eat this every single morning, and I literally look forward to it every day--I love it! I just call it a "breakfast bowl", because it's no longer really cereal or oatmeal. I guess it's more like a muesli?

-Grapenuts
-rolled oats
-goji berries
-frozen blueberries
-ground flaxseed
-chia seeds
-unsweetened shredded coconut
-sliced almonds (unpictured, because I guess I forgot)
-unsweetened cocoa powder (did you know this has 2 grams of fiber and only 5 calories per tablespoon?!)
-unsweetened plain soy milk
-occasionally a dash of almond extract
-if I have a perfectly-ripe-for-me banana, I add that as well (but I'm super picky about bananas--they basically have to be barely-yellow without any specks of brown).

Without the banana, the bowl has about 520 calories and 20(!) grams of fiber. This is what it looks like all mixed together--once I add the soy milk, it looks pretty gross, so I'll spare you.

For some reason, uploading photos here has become extremely difficult. I'm too far removed from blogging to try to figure it out, though. On my last post, someone mentioned that it's difficult to leave a comment on my blog as well--and believe me, I know it! I have always had problems with it (half the time, I can't even leave comments myself), so I apologize for that. I tried switching to Wordpress once years ago and I became so frustrated that I just decided to stay with Blogger, as messy as it is. I have so many things that I should update on my blog, but it's overwhelming to even think about right now. As it is, I'm just impressed I've managed to stick with my weekly weigh-ins, haha.

Well, the power still isn't back on and I want to post this before my battery dies. So, I have no weekly mirror selfie. Maybe I'll update later!

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Wednesday Weigh-In: Week 10

That's little Duckling in the background. He loves to play with my hair ties in the mornings.

Yes, this is a day late. I have just had a long and emotionally draining week. Jerry is still having a tough time, but he went back to work on Tuesday. He was able to get in to see a therapist last Wednesday and he said it helped; he has another appointment soon. So, he's doing what he can and I think that time will help.

I don't really have much to say today because the week was very uneventful. It almost felt like a staycation with Jerry at home, only it wasn't much fun (considering the circumstances).

I managed to get in all three runs this week--including my first three miler in about three years!

Thursday- Jerry took Joey for a walk so I could sneak out and run by myself. I'm always relieved when I don't have to run with him, as terrible as that sounds. He loves to go, but it limits my routes (since he can only go about a mile) and I have to be careful about my pace so I don't wear him out. It's sad to think that he used to practically drag me on our runs!

Anyway, I was aiming for about 2.75 miles since I ran 2.5 miles the previous run. I didn't map out a route, I just guessed as I went and I was almost spot-on. I ran 2.72 miles; I could have run past my house to reach 2.75, but it didn't matter that much to me to hit that particular number. The run actually felt pretty good! The first two miles were pretty easy (relatively speaking). I struggled a little after that, but that was to be expected as I'm still a "beginner".

Overall, I finished 2.72 miles (12:08, 11:51, and 11:36, with overall average pace of 11:53/mi and an overall average heart rate of 155 bpm. I don't know why my heart rate got so high.

Sunday- Ran with Joey for the first mile. We looped my neighborhood (which is almost exactly one mile) and then I dropped him off and kept going. It was nice and cool outside, so it felt good. After I dropped him off, I ran a route that I knew to be about two miles. I felt nostalgic as I ran, because I haven't done that route in such a long time.

I knew I wanted to finish three miles (that's been my goal all along) and I focused on going slow (I thought I was going much slower than I was, actually, but I didn't look at my pace at all until I was done). Overall, I finished three miles (12:17 with Joey, 11:51 and 11:17; overall average pace of 11:48/mi with average heart rate of 153 bpm.

Tuesday- I headed out early, as soon as it was light outside. I had Joey with me, so I looped the neighborhood for the first mile and dropped him off at home. Then I decided on a loop that I knew was roughly two miles. Since I hit my three-mile goal, I'm no longer trying to add distance to each run. I'm happy with doing three three-mile runs each week. My main focus now is to stay consistent so that they just get easier. I'd love to be able to run at my MAF heart rate (136 bpm) but I'm nowhere near that. Maybe after I get used to doing some three-milers, I'll add intervals into one of my runs each week to build fitness.

Anyway, my legs felt very heavy and tired during this run for some reason. The weather was really nice and I'd expected it to feel easy. I ran as slowly as possible, hoping that it would feel easier. I overshot my three-mile route and did 3.10 miles--12:59 with Joey, 12:19, and 11:56 average paces per mile. Overall average of 12:22 and heart rate of 153 bpm. As soon as I finish this post, I'm going to go for a run and I just hope my legs feel stronger this time.

I had a disappointing week on the scale, but considering how well I've been doing thus far, I'm not worried about it. I did everything the same as I have been, so I don't think I could have changed anything for a larger loss.

I was at 144.8 last week, and this week I was at 144.4. I'm getting excited for the 130's!

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RECIPE: Asian Smashed Cucumber Salad

I have been absolutely obsessed with this Asian Smashed Cucumber Salad lately. Since I have a long gap between breakfast and dinner, but I'm not really hungry for lunch, I make this and eat it in between. It is ridiculously easy, fast, cheap, healthy, light, and refreshing, with just a handful of common ingredients. It's the perfect summer salad!

Why smashed cucumbers? I didn't really get it either, but apparently the vinaigrette can get into the nooks and crannies better. And smashing it is kind of fun!

Ingredients:

1 hothouse cucumber (the kind that comes in plastic wrap)
2 tsp. garlic, minced (or 2 tsp. "jarlic"--minced garlic in a jar--which is what I use)
1-1/2 tsp. sesame oil
1-1/2 Tbsp. rice vinegar
1 Tbsp. tamari or soy sauce
1/2 tsp. chili powder
1/2 tsp. sugar (I used pure maple syrup)
1-1/5 tsp. toasted sesame seeds

Directions: Cut off the ends of the cucumber (do not peel). Using the handle of your knife, smash along the whole length of the cucumber. It will break up into large pieces. Then use your knife to slice the pieces crosswise into chunks. Use a paper towel press out as much water as possible. Place in a bowl.

Combine the rest of the ingredients and pour over the cucumbers. Give it a stir to coat the cucumbers and then place it in the fridge to chill for about 10-15 minutes before eating.

Makes 1 serving. 151 calories, 5 grams protein, 13 grams carbs, 9.5 grams fat, 5 grams fiber

Here is a printer version. I don't have the fancy recipe plug-in like food bloggers use, so this is just a simple google drive pdf! (For some reason, I'm not able to view it on my browser; I hope that it works, and I apologize if not. I'll keep working on it.)

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Wednesday Weigh-In: Week 9

This has been a rough week. The arthritis in my back has been hurting really bad and it's been limiting as far as what I can do around the house. I absolutely hate that my back becomes an obstacle that I have to work around just to do typical activities. I try to get all of the important things done as early in the day as possible because the longer I'm on my feet, the more my back starts to hurt.

I only ran once this week. I think that sitting in front of the computer so long last Wednesday is what made my back pain flare up, so I decided to skip my next run and hopefully the rest would help. I did go for a run on Sunday. I took Joey with me for a mile and then did an out-and-back, for a total of 2.5 miles. I felt like I was running pretty well, but the air was SO thick with humidity it was hard to tell.

My mile pace with Joey was 12:28, and then 11:55 for a mile, and then 11:38 for the last half mile, for an overall average of 12:03/mi. Average heart rate was 152 bpm. It was a tough one, and I think it's because of the humidity. 

I did have a good drop on the scale this week, though--I was at 146.8 last week, and today I was at 144.8. This is a huge milestone, because my BMI is officially "normal" again! (At 5'4", a normal weight rage for me is 107.6--haha!!--to 145.4.) My ultimate aim is 130-135, and I'm hoping to get there by Halloween. Not for any particular reason, it just sounded like a good motivation. I plan to schedule my yearly physical at around that time, too.

Anyway, yesterday the week went from bad to really shitty...

On Monday, Jerry went into work at 8:00 and they asked him to go to South Carolina right away to work at another plant until Thursday. A few hours later, he and his coworker/friend "Joe" (not his real name) were on a plane. They went immediately to the plant--didn't even stop at the hotel first--and worked all day. At around 2:00 in the morning, my phone woke me up. I keep it on "do not disturb" when I sleep, but I can still get messages and calls from Jerry and the kids.

I saw it was Jerry calling me, and I knew immediately something was wrong. He knows how hard it is for me to sleep and he would never call at that time unless it was very important. My first thought was that he'd gotten hurt and he was calling from the hospital. When I answered, he was really upset and I thought maybe something had happened to one of his parents.

Then he said that Joe died. I was STUNNED. They had been in the break room with two other guys and I won't go into detail, but Joe had a cardiac seizure while they were sitting there talking. They immediately called 911 and started CPR, but everything happened so quickly; the paramedics said they'd done everything right, but he couldn't be saved.

Jerry is having a VERY tough time right now. Neither of us has been with someone when they died and he wasn't prepared for the emotional toll it would take. He'd held Joe's hand and talked to him while it was happening, and I told him how important that was. If it had happened at the hotel, Joe would have been alone; or if Jerry hadn't traveled with him, he would have been with strangers. At least he was with a friend.

Jerry had to stick around to speak with the coroner. He called the plant here in Michigan to let them know what happened so someone could contact Joe's family. Another coworker/friend even offered to fly down there and travel back with him (I thought of this as well, but Jerry insisted that he could come home by himself). 

His coworkers have all been so great. His suitcase was in the rental car and Joe had had the keys, so someone went out and got him some clothes (he only had what he was wearing, which was sweaty and dirty from working all day). He was able to get a flight home in the afternoon and after some delays, he made it home around 7:00 last night. He hadn't slept since Sunday night, so he crashed hard last night after we talked about everything.

He's still in disbelief and he keeps thinking "What if...?", wondering if there was something they could have done differently through the day to prevent it, but how can you prevent something that you have no idea is going to happen? He feels guilty that people are worried about him, because he said this was about Joe and not him.

I keep thinking about Joe's wife and my heart is breaking for her. That could just as easily have been Jerry. We're at the age now where it's very real that friends/peers may die from things like heart attacks and strokes, which always felt like decades away. When Audrey's husband Kevin died in December, it woke something up inside of me and I realized just how mortal we are. I'm glad we've been working on getting healthier.

Jerry's boss told him to take the rest of the week off. I got the name of a therapist from my own therapist, so hopefully he'll be able to see them soon.

So, yeah. Not a great week!

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