Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Major disappointment

A couple of hours after I wrote my blog post yesterday, I got a phone call from my sister. She said that she wasn't going to be going to Indy this weekend, and her friend Jen wasn't going either (I don't want to get into the reasons why). I'm not upset with her at all, but I am SO SO SO disappointed.

I'm not going to Indy this weekend. I'm not going to be able to do my favorite race. This would have been my fifth year in a row doing this race, and I was really excited to do it for the enjoyment of it. There were only six of us that were planning on going this year, and my brother was called to do a flight this weekend, so he said he couldn't go. Then there were only five, including Jerry and me.

Anyway, the whole point is that Jerry and I can't afford (financially) to go without the group; and it just wouldn't be the same going without my sister. If you've been reading my blog for a while, you know how much this annual trip means to me. I look forward to it all year long! This race is what started my weight loss journey, and each year that I go, I set new goals for the following year.

And then after yesterday's blog post, I saw that quite a few of you are going to be doing the race this year as well, and I was really excited to meet up at the finish line. Jerry was really bummed out too, because we use Indy weekend as a time to just be adults, and have fun without worrying about the kids (the kids stay with my parents for the weekend).

I was thinking of coming up with something to do as an alternative plan, but I can't think of anything that wouldn't cost much. So I think we'll just try and plan a fun night on Saturday with friends or something--maybe a comedy club?

The only positive to all this is that we are saving quite a bit of money by not going; and since Eli's doctor/ER visits last week are going to cost a small fortune, we can just put the money we were going to use for Indy toward the medical bills.



So anyway, enough self-pity.

Jessica and I got together for our scheduled eight-mile run today. It was lightly drizzling outside, which actually felt pretty good. It was very overcast, too. Perfect running weather.

We decided to do the 9:1 ratio again. Right away, I knew it was going to be a bad run. I felt really weak and exhausted. I have no idea why--maybe my faster run yesterday? I also had less calories yesterday than normal, because I'm trying to keep my weight under control (139 today). Maybe it was just a combination of the two.

By mile two, I was really feeling tired. I didn't know how I was going to last another six miles. I didn't bring water or Gu or anything with me, since it was "only" eight miles today, and I wished I had brought a Gu for a little pick-me-up. Jessica's knee was really bothering her badly today; mine was hurting, but not horribly. I don't understand it--sometimes my knee feels just fine and other times it's unbearable. I hope that it heals up during our tapering.

We turned around at mile four and headed back. We were both pretty quiet during the whole run, probably because we both just felt really "off" today. I'm going to rest tomorrow, and then do 12 on Thursday (since I won't be running the half on Saturday). And finish the week with four on Friday.

I was really bummed when I saw the summary of our run, and that I had only burned 580 calories in 8 miles!! My average heart rate was only 138 bpm, which is super low for a run. At a comfortable pace, my heart rate is usually 145. I was surprised what a huge difference is made in my calorie burn.
Gosh, I sound like such a Debbie Downer today! I'm super tired, so that might explain it. But I had a really exhausting week, which I'm not used to.

48 comments:

  1. Y'know what? I don't think you sound like "Debbie Downer". I think you sound REAL. It's one of the reasons I keep reading your blog. You share the ups and downs and I think that's important because we all know life isn't all giggles and sunshine and speedy paces and high calorie burn all the time.

    I'm disappointed for you, too, though. That really stinks about not going for the Indy race. :( If there's any way it can still work out for you to go I hope it does! But if not, I hope you can find an alternate activity that will still make you smile!

    ~Ang
    www.droppingtheplus.blogspot.com

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  2. I'm sorry you aren't going to get to go to Indy. I really hope there ends up being a way where you are still able to go!

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  3. Can you ask some of your runner friends to go to Indy with you in place of your sister and her friend? You probably already thought of this, but I figured it was worth throwing the idea out there!

    Way to go on the run! It's admirable that you find a way to push through. Hope your knee feels better!

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  4. Oh man! I'm sorry about the disappointments but way to tough out that 8 miles (even if it did rip you off of a couple calories!)

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  5. Keep your head up, SlimKatie! Disappointment and stress do play a huge part in training, but I am so proud of you and Jessica doing your run. I would've used the disappointment as an opportunity to back out, or even reduce the mileage at 2 miles if I felt like you.

    I know that this race was a goal-setting opportunity, amini-reunion and adult play time, but perhaps you can find two last minute victims, er... I mean, runners to join you? If not, hold your own mini-Indy and go out and celebrate with your hubster.

    Big hugs to you, lady!

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  6. Gosh, I feel for you! I don't really know what to say but that there will be a next year. Chin up.

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  7. I totally understand how important that race is to you. It's always going to be your benchmark, your beginning, and every time you do it, you're further away from the woman that did it 5 years ago. But, you also can focus on all of the new adventures you've been on and are going to do since starting your journey! You are doing SO much; sometimes something's gotta give. I hope you figure out something great to do Saturday night that includes a phenomenal meal and DESSERT!!

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  8. Sorry to hear your plan's for Indy fell through. Hopefully you will have a great time on Saturday anyways. Maybe a date night.

    As for your 8 miles, don't be too hard on yourself. At least you got it done. And didn't skip like 75% of people would have done. I am a over achiever and very hard on myself too, so I know that last very statements are hard to do. One bad run...isn't too bad if your get one really AWESOME run from it in the long run, and we KNOW you will!

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  9. Maybe still have your parents take your kids and have a weekend with the two of you doing all the things you love?!

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  10. Oh Katie! I am so sorry about Indy! My heart sank when I read this. I can only imagine how disappointed you must feel but I LOVE that you were able to push through today's low and do your training run - you are awesome! I am still going to cross my fingers that something could work out but if Indy is a no-go, then I do hope you get out on a special date with Jerry - you certainly deserve it! Thinking of you and cheering loudly for you from a tiny little island off Seattle, WA.

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  11. If the hotel cost is prohibitive, I live in Indianapolis and would be happy to have you as my guest (if you don't mind staying with a blog reader, her husband, 2 preschoolers, and 3 cats). We have a guest room. You don't seem like a stranger to me after reading all about your life, so I'd hate to see you miss something so important to you if I can help.

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    1. How awesome of you to offer, Go Katie!!!!!

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    2. Yes, GO!!!! I've gone to rubber stamping conventions & shared rooms w/ stampers I've never met & it was so fun!!! It will be just like a Bed & Breakfast!!! Amanda, you are so sweet! I love having guests & would offer, too, if I lived closer to Indy!

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    3. Wow, that is SO VERY NICE of you to offer! I've thought about it all night, playing out my options in my head. Jerry was just as disappointed as I was about not going, so we decided to try and plan something else that we can do together. I really appreciate the offer!

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  12. Oh Katie! I am so sorry this is happening! If you stayed with Amanda, and I sent you a gas card, would that help? I think your readers could get you here if you really wanted to still try to make it, and would except some help. Just sayin!

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    Replies
    1. Alicia, that is SO generous of you to offer to help out! I could never accept that. Unfortunately, racing is a luxury, not a necessity ;) Thank you so much though!

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  13. Sorry to hear about Indy! Looks like you had a great run today, even though the calories weren't as high as you'd like.
    Keep your head up! Don't like seeing you down. :(

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  14. I'm so sorry! Does that mean you lose the entry fee? I read about this race and would love to try it next year. It seems to sell out fast!

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    1. It sells out super fast! I always register for the follow year as soon as I get home from Indy. It's a VERY fun race!

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  15. what a bummer about indy (I totally think you should take up the guest room offer!) I'm heading up there Friday for the race for the first time, i'm TOTALLY unprepared for it. If hubby and I had reserved a bigger room i'd totally split it with ya!

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    1. Maybe you can split Katie's room (if it is bigger), just a thought. Most hotels will let you cancel/change reservations up to 72 hours in advance (some even 24 hours). :)

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  16. Bummer about your Indy weekend. :(

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  17. Bummer! I was so looking forward to possibly seeing you this weekend!
    My husband does the Mini every year and we go to cheer him on.
    I'll just have to wait till next year, maybe I'll have met my weight goal by then :)

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  18. Oh no! I am sorry to hear that. It will all work out for the best! Stay positive!

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  19. Oh Katie I'm so sorry to hear about Indy. I know how important that race is to you and how much you were looking forward to doing it this year (and I was excited to read your post about how it went and all the encouragement and motivation you spread to the other runners). I think you should still find something to do this weekend to celebrate how awesome you've done since your first Indy race. Make the most of the day!! Maybe your parents can still take the kids for the night and you can have a whole afternoon and evening together just being adults. :)

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  20. I feel bad you'll be missing your race this weekend! Maybe you can do something still with your sister and the gang and make it special regardless of going or not? I know how you feel about bad runs. I've had a lot of them lately and have felt like a slug with weights attached to my feet wondering how I would get through my second half next month - then Saturday my friend and I set our for a 6 miler and it was the best run I'd had since my foot surgery last year. I ran the whole thing, pain free, and we were averaging between 10:00-10:20 minute miles. (It' been a while for me to be running like that!) Anyway, it will get better. Tomorrow is a new day. Maybe your run wasn't as great because you were dealing with the effects of the trip. So proud of you for pushing through! You rock!

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  21. Hey, plans that fall through stinks, you're allowed to be bummed about it. Hopefully something wonderful and unexpected happens in its place.

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  22. I know you live near the metro detroit area (as do I) but maybe consider going up to Frankenmuth area. Pretty inexpensive..maybe even just for the day. Could be something (almost) as fun as running the race!

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  23. You have an offer for a place to stay...I will offer up $100 in gas money. Us closet blog followers need the thinspiration!

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    1. Karrie, that is VERY GENEROUS of you to offer! But I just couldn't accept that. Like I said above, racing is a luxury, and not a necessity. I will live :) I'm looking at other options for Jerry and I to do this weekend. But thank you soooo much for the generous offer!

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  24. Awwww. I'm sorry :(
    It kills me when plans fall through!!

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  25. Katie,
    I am so sorry that you are not able to go to your race this weekend! I know personally that you have been a huge inspiration to me & i'm sure other readers!
    I too had a horrible day today & completely complained about it on my blog, but that's what these are for. and quite honestly it is so refreshing to hear someone who is 100% truthful & honest. more people need to be like you!
    I'm sure that your readers are all willing to each throw in something to help you and your hubby make it to your race this weekend since you have done more then just shared your life with faceless strangers but also became our friend on our own journeys.
    Stay strong & you will do anything you set your mind to I am quite positive of that!

    Shawntel
    http://becomingmybestselfbefore25.blogspot.com/

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  26. Such a bummer :( I hope you a Jerry find something awesome to do this weekend.

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  27. Well, to put it crudely, that just sucks about Indy! I know that it won't be the same without your sister, but I'm sure your sister wouldn't want you to miss out on the opportunity. Please consider taking Amanda up on her offer and any other donations that may come your way, and go and run!

    When you're 80 years old, you won't be thinking about the money you saved, you will remember missing out on the chance of doing something fantastic...running the Indy! We (your blog readers) live vicariously through you and your accomplishments....go and kick some butt!

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  28. Katie - here's my 2 cents worth. We all love you and your blog posts. What an adventure it would be for you to stay with a blog reader and allow us to send you some gas/VISA cards. We wouldn't offer if we didn't want to do it. PLUS you could take some great pictures and write about your trip on the blog. Don't you still have a couple friends going? I say take the offers and have a great weekend! Just do it!

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  29. Katie
    It seems to me like you have so many offers (myself included - I've been thinking all night about you and how I want to help you) that you just cant refuse.
    We're not offering - we're telling you that we want to help out and you SHOULD go. Not accepting our offers just isn't an option.
    We wouldn't offer if we didn't want you to take it, so please, take our genereous offers and go enjoy yourself!
    You do talk about debt, and money, so I think if a few blog readers can pull together and make you a happy Katie, that you deserve it and you should accept it with that big grin of yours!!

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  30. I would go if I were you! Its going to be different but fun! You deserve this! Sometimes our plans fly out the window, but better things happen!

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  31. I think you should go too! It's not a vacation or something frivolous, it's for your health. It's what you look forward to most during the year! It would be so cool if in 10 years you can say you never missed one. In the name of health, go and have fun!

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  32. Katie - I have to agree with your other readers! I would also personally be willing to help (you have already helped us a TON with your positive attitude, motivation, recipes, ideas, etc - let us help you! :). Life is so short - I would hate for you to ever look back and have even an ounce of regret that you weren't able to continue your "Indy Streak" and do something you love SO much. We are here for you all the way! That said, I also believe that whatever decision you make it will be the RIGHT ONE and only you can make it. Take care and thinking of you!!

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  33. Ugh, that stinks! I can tell how much you look forward to doing this every year. Hopefully you'll be able to find something fun for you and your husband to do instead. And maybe not doing the half will help your knee heal better? I'm trying to find a silver lining for you! I hope you still have an awesome weekend.

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  34. OMG !!! No Indy !? This totally stinks :( I'm so sorry Katie.... I wish I could fix it for you. You have been looking forward and training for so long.... so, so sorry.

    My vote is to indeed keep this weekend for you and Jerry. Send the kids packing to your parents and have a "date weekend". ENJOY yourselves ....

    Wishing you happiness and peace :)

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  35. I had a thought last night as I was reading this post and some of the comments. What if those of us who wish to help you get to Indy just contributed a couple of dollars each? That would be a small thing on an individual level, but I think enough of us would love to see you make it to Indy again that together we can make it happen.

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  36. And after all, you are taking all of us with you to Indy so pleaaaase do it! :)

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  37. Ditto to wanting to donate a little money so you can go. I actually searched your site yesterday to find the Gocket info to see if I could send you some Paypal but couldnt find it :( Please reconsider the offers you have here to have a place to stay and some gas money or money for whatever. You will never know what an AWESOME inspiration you are. I struggle with boredom and stress eating and am trying to lose the last 20ish pounds. When I want to stuff my face with food, I come here and look at your before and after pictures and read some posts by you. You seriously rock and I think your readers would love to help you run a race that is so special to you. please reconsider and accept some $ from us :)

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  38. Katie - I echo what so many are saying...I'd love to send a little extra $$ for you to pay for hotel, gas, food so that you can still go. You are such an inspiration to so many of us each day, it's the least we can do for you!

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  39. I totally am on board about contributing to a 'Get Katie to Indy' fund. A lot of us really do live vicariously through your posts and besides that, they are entertaining. Paypal seems like an easy way to do it...

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  40. Ugh how did I miss this yesterday? Oh yeah I was caught up reading everyone's intro on the documentary page I forgot to stop here!
    Katie I am sorry you are missing out on this race, it is a bummer.
    Cheer Up Buttercup! Something great is bound to happen. We all thank you from the bottoms of our heart for inspiring us!

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I'd love to hear from you! I read all of my comments, and if you have a question, I do my best to respond; sometimes, however, I get busy and forget to go back to reply, so if it's important, just email me! :)